Review of the Girls as they appeared on Saturday Night Live

Sent in by Richard A. Percifield Jr.

I almost lost my late night cookies...

On Saturday Night Live April 12, 1997 (a popular post puberty/young adult adult show in the US)the Spice Girls were to give a "live performance". My 13 year old daughter begged us to let her see the program, and we decieded to allow her to watch it. My daughter had been alerted to this show by my wife who had seen them that morning on the network Saturday news show. She said that they were dressed nice and that they had ststed that "they did not care if the boys liked them", after they were asked why only the girls seemed to be enthralled by the group. Thus my wife was also intrigued, and wanted to see them as well. I on the other hand wanted to how see well they would lip-sync on live television, and handle that unfamiliar territory. Of course the did the only song they know by memory "wannabe" or something like that.

In the Saturday Night Live format the "music groups" sing in the third half hour segment. As the bimbo's were iluminated we saw that these nicely dressed girls were transformed into singing street walkers with massive amounts of exposed epithelium and rhymicly vibrating mammory glands. The "dance steps" Were out of sync to the music, and reminded me of a Pee-Wee Cheerleading Squad(I may be insulting the 8-10 year old girls here). When they "sang", there microphones were so close to their mouths that you swore that Shure provided their dental work. During the noise(sometimes referred to as the song "wannabe") there were multiple times that three people were singing but only two persons had microphones as dental work. Also when they showed a side view if the noise makers, the soloists voice would stop before the mouth would. The delay was up to a second at times. It reminded me of the B movie Chinese flicks. I must give them credit though, the did figure out that when the red tally light was on above the camera that they had to put the mike between them and it. Less than 10 seconds into the noise my first comment was that they were not singing it. The pathetic thing was that my daughter had to admit that they were only lip-syncing. Her opinion of the group has been tarnished and she now understands what it means to be taken advantage of by there hucksters. My wife was put off because what they said did not match what they do. I though became nauseated and nearly lost it. It took several hours for my stomach to settle down.

I think that when these cleavage bouncing pieces of female flesh are unable to put up a concert tour worthy of their hype that they will vanish into noise making obscurity like the New Kids On The Block did before them.

Richard A. Percifield Jr.


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