The Rocky Horror Picture Show Movie Script Cast: Dr. Frank-n-Furter (a scientist) Tim Curry Janet Weiss (a heroine) Susan Sarandon Brad Majors (a hero) Barry Bostwick Riff Raff (a handyman) Richard O'Brien Magenta (a domestic) Patricia Quinn Columbia (a groupie) Little Nell (Laura Campbell) Dr. Everett V. Scott (a rival scientist) Jonathan Adams Rocky Horror (a creation) Peter Hinwood Eddie (ex-delivery boy) Meat Loaf The Transylvanians: Perry Bedden Fran Fullenwider Christopher Biggins Lindsay Ingram Gayle Brown Penny Ledger Ishaq Bux Annabelle Leventon Stephen Calcutt Anthony Milner Hugh Cecil Pamela Obermeyer Imogen Claire Tony Then Rufus Collins Kimi Wong Sadie Corre Henry Woolf Credits (other than actors) Original Musical Play and Lyrics by Richard O'Brien Screenplay Jim Sharman Richard O'Brien Musical Direction and Arrangements Richard Hartley Director of Photography Peter Suschitzkey Film and Music Editor Graeme Clifford Design Brian Thomson Original Costume Design Sue Blane Incidental Music Richard Hartley Dances Staged David Toguri Sound Recordist Ron Barrow Music Recording Kieth Grant Dubbing Mixer Bill Rowe Dubbing Editor Ian Fuller Assistant Editor Rodney Glenn Camera Operator Denis Lewiston Camera Focus Mike Roberts Art Director Terry Ackland-Snow Construction Manager Dick Frift Set Dresser Ian Hitlaker Make Up Peter Ross-King Based on original make up designed by Pierre La Roche Hairdresser Ramon Gow Wardrobe Richard Pointing Gillian Doos Production Manager John Comford First Assistant Director Mike Gowans Continuity Sue Merry Casting Consultants Celestia Fox UK Production Accountant Ron Special Effects Wally Veevers Colin Chilvers Associate Producer John Goldstone Executive Producer Lou Adler Produced by Michael White Directed by Jim Sharman Science Fiction/Double Feature Usherette (lips) Michael Rennie was ill The Day the Earth Stood Still But he told us where we stand. And Flash Gordon was there In silver underwear, Claude Rains was the Invisible Man. Then something went wrong For Fay Wray and King Kong; They got caught in a celluloid jam. Then at a deadly pace It came from...Outer Space. And this is how the message ran: Chorus Science fiction, double feature Doctor X will build a creature. See androids fighting Brad and Janet Anne Francis stars in Forbidden Planet Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh At the late night, double feature, picture show Usherette (lips) I knew Leo G. Carrol Was over a barrel When Tarantula took to the hills And I really got hot When I saw Jeanette Scott Fight a triffid that spits poison and kills. Dana Andrews said Prunes Gave him the runes And passing them used lots of skills But When Worlds Collide, Said George Powell to his bride, "I'm gonna give you some terrible thrills," Like a... Chorus Science fiction, double feature Doctor X will build a creature. See androids fighting Brad and Janet Anne Francis stars in Forbidden Planet Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh At the late night, double feature, picture show. I wanna go Oh Oh Oh To the late night, double feature, picture show. By RKO, Oh Oh Oh To the late night, double feature picture show. In the back row, Oh Oh Oh To the late night, double feature, picture show. (lips fade into a picture of a cross) Dentonian Here they come! (Dentonians cheer and throw rice) Photographer Let's get a picture. Close together now. The folks and then the grandparents. Just of the close family. Ahhh, hold that. Beautiful. And... (snap) Dentonian Congratulations. Ralph I guess we finally did it, huh. Brad I don't think there's any doubt about that. You and Betty have been almost inseparable since you met in Dr. Scott's Refresher class. Ralph Well to tell you the truth, Brad, That's the only reason I showed up in the first place. (chuckles) Betty O.K. you guys, this is it. (everyone screams) Ralph Well Betty's going to throw the bouquet. Janet I got it! I got it! Ralph Hey big fella , looks like it could be your turn next, eh? Brad Who knows. Ralph well, so long, see you Brad. Guess we better get going now Betty. Come on, hop in. (Brad hits the car twice.They drive away) (sign saying "Be just and fear not") Janet Oh Brad, wasn't it wonderful? Wasn't Betty radiantly beautiful? I can't believe it. An hour ago she was just plain old Betty Monroe, and now... now she's Mrs. Ralph Hapshatt. Brad Yes Janet, Ralph is a lucky guy. Janet Yes. Dentonian I always cry at weddings. Brad Everyone knows that Betty is a wonderful little cook. Janet Yes. Brad Why Ralph himself, he'll be up for a promotion in a year or two. Janet Yes. Dammit Janet Brad Hey Janet. Janet Yes Brad? Bead I've got something to say Janet Uh huh. Brad I really love the skillful way... you beat the other girls... to the bride's bouquet. Janet Oh Brad. Brad The river was deep but I swam it (Chorus: Janet) The future is ours so let's plan it. (Janet) So please don't tell me to can it. (Janet) I've one thing to say and that's Dammit, Janet I love you. The road was long but I ran it (Janet) There's a fire in my heart { echo "pants" } and you fan it (Janet) If there's one fool for you then I am it. (Janet) I've one thing to say and that's Dammit, Janet I love you. Here's a ring to prove that I'm no joker. There's three ways that love can grow That's good, bad, or mediocre. Oh J-A-N-E-T I love you so. Janet Oh, it's nicer than Betty Monroe had. (Oh Brad) Now we're engaged and I'm so glad (Oh Brad) That you met Mom and you know Dad. (Oh Brad) I've one thing to say and that's Brad, I'm mad, for you too. Oh Brad... Brad Oh... dammit. Janet I'm mad... Brad Oh... Janet. Janet ...for you. Brad I love you too. Brad & Janet There's one thing left to do - ah - oo. Brad And that's go see the man who began it. (Janet) When we met in his science exam-it (Janet) Made me give you the eye and then panic (Janet) Now I've one thing to say and that's Dammit, Janet, I love you. Dammit, Janet. Janet Oh Brad, I'm mad. Brad Dammit, Janet. Brad & Janet I love you. (Cut to Criminologist's office) Narrator I would like, ah, if I may... to take you on a strange journey It seemed a fairly ordinary night when Brad Majors and his fiancee Janet weiss, two young, normal , healthy kids, left Denton that late November evening, to visit a Dr. Everett Scott ex-tutor, now friend to both of them. It's true there were dark storm clouds. Heavy, black, and pendulous, toward which they were driving. It's true, also, that the spare tire they were carrying was badly in need of some air, but, uh, they being normal kids, on a night out... well, they weren't going to let a storm spoil the rest of their evening, were they? On a night out...It was a night out.... they were going to remember... for a very long time. (Cut to inside of Car) (Richard Nixon speech on the radio) Nixon I have never been a quitter... To leave office before my term is completed is abhorrent to every instinct in my body But as President I must put the interests of America first. America needs a full time president... and a full time congress (a motorcycle passes the car) Janet Gosh, that's the third motorcycle that's passes us. They sure do take their lives in their hands, what with the weather and all. Brad Yes, life's pretty cheap to that type. Janet Oh. ...What's the matter, Brad darling? Brad Oooh. We must have taken the wrong fork a few miles back. Janet Oh, but where did those motorcycles come from? Brad Hmmm... well I guess we'll just have to turn back. (the car reverses, and a loud bang is heard) Janet Oh! What was that bang? Brad We must have a blowout. DAMMIT! I knew I should have gotten that spare tire fixed. Well, you just stay here and keep warm and I'll go for help. Janet But where will you go in the middle of nowhere? Brad ...Didn't we pass a castle back down the road a few miles? Maybe they have a telephone we could use. Janet I'm going with you. Brad Oh, no, darling, there's no sense in both of us getting wet. Janet I'm coming with you! Besides darling, the owner of that phone might be a beautiful woman and you might never come back. Brad Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey. (Cut to castle lawn) Over At The Frankenstein Place Janet In the velvet darkness, Of the blackest night, Burning bright, there's a guiding star. No matter what or who you are. Brad & Janet There's a light... Chorus Over at the Frankenstein place. Brad & Janet There's a light... Chorus Burning in the fireplace. Brad & Janet There's a light, light in the darkness of everybody's life. Riff Raff The darkness must go down the river of night's dreaming. Flow morphia slow, let the sun and light come streaming Into my life. Into my life... Brad & Janet There's a light... Chorus Over at the Frankenstein place. Brad & Janet There's a light... Chorus Burning in the fireplace. There's a light, a light Brad & Janet ...in the darkness of everybody's life Narrator And so, it seemed that fortune had smiled on Brad and Janet and that they had found the assistance that their plight requiredzz. Or had they? Janet Brad, let's go back, I'm cold and frightened... Brad Just a moment Janet, they might have a phone. Riff Raff Hello. Brad Hi! My name is Brad Majors, and this is my fiancee, Janet Weiss. I wonder if you could help us. You see our car broke down a few miles up the road... do you have a phone we might use? Riff Raff You're wet. Janet Yes-it's raining. Brad Yes. Riff Raff Yes... I think that perhaps you both better come inside. Janet You're too kind. Oh Brad, I'm frightened. What kind of place is this? Brad Oh, it's probably some kind of hunting lodge for rich weirdoes. Janet Oh. Riff Raff This way. Janet Are you having a party? Riff Raff You've arrived on a very special night. It's one of the master's affairs. Janet Oh, lucky him. Magenta You're lucky, He's lucky, I'm lucky, we're all lucky! ha ha ha ha ha The Time Warp Riff Raff It's astounding; Time is fleeting; Madness takes it's toll. But listen closely... Magenta Not for very much longer. Riff Raff I've got to keep control. I remember doing the time-warp. Drinking those moments when The darkness would hit me Riff & Magenta And a void would be calling... Transylvanians Let's do the time-warp again. Let's do the time-warp again. Narrator It's just a jump to the left. All And then a step to the right. Narrator With you're hands on you hips. All You bring your knees in tight. But it's the pelvic thrust That really drives you insane. Let's do the time-warp again. Let's do the time-warp again. Magenta It's so dreamy, oh fantasy free me. So you can't see me, no, not at all. In another dimension, with voyeuristic intention, Well secluded, I see all. Riff Raff With a bit of a mind flip Magenta You're into the time slip. Riff Raff And nothing can ever be the same. Magenta You're spaced out on sensation. Riff Raff Like you're under sedation. All Let's do the time-warp again. Let's do the time-warp again. Columbia Well I was walking down the street just having a think When this snake of a guy gave me an evil wink. He shook me up, he took me by surprise He had a pickup truck, and the devil's eyes. He stared at me and I felt a change. Time meant nothing, never would again. All Let's do the time-warp again. Let's do the time-warp again. Narrator It's just a jump to the left. All And then a step to the right. Narrator With you're hands on you hips. All You bring your knees in tight. But it's the pelvic thrust That really drives you insane. Let's do the time-warp again. Let's do the time-warp again. (Tap dancing) All Let's do the time-warp again. Let's do the time-warp again. Narrator It's just a jump to the left. All And then a step to the right. Narrator With you're hands on you hips. All You bring your knees in tight. But it's the pelvic thrust That really drives you insane. Let's do the time-warp again. Let's do the time-warp again. Janet Brad, say something. Brad Say, do any of you guys know how to Madison? Janet Brad, please, let's get out of here. Brad For God's sake keep a grip on yourself. Janet But it... it seems so unhealthy here. Brad It's just a party, Janet. Janet Well -- I want to go. Brad Well we can't go anywhere until I get to a phone. Janet Well then ask the butler or someone. Brad Just a moment, Janet -- we don't want to interfere with their celebration. Janet This isn't the Junior Chamber of Commerce, Brad. Brad They're probably foreigners with ways different than our own. They may do some more folk dancing. Janet Look, I'm cold, I'm wet, and I'm just plain scared Brad I'm here -- there's nothing to worry about. (Janet turns around, sees Frank in the elevator, screams) Sweet Transvestite Frank How do you do, I See you've met my Faithful handyman. He's just a little brought down Because when you knocked He thought you were the candyman. Don't get strung out by the way I look. Don't judge a book be its cover. I'm not much of a man by the light of day But by night I'm one hell of a lover. I'm a just a sweet transvestite From Transsexual, Transylvania. Let me show you around Maybe play you a sound. You look like you're both pretty groovy. Or if you want something visual That's not too abysmal, We could take in an old Steve Reeves Movie Brad I'm glad we caught you at home, Could we use your phone? We're both in a bit of a hurry. Janet Right. Brad We'll just say where we are, Then go back to the car. We don't want to be any worry Frank Well you got caught with a flat, well, how 'bout that? Well, babies, don't you panic. By the light of the night it'll all seem all right. I'll get you a satanic mechanic. I'm just a sweet transvestite From Transsexual, Transylvania. Why don't you stay for the night? Riff Raff Night. Frank Or maybe a bite? Columbia Bite. Frank I could show you my favorite obsession. I've been making a man With blond hair and a tan And he's good for relieving my ... tension. I'm just a sweet transvestite From Transsexual, Transylvania. HIT IT, HIT IT! I'm just a sweet transvestite Columbia, Riff Raff, Magenta Sweet transvestite Frank From Transsexual, Frank, Columbia, Riff Raff, Magenta Transylvania. Frank So Come up to the lab, And see what's on the slab. I see you shiver with antici - pation. But maybe the rain Isn't really to blame. So I'll remove the cause (Chuckles) But not the symptom. (Eleveator goes up) (Riff Raff and Magenta take off Brad and Janet's coats) Janet Thank you. Brad Thank you very much. (They start to undress them) Janet Oh! Brad! Brad It's all right Janet. We'll play along for now and pull out the aces when the time is right. Columbia Slowly, slowly! It's too nice a job to rush. Brad Hi, my name is Brad Majors, and this is my fiancee, Janet Weiss; You are... Columbia You're very lucky to be invited to Frank's laboratory. Some people would give their right arm for the privilege. Brad People like you maybe? Columbia Ha! I've seen it. Riff Raff Come along - the master doesn't like to be kept waiting. Magenta Shift it. (Janet screeches - the elevator goes up) Janet Is he - Frank, I mean - your husband? Riff Raff The master is not yet married, nor do I think he ever shall be. We are simply his servants. Janet Oh. (Cut to laboratory) Frank Magenta, Columbia go assist Riff Raff I will entertain... uh huh huh... (chuckle) Brad Brad Majors. And this is my fiancee, Janet "Vice". Janet Weiss. Brad Weiss? um Frank Enchante. (Janet giggles) Frank Well! How nice. And what charming underclothes you both have. But here. Put these on. They'll make you feel less vulnerable It's not often we receive visitors here, let alone offer them... hospitality Brad Hospitality?! All we asked was to use your telephone, Goddammit, a reasonable request which you've chosen to ignore. Janet Brad, don't be ungrateful. Brad Ungrateful! Frank How forceful you are, Brad. Such a perfect specimen of manhood. So... dominant You must be awfully proud of him, Janet. Janet Well, yes I am. (giggles) Frank Do you have tattoos, Brad? Brad Certainly not! Frank Oh well, how about you? (to Janet) Janet No. (giggling) Riff Raff Everything is in readiness, master. We merely await your (pause) word. Frank Tonight, my unconventional conventionists... you are to witness a new breakthrough in biochemical research... and paradise is to be mine... It was strange the way it happened... suddenly you get a break... whole pieces start to fit into place, not a sign of being... what a fool! The answer was there all the time it took a small accident to make it happen... AN ACCIDENT! Magenta & Columbia An accident! Frank And that's how I discovered the secret, that elusive ingredient that spark that is the breath of life... Yes, I have that knowledge... I hold the secret... to life...itself! You see... you are fortunate for tonight is the night that my beautiful creature is destined to be born! Up now! Throw open the switches on the sonic oscillator... and step up the reactor power three more points! Janet Oh brad! Brad It's all right Janet. Frank Oh! Rocky! The Sword of Damocles Rocky The sword of Damocles is hanging over my head, And I've got the feeling that someone's gonna be cutting the thread. Oh, woe is me, my life is a misery. Oh, can't you see, that I'm at the start of a pretty big downer. I woke up this morning with a start when I fell out of bed. All That ain't no crime. Rocky And left from my dreaming was a feeling of unnameable dread. All That ain't no crime. Rocky My high is low, I'm dressed up with no place to go. And all I know is I'm at the start of a pretty big downer. All Sha-la-la-la that ain't no crime. Rocky Oh ho no no All Sha-la-la-la that ain't no crime. Rocky Oh ho no no All Sha-la-la-la that ain't no crime. Rocky Oh ho no no The sword of Damocles is hanging over my head. All That ain't no crime. Rocky And I've got the feeling that someone's gonna be cutting the thread. All Sha-la-la-la that ain't no crime. Rocky Oh no no no All Sha-la-la-la that ain't no crime. Rocky Oh no no no All Sha-la-la-la that ain't no crime. Rocky Oh no no no (repeat until end -- Sha-la-la) All Sha-la-la-la that ain't no crime, Sha-la-la-la that ain't no crime, Sha-la-la-la that ain't no crime, Sha-la-la-la that ain't no crime, Sha-la-la. Frank Well really. That's no way to behave on your first day out. Rocky Ugh Ugh Frank But since you're such an exceptional beauty, I am prepared to forgive you.} Rocky Ugh Ugh (applause) (Rocky bangs his bars) Frank Oh, I just love success. Riff Raff He's a credit to your genius master. Frank Yes. Magenta A triumph of your will. Frank Yes. Columbia He's O.K. Frank O.K. O.K.! I think we can do better than that. Humph! Well, Brad and Janet, what do you think of him? Janet Well, I don't like a man with too many muscles. Frank I didn't make him... for you! He carries the Charles Atlas seal of approval. I Can Make You a Man Frank A weakling weighing ninety-eight pounds Will get sand in his face When kicked to the ground; Rocky Ugh... Ugh... Frank And soon in the gym with a determined chin, The sweat from his pores as he works for his cause Will make him glisten and gleam. And with massage, and just a little bit of steam, He'll be pink and quite clean He'll be a strong man. Oh honey... All But the wrong man. Frank He'll eat nutritious high protein And swallow raw eggs... Try to build up his shoulders, his chest, arms, and... legs Such an effort if he only knew of my plan. In just seven days... Frank & Transylvanians I can make you a man. Frank He'll do press-ups, and chin-ups, do the snatch, clean and jerk He thinks dynamic tension must be hard work. Such strenuous living I just don't understand, When in just seven days... I can make you a man. Frank Ah... ooh! Columbia EDDIE! Hot Patootie (Bless My Soul) Eddie Whatever happened to Saturday night, When you dressed up sharp and you felt all right? It don't seem the same since cosmic light Came into my life, I thought I was divine. I used to go for a ride with a chick who'd go, And listen to the music on the radio; A saxophone was blowing on a rock 'n roll show. You climbed in the back seat, you really had a good time. Hot patootie, bless my soul, I really love that rock 'n roll. Hot patootie, bless my soul, I really love that rock 'n roll. Hot patootie, bless my soul, I really love that rock 'n roll. Hot patootie, bless my soul, I really love that rock 'n roll. Transylvanian Lovely party Eddie My head used to swim from the perfume I smelled. My hands kind of fumbled with her white plastic belt. I'd taste her baby pink lipstick and that's when I'd melt And she'd whisper in my ear tonight she really was mine. Get back in front, put some hair oil on Buddy Holly was singing his very last song. With your arms around your girl you'd try to sing along. It felt pretty good. Woo you really had a good time. Hot patootie, bless my soul, I really love that rock 'n roll. Hot patootie, bless my soul, I really love that rock 'n roll. Hot patootie, bless my soul, I really love that rock 'n roll. Hot patootie, bless my soul, I really love that rock 'n roll. Frank One from the vaults. (chuckles) Rocky Ugh... Frank (opens door)Oh Baby... Don't be upset... It was a mercy killing... he had a certain naive charm, but no muscle (Rocky flexes a bicep) ...Oh! I Can Make You a Man (Reprise) Frank But a deltoid and a bicep. A hot groin and a tricep. Makes me, oooh, shake, Makes me want to take Charles Atlas by the ...ha-ha-hand. Frank & Transylvanians In just seven days I can make you a man. Frank I don't want no distention, Just dynamic tension. Janet I'm a muscle fan. Frank In just seven days, I can make you a man. Dig it if you can In just seven days, I can make you a man. Transylvanians Frank and Rocky, rah-rah-rah! Frank and Rocky, rah-rah-rah! Frank and Rocky, rah-rah-rah! Frank and Rocky, rah-rah-rah! Narrator There are some who say that life is an illusion and reality is but a figment of the imagination. If this is so, then Brad and Janet are quite safe. ...however, the sudden departure of their host... and his creation... into the seclusion of his somber bridal suite and left them feeling both apprehensive and uneasy, a feeling which grew as the other guests departed, and they were shown to their separate rooms. (Janet and Brad are shown to their separate rooms by Riff Raff and Magenta) (Janet enters room) (Brad enters room) (knock) Janet Uhh! Who is it? Who's there? Frank (Brad) It's only me, Janet. Janet Oh, Brad darling, come in. Oh! Brad, Oh Brad. Yes, my darling... but what if... Frank (Brad) It's all right, Janet, everything's going to be all right. Janet Oh, I hope so, my darling. Oh... Ah... ahh OHHH! Oh, it's you! Frank I'm afraid so, Janet, but isn't it nice... Janet Oh, you beast, you monster... Oh what have you done with Brad? Frank Oh, well, nothing. Why, do you thing I should? Janet You tricked... I wouldn't have... I've never... never... Frank Yes, yes, I know, but it isn't all bad, is it? I think you really found it quite pleasurable. Janet Oh, stop... I mean help... Brad Brad!... Oh Brad!! Frank Shhh. Brad's probably asleep by now. Do you want him to see you like... This! Janet Like this like how?! Oh, it's your fault... you're to blame... Oh... I was saving myself... Frank Yes, but I'm sure your not spent yet... Janet Promise you won't tell Brad? Frank Cross my heart and hope to die... (assorted sexual noises) (Scene with Riff Raff and Magenta, Magenta with a mop) (Riff Raff walks over to rocky) (Riff Raff grabs the candelabra) (Riff Raff scares Rocky with the candelabra) (Rocky runs away) (Rocky climbs down the elevator shaft) (Riff throws candle) (Cut to Brad's bedroom) Frank (Janet) Oh, Brad darling, it's no good here. It'll destroy us. Brad Don't worry Janet, we'll be away from here in the morning. Frank (Janet) Oh, Brad you're so strong and protective. Brad Ah, ah, ah, oh YOU! Frank I'm afraid so, Brad, but isn't it nice... Brad Why YOU! What have you done with Janet? Frank Nothing. Why? Do you think I should? Brad You tricked me, I wouldn't have... never never... never... Frank Oh yes yes, I know... but it isn't all bad, is it? Not even half bad, I think you really quite enjoyed it. (Brad starts moaning) Frank Oh... so soft... Brad Stop it... stop it... oh Janet... JANET! Frank Janet's probably asleep by now. Do you want her to see you like THIS? (Brad sits up and yells) Brad Like this, like how? It's your fault, you're to blame, I thought it was the real thing! Frank Oh come on, Brad, admit it, you liked it, didn't you? It isn't a crime to give yourself over the pleasure, Brad. We've wasted so much time already... Janet needn't know, I won't tell her... Brad Well, promise you won't tell... Frank On my mother's graoouuuuu... Riff Raff Master, Rocky has broken his chains and vanished. Your new playmate is loose and somewhere on the castle grounds... Magenta has just released the dogs... Frank Mmmm? Coming! Janet What's happening here? Where's Brad? Where's ANYbody? Oh, Brad. Brad, my darling, how could I have done this to you? Oh! If only we hadn't made this journey... if only the car hadn't broken down... if only we were amongst friends... Or sane persons, Oh Brad, Oh Brad, what have they done with him... Oh, Brad, Oh Brad -- How could you? (she fondles lever) (Rocky emits moans and general cries of pain) (Rocky gets up) Janet Oh, but you are hurt... Did they do this to you? I'll dress your wounds... baby there... let me make it all better. Narrator Emotion, agitation or disturbance of the mind... Vehement or excited mental state. It is also a powerful Master and from what Magenta and Columbia eagerly viewed on the television monitor there seemed little doubt that Janet was, indeed, ...its slave. Magenta & Columbia { echo } Tell us about it, Janet. Touch-a Touch-a Touch-a Touch Me Janet I was feeling done in, couldn't win. I'd only ever kissed before. Columbia You mean she... Magenta Uh huh. Janet I though there's no use getting Into heavy petting. It only leads to trouble And seat wetting Now all I want to know is how to go. I've tasted blood and I want more. Magenta & Columbia { echo } More, more, more. Janet I'll put up no resistance I want to stay the distance I've got an itch to scratch I need assistance. Toucha toucha toucha touch me! I want to be dirty. Thrill me chill me fulfill me! Creature of the night. Then if anything grows while you pose, I'll oil you up and rub you down. Magenta & Columbia Down, down, down. Janet And that's just one small fraction of the main attraction You need a friendly hand and I need action. Toucha toucha toucha touch me! I want to be dirty. Thrill me chill me fulfill me! Creature of the night. Columbia Toucha toucha toucha touch me! Magenta I want to be dirty. Columbia Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me! Magenta Creature of the night. Janet Toucha toucha toucha touch me! I want to be dirty. Thrill me chill me fulfill me! Creature of the night. Rocky Creature of the night. Brad Creature of the night? Frank Creature of the night. Magenta Creature of the night. Riff Raff Creature of the night. Columbia Creature of the night. Rocky Creature of the night. Janet Creature of the night. (scene change, Riff Raff being whipped) Riff Raff Owwwwwwwww! Mercy! (Being whipped by Frank) Frank How did it happen? I understand you were to be watching... Riff Raff I was only away for a minute... master Frank Well, see if you can find him on a monitor. Riff Raff Master, master... we have a visitor. Brad Hey, Scotty! Dr. Everett Scott. Riff Raff You know this earthling ... this person? Brad Why yes. He happens to be an old friend of mine. Frank I see. So this wasn't simply a chance meeting. You came here with a purpose. Brad I told you, my car broke down. I was telling the truth. Frank I know what you told me, Brad... But this Dr. Everett Scott, his name is not unknown to me. Brad He was a science teacher at Denton High School. Frank And now he works for your government, doesn't he, Brad? He's attached to the bureau of investigation of that which you call UFO's!!! Isn't that right, Brad? Brad He might be... I don't know. Riff Raff The intruder is entering the building, master. Frank He'll probably be... entering the Zen room. Brad Great Scott! Dr. Scott Frankenfurter, we meet at last. Brad Dr. Scott! Dr. Scott Brad! What are you doing here? Frank Don't play games, Dr. Scott. You know perfectly well what Brad Majors is doing here. It was part of your plan, was it not? That he and his female could check the layout for you. Well, unfortunately for you all, the plans are to be changed. You must be adaptable, Dr. Scott; I know Brad is. Dr. Scott I can assure you that Brad's presence here comes as a complete surprise to me. I came here to find Eddie. Brad Eddie! I've seen him! Frank Eddie! What do you know of Eddie, Dr. Scott? Dr. Scott I happen to know a great deal about a lot of things. You see, Eddie happens to be my nephew. Brad Dr. Scott. Janet Ah! Dr. Scott Janet! Janet Dr. Scott! Brad Janet! Janet Brad! Frank Rocky! Dr. Scott Janet! Janet Dr. Scott! Brad Janet! Janet Brad! Frank Rocky! Dr. Scott Janet! Janet Dr. Scott! Brad Janet! Janet Brad! Frank Rocky! Frank Listen... I made you... and I can break you just as easily. Magenta (Rings gong) Master, dinner is prepared! Frank Excellent. Under the circumstances, formal dress is to be optional. Narrator Food has always played a vital role in Life's rituals. The breaking of bread, the last meal and now... this meal. However informal it might appear, you can be sure that there was to be little bonhomie. (Riff Raff and Magenta wheel in a cart Riff Raff opens the lid Riff Raff places a large piece of meat in front of Frank He carves the meat Riff Raff serves it to the others Riff Raff pours and spills wine before this) Frank A toast...to absent friends... All To absent friends. Frank And to Rocky. (Frank starts a verse of staccato "Happy Birthday Rocky" and cuts it off after "Dear Rocky." Janet continues until she realizes she is the only one left singing.) Shall we? Dr. Scott We came here to discuss Eddie. Columbia Eddie! Frank That's a rather tender subject. Another slice anyone? Columbia Excuse me. (Exits room, closes door behind her, and screams) Dr. Scott (to camera) I knew he was in with a bad crowd, but is was worst than I imagined... Aliens! Rocky Ugh? Brad Doctor Scott! Frank Go on, Dr. Scott. Or should I say Dr. Von Scott. Brad Just what exactly are you implying? Dr. Scott It's all right! Brad Doctor Scott! Dr. Scott It's all right, Brad Eddie Dr. Scott From the day he was born He was trouble. He was the thorn In his mother's side. She tried in vain... Narrator ...but he never caused her nothing but shame. Dr. Scott He left home the day she died. From the she was gone All he wanted Was Rock-n-Roll porn And a motorbike Shooting up junk... Narrator He was a low down cheap little punk! Scott Taking everyone for a ride. All When Eddie said he didn't like his Teddy You knew he was a no-good kid. But when he threatened your life with a switch-blade knife Frank What a guy! Janet Makes you cry. Dr. Scott Und I did. Columbia Everybody shoved him. I very nearly loved him. Stay sane inside insanity! But he locked the door and threw away the key. Dr. Scott But he must have been drawn Into something, Making him warn Me in a note that reads... All what's it say? What's it say? Eddie's voice I'm out of my hed. Oh, hurry, or I may be dead. They mustn't carry out their evil deed. (scream) All When Eddie said he didn't like his Teddy You knew he was a no-good kid. But when he threatened you life with a switch-blade knife Frank What a guy! Janet Makes you cry. Dr. Scott Und I did. All When Eddie said he didn't like his Teddy You knew he was a no-good kid. But when he threatened you life with a switch-blade knife Frank What a guy! Janet Makes you cry. All Hey, hey, hey... Dr. Scott Und I did. (Frank pulls the tablecloth off of the table and the slaughtered remains of Eddie are seen under the glass surface) (All scream) Frank Rocky! How could you? (slaps Janet) Dr. Scott (To Brad) This way, this way. (Riff Raff and Magenta laugh) Riff Raff Shut up! Planet Schmanet Frank I'll tell you once; I won't tell you twice. You'd better wise up, Janet Weiss. You apple pie don't taste too nice. You'd better wise up, Janet Weiss. I've laid the seed; it should be all you need. You're as sensual as a pencil; wound up like an E or first string. When we made it, did you hear a bell ring? Ya gotta block? Well, take my advice. You better wise up, Janet Weiss. The transducer will seduce ya. Janet My feet! I can't move my feet! Dr. Scott My wheels! My God, I can't move my wheels! Brad It's as if we're glued to the spot! Frank You are! So quake with fear, you tiny fools! Janet We're trapped! Frank It's something you'll get used to. A mental mind fuck can be nice. Dr. Scott You won't find Earth people quite the easy mark you imagine. This sonic transducer... it is I suppose, some kind of audio-vibratory physio-molecular transport device? Brad You mean... Dr. Scott Yes, Brad, it's something we ourselves have been working on for quite some time. But it seems our friend here has found a means of perfecting it. A device capable of breaking down solid matter and then projecting it through space and, who knows, perhaps even time itself. Janet You mean he's going to send us to another planet? Frank Planet, schmanet, Janet! You better wise up, Janet Weiss. You better wise up, build your thighs up, You better wise up... Narrator And then she cried out... Janet Stop! Frank Don't get hot and flustered! Use a bit of mustard. Brad You're a hot dog, but you better not try to hurt her, Frank Furter. (Magenta throws a switch on the wall labeled Medusa and Brad turns to stone) Dr. Scott You're a hot dog, but you better not try to hurt her, Frank Furter. (Magenta throws a switch on the wall labeled Medusa and Dr. Scott turns to stone) Janet You're a hot dog -- (Magenta throws a switch on the wall labeled Medusa and Janet turns to stone) Columbia My God! I can't stand any more of this! First you spurn me for Eddie, and then you throw him off like an old overcoat for Rocky! You chew people up and then you spit them out again... I loved you... d'ya hear me! I loved you And what did it get me? Yeah, I'll tell you -- a big nothing. You're like a sponge. You take, take, take, and drain others of their love and emotion. Yeah, well, I've had enough! You're gonna choose between me and Rocky, so named because of the rocks in his head. (Magenta throws a switch on the wall labeled Medusa and Columbia turns to stone) Frank It's not easy having a good time... (Magenta throws a switch on the wall labeled Medusa and Rocky turns to stone) Even smiling makes my face ache... and my children turn on me... Rocky's behaving just the way Eddie did. Do you think I made a mistake, splitting his brain between the two on them? Magenta Ahhh! I grow weary of this world! When shall we return to Transylvania, huh? Frank Magenta, I am indeed grateful to both you and your brother Riff Raff. You have both served me well. Loyalty such as yours shall not go unrewarded. You will discover that when the mood takes me, I can be quite generous. Magenta I ask for nothing... nothing. Frank And you shall receive it...in abundance! Come, we are ready for the floor show. Narrator And so, by some extraordinary coincidence, fate, it seemed, had decided that Brad and Janet should keep that appointment with their friend, Dr. Everett Scott. But it was to be in a situation which none of them could have possibly foreseen. And, just a few hours after announcing their engagement, Brad and Janet had both tasted... forbidden fruit. This in itself was proof that their host was a man of little morals... and some persuasion. What further indignities were they to be subjected to? And what of the floor show that had been spoken of? In an empty house? In the middle of the night? What diabolical plan had seized Frank's crazed imagination? What indeed? From what had gone before, it was clear that this was to be... no picnic. Rose Tint My World A. Floor Show (Unfreeze - Columbia) Columbia It was great when it all began. I was a regular Frankie fan. But it was over when he had the plan To start a-working on a muscle man. Now the only thing that gives me hope Is my love of a certain dope. Rose tints my world, keeps me safe from my trouble and pain. (Unfreeze - Rocky) Rocky I'm just seven hours old, And truly beautiful to behold. And somebody should be told My libido hasn't been controlled. Now the only thing I've come to trust Is an orgasmic rush lust. Rose tint my world and keeps me safe from my trouble and pain. (Unfreeze - Brad) Brad It's beyond me; Help me Mommy! I'll be good; you'll see, Take this dream away. What's this? Let's see, I feel sexy! What's come over me? Woo! He it comes again. (Unfreeze - Janet) Janet I feel released; Bad times deceased. My confidence has increased; reality is here The game has been disbanded; my mind has been expanded. It's a gas that Frankie's landed! His lust is so sincere. B. Fanfare / Don't Dream It Frank Whatever happened to Fay Wray? That delicate, satin-draped frame? As it clung to her thigh How I started to cry 'Cause I wanted to be dressed just the same. Give yourself over to absolute pleasure. Swim the warm waters of sins of the flesh. Erotic nightmares, beyond any measure And sensual daydreams to treasure forever. Can't you just see it? Oh, oh, oh. (Frank jumps into pool, fog clears, and he is floating in a life-ring labeled USS Titanic) Don't dream it, be it. (four times) (Brad, Janet, Rocky and Columbia jump into the four corners of the pool. Columbia hits the water last) All Don't dream it, be it (eight times) (On sixth line, De-Medusa handle falls, and Dr. Scott is unfrozen) Dr. Scott Ach! We've got to get out of this trap before this decadence saps our wills. I've got to be strong, and try to hang on or else my mind may well snap and my life will be lived...} for the thrills! Brad It's beyond me; help me Mommy! Janet God Bless Lilly St. Cyr. C. Wild And An Untamed Thing Frank My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my...my I'm a wild and an untamed thing. I'm a bee with a deadly sting. You get a hit and your mind goes ping. Your heart'll thump and your blood will sing. So let the party and the sounds rock on. We're gonna shake it 'till the life has gone. Rose tint my world, keep me safe from my trouble and pain. All We're a wild and an untamed thing. We're a bee with a deadly sting. You get a hit and your mind goes ping. Your heart'll thump and your blood will sing. So let the party and the sounds rock on. We're gonna shake it 'till the life has gone. Rose tint my world, keep me safe from my trouble and pain. We're a wild and an untamed thing. We're a bee with a deadly sting. You get a hit and your mind goes ping. Your heart'll thump and your blood will sing. So let the party and the sounds rock on. We're gonna shake it 'till the life has gone, gone, gone. Rose tint my world, keep me safe from my trouble and pain. (Riff Raff and Magenta enter rear door in space outfits) Riff Raff Frank N Furter, it's all over. Your mission is a failure; Your lifestyle's too extreme. I'm your new commander; You now are my prisoner. We return to Transylvania. Prepare the transit beam. Frank Wait! I can explain! (Frank goes and speaks to Columbia, who goes and turns on the spotlight; and to Rocky who goes and turns on the stage lights) I'm Going Home Frank On the day I went away... All Good-bye... Frank Was all I had to say... All Now I... Frank I want to come again, and stay. All Oh, my, my... Frank Smile, and that will mean I may. 'cause I've seen, oh, blue skies Through the tears in my eyes And I realize,I'm going home. All I'm going home. Frank Everywhere it's been the same... All ...feeling... Frank ...like I'm outside in the rain... All ...wheeling... Frank ...free to try and find a game... All ...dealing... Frank ...cards for sorrow, cards for pain. 'cause I've seen, oh, blue skies Through the tears in my eyes And I realize, I'm going home. Frank & All I'm going home. (3 times) Magenta How sentimental. Riff Raff And also presumptuous of you. You see, when I said we were to return to Transylvania, I referred only to Magenter and myself. I'm sorry, however, if you found my words misleading, but you see, you are to remain here; in spirit, anyway. Dr. Scott Great heavens! That's a laser! Riff Raff Yes, Dr. Scott. A laser capable of emitting a beam of pure anti-mater. Brad You mean... you're going to kill him? What's his crime? Dr. Scott You saw what became of Eddie. Society must be protected. Riff Raff Exactly, Dr. Scott. And now, Frank N Furter, your time has come. Say good-bye to all of this, and hello to oblivion. (Columbia screams - get zapped) (Frank tries to escape by climbing the curtain) (Frank screams - gets zapped, falls) (Rocky moans over and falls on Frank's body) (Picks him up and begins to climb the tower - gets zap, zap, zap, zapped - falls into the pool to his death) Brad Good God! Janet Oh! You killed them! Magenta But I thought you liked them. They liked you. Riff Raff He didn't like me! He never liked me! Dr. Scott You did right. Riff Raff A decision had to be made. Dr. Scott You're O.K. by me. Riff Raff Dr. Scott, I'm sorry about your... nephew. Dr. Scott Eddie? Yes, well, perhaps it was all for the best, heh, heh, heh. Riff Raff You should leave now, Dr. Scott, while it is still possible. We are about to beam the entire house to the planet Transsexual, in the galaxy of Transylvania. Go... Now. (to Magenta) Our mission is completed, my most beautiful sister, and soon we shall return to the moon-drenched shores of our beloved planet. Magenta Oh... sweet transsexual..land of night... To sing and dance once more to your dark refrain. To take...that...step to the right! Riff Raff & Magenta Ha! Riff Raff But it's the pelvic THRUST! all That really drives you insaaaaane Magenta And our world will do the time warp AGAIN! Super Heroes (Brad and Janet are crawling around on the ground outside the castle, in mist) Brad I've done a lot God knows I've tried To find the truth. I've even lied. But all I know is down inside I'm... All bleeding... Janet And super heroes come to feast To taste the flesh not yet deceased. And all I know is still the beast is... All feeding... (Scene starts to spin, and fades into a spinning globe, which the narrator stops) Narrator And crawling on the planet's face Some Insects called the human race... Lost in time and lost in space And meaning. All Meaning... (Criminologist Turns off light, and thge globe remains lighted. Crim. leaves room.) CREDITS Science Fiction / Double Feature - Reprise Usherette Science fiction Double feature. Frank has built and Lost his creature. Darkness has conquered Brad and Janet The servants gone to A distant planet. Wo, oh, oh, oh. At the late night, double feature, Picture show. I want to go, oh, oh, oh. To the late night, double feature, Picture Show. *****