if you don't want to know how i feel about this then don't read it,if you read this anyway but don't like what you read, then please...don't tell me about it...because i really don't care! This page used to be on a secret link, but then i decided that it would be pointless to have it if nobody read it, so here it is...a free for all...if you can't read it because "the font makes it hard to read" well then just highlight the words w/your cursor because i can read it just fine and i like it like this! the only reason that i'm writing this in the first place is because sometimes i just need to write things down to even know exactly how i feel about them. this is something that i think about alot, so don't take everything to literal because my opinions are still forming. here's goes:

one thing that i've thought about was that maybe the whole bible thing was something that someone thought up just to satisfy human curiosity...and in the process they brought all of the wrong things that they could think of together and called them sins. i know that when most people hear this they say..."you just have to have faith and you'd believe it". well...that's how i used to think to until i tried the faith thing...it didn't last for me because when i had nothing to believe in it was kinda hard for me to have faith. i have had nothing to look at and say...hey god did this for me...or else i just didn't realize it...and to tell you the truth...most of the things that i hear people say to me when they are trying to explain why they have "faith" just sound like crap. okay...for instance: "a dog was attacking me and i just prayed, and yelled as loud as i could, in the name of god please make him stop and then after i said that the dog stopped and just left" well, maybe the dog was just trying to get away from all of the fucking yelling!!! or...better yet...maybe it just decided to stop...i just don't understand this crap! other things that i've heard are "i prayed for my daughter/son/father/mother (whichever) to get better and they miraculously recovered" to me...this is the biggest joke of all. okay...maybe there have been millions of prayers for millions of people and these few people happen to be lucky enough to recover. then they say..."well, it just wasn't his/her/my time to go". so are you saying that you are more special than every other person?...i don't know...but how come god can say...kill a 5year old...and DUH you know that they are going to go to heaven. well...why can they get the chance to not have to go through life w/no temptations at all, and then there are those who die at the age of say...24...who have horrible lives because god evidently didn't think that they were deserving of a good one, which led them to sin. the only conclusion that i can come to is that there is no god, because if he is true then how come in the bible it makes him out to be so loving and forgiving, when if you go through life and execute the sins that he has so graciously provided us (oh...sorry...let satan provide us) then you go burn in eternal hell and misery. which brings me to my point...if he isn't loving and forgiving...then i guess...the bible is a complete lie. i mean...yes, it has good points and it does try to solve problems...i don't think that you should go out and kill someone, and i think that if the bible didn't say that it was a sin then some stupid ass would go and do it!

another point:

it seems that most of the christians that i meet are SO hypocritical...even most of the preachers that i know...for instance: "i don't want you hanging out w/her she's not a good christian influence"...AHEM!!!...i thought that you were supposed to LOVE your neighbor!! if you think that they aren't christians aren't you supposed to "advance god's kingdom" and try to save them??!!

another example: "i'm gonna run his ass out of town because he listens to manson...he most worship the devil"...okay...DUH!!!...VERY conflicting ideas!!...see...he's SUPPOSEDLY "worshipping the devil" and this is bad because the devil stands for evil and "bad things" well...isn't it a evil and bad thing to threaten to beat the shit out of someone??or...am i wrong about this?

another example: how many times have i heard "the bible says to respect thy mother and father! and you aren't respecting me!" well...doesnt' the bible ALSO say to "respect thy neighbor"?? um, yes...i think it does...but i guess that matter because it's not the part of the bible that parents care to hear when they are trying to prove their point.

i sometimes think that people are just scared that they might go to hell if this bible thing is true so it's like a safety measure to believe in it, i mean...it doesn't hurt you...it just takes away some of the pleasures that you might have other wise...most of the preachers that i've heard constantly repeat, over and over, "you're not going to go see those pearly white gates if you sin"...so...the reason that you shouldn't sin isn't because you are such a devoted christian...like the bible says you should be...it's because you don't wanna go to hell and spend eternity in misery...i mean...according to the bible that should just be an added pleasure...that is if you really wanna be a devoted christian...which maybe there are like about 100 of those in the world...of which i am not one...i don't quite know what i believe...i'm just trying to be open minded and analyze every possible oppion until i can form my own...but i think that you can see which way that i'm leaning...and NO!!! i don't want to worship the devil!!

i'm going to add more to this page...but at the moment i don't have enough time to finish...so...if you accidentally came here and this doesn't offend you...then come back later and i'll have more. also, if you wanna email me w/your views...go ahead...the link is on the main page, please...don't synd me mail like "your stupid", because...it just completely proves my point.