Twenty-six pumps from a crossman

Umm so like this is the second shoeman interview.. and i think it's shorter and stuff..so here goes


Mr Martyr: Hello Kent, Alan and Andy..We're goin straight and to the point boyz..Here goes...How much do you think you suck?

kent: i suck plenty...
Andy: we dont suck we rule! we're better than.. uhh.. better than.. Hanson!.. wait no we're not..
Alan: My mom thinks we're good

MM: Whats your favorite smell?

Kt: Melting snow..
Af: i like the smell in the air right before it rains
Ac: Grape..grape..yes grape but only if im siwwy

MM: what is your ideal number of total digits?

Kt: 3 toes.. 7 on each hand
Af:the number 6
Ac: did i ever mention fish?

MM: have you ever had a moment of clarity?

Ac: pass that metamusil!
Af: that stuff that tastes bad but works..
Kt: umm the metamusil made me forget..

MM: k now for band questions..
How do you feel about john quitting?

Kt: I dont know him.
Ac: my friends are my friends and your friends are.. blimey!!!
Af: i forgot what flavor he was

MM: Where did you guys play your first real "concert"(not shoeman)

Kt: i played at ozzys with a replacement drummer from a real band
Af: at my cabin in front of a bunch of people that i didnt know
Ac:I didnt .. i havent and i wont!

MM:So umm what was your most embarassing moment, and coolest dream?

Af: when my pants fell down in McDonalds, and the time i kissed a man...on the lips... you figure out which one's which

Kt: when ryan garrioch pulled my pants down in the lunchroom in gr 5, and the time i was being chased down castle steps by a chain of mad balls and the cast of scooby-doo was outside with a dinosaur sitting on the toilet and the toilet was flushed by the dinosaur and it made madballs with tails get sucked down the toilet

Ac: wearing a dress to school in gr 8, iron man had a wrestling match with dan severn and i was the ref.. ya

MM: name your OWN 7 deadly sins

Af: cheating(relationships), lying, talking behind my back, umm racism, b.o.,cheerleaders, girls/men that think they're "all that".

Kt: perfectionists, givers, motivators, the devil's advocate, epicures, aggressors, artists

Ac: when all is said and done there's nothing left to say or do so.. read the above you jerky bastard asss prick faggots

MM: What famous person do you really hate?

Ac: dereck Collins
Af:Oasis, and Chantal Krevia-whatsoever.. shes got a BAD attitude!

Kt: Boy George, Elton John

MM: what band-cool stuff y'all been doin?

Kt: i plan to put christmas lights on my bass so when i play the lights light up. i have this feeling that if it was as easy as i thought it was, everyone would do it.

Af: im still trying to get my guitar home.. after that, i want to make a guitar out of a mannequin leg.. with the toes being the tuning thingies

Ac: i want a big drumset. oi can hit them they're loud.. they dont sound good but thats all part of my plan.

MM: If you could only say one word from now on, what would it be?

Kt: FucK

Ac: Schneyeped (rhymes with eloquent)

Af: supercalafragalisticexplialadocious (does NOT rhyme with tai-chi like some people think)

MM: what are the future plans of shoeman?

Af: well we're gonna make it as big as The spice girls, and little kids will like us cause we'll be busting out of our tops.

Kt: I plan to quit the band, because of artistic differences and my ongoing battle with heroin, overdose, survive, and write a book about it. make millions, and sell it to fox for a "world's most dangerous band" show

Ac: I gotta pee

MM: how many times have you seen titanic?

Af: well, i was alive when it sank. need i say more? i would never EVER see a movie with that crap "dicaprio" in it. (but i liked romeo+juliet)

Kt: 0, but i hear the boat scene's pretty good

Ac: i seen it 2 times, the monster scene was pretty scary

MM: are any of you gay?

Af: well.. i kissed a man, but umm.. i feel my rear..needs a big metal plate saying "exit only" (nothing against gays)

Ac : aww hell no!

Kt: no, but the hardest character for me to play would be a bisexual argentenian worker in a hand grenade factory

MM: thanx guys you've been real helpful and informative.. we got to learn all the nitty gritty about you guys, and have a good plane ride home to nairobee (rhymes with baloney). But before we go, what do you want to leave the fans with?

Kt: a big pile of fecal matter

Ac: they can have the baseball cards but they gotta stay away from the sofa

Af: Yea i wanna tell you.. next time you are eating, or sitting with a bunch of people, watch them.. wonder what they stare at while they eat..

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