Gwen Murder Plots!
Here's one from Trev!
Step 1: Obtain the bitch by calling any 1-900 number.
Step 2: Get her to your house.
Step 3: Knock her out as she enters your door carrying a box of condoms (knock
her out with an air conditioning unit).
Step 4: Tie her to a chair.
Step 5: Wake Her up.
Step 6: Play some Nine Inch Nails or Marilyn Manson.
Step 7: Continue to play Marilyn Manson as you inscribe an X in her head with
sharp kitchen or sewing implement.
Step 8: Remove her breasts (even though they are tiny) with an industrial
strength hand held chain saw.
Step 9: Proceed to use another industrial power tool (a drill) through her
cranium (her skull), but carefully avoid the brain.
Step 10: Drain all cerebral fluid from her head.
Step 11: Wave an ax in front of her head, and promptly ram it up her cunt.
Step 12: Your discretion.
Here is how I would murder Gwen.
Its a cold night as she steps out of the door of the place she
had her concert. She sees me running up to her. She sighs as she gets
ready to sign an autograph as she thinks I'm a crazed fan. I get
closer 'till I can speak.
"Sign this paper whore." I tell her.
"You don't talk to me like that. I'll get my boyfriend after you little
man." she sez.
"Just sign whore." I tell her.
She sighs againa I give her my pen. But this is not an average pen.
The minute she press the button to write the pen explodes in her hand.
"AHHHHH! Help me!" she yells.
"Shut the hell up! Say bye whore!" I tell her as I pull out my MACH
20.
After putting about 20 slugs in her I carve whore on her forehead.
By:Dan H.
From Jason:
Slash her throat open with a rusty razorblade and rip her vocal chords
out, then just strangle her with her own vocal chords, listeneng to her
trying to scream, only making a gurgling sound as the blood spills from
her neck...
Here's One from Jenn :)
I know how to kill gwen, burn her makeup.
Here's one from Chris:
we head out to the no doubt vandals show, and sneak back stage. we hide in the vandals dressing room, and secretly slip a copy of suburbia into the vcr. The vandals watch how cool they used to be, and what they've become, and they flip out and slaughter No Doubt with their guitars.
Yet another From Chris:
i would hide plastic explosive in the shit she uses to make that fake pimple on her head,
then blow her up by remote control.
From Gretchen:
First off, I would club her over the head with her two ton makeup case.
When she comes to, she will find herself tied up laying on the floor of
a dark basement. While she is squirming, she will be forced to listen
to her horrible, tortuous whining on"don't speak". That is about enough
torture that one can handle, so of course, I will be wearing head phones
with Nirvana playing extremely loud so as not to be poisoned by the
terrible music of No Doubt. I will have taped some industrial strength
metal tubes to her stomache and have placed some mice inside. On top of
each tube will be a paper towel. I will light the paper towel on fire.
The mice will get scared and try to get out. They will have to eat down
into Gwen's stomach to get out. Maybe this won't kill her, but it would
probably hurt a great deal.
I would pretend that i worked at a radio station in the area of one of her
many concerts. After a little work (it will be hard to get past guards at
place with such a famous person) I will obtain a press pass, and go backstage
untill the concert is finished. When she arrives, i will quickly work my way
through the storm of reporters and announce to her that my "radio station"
will pay her 5 million dollars, and set her up with a night alone with Fabio
if she does a commerial for the station. She will see the money that will be
comming to her, and the chance to excersize her cunt, so she will instantly
agree. When she comes to the "station", i will have her do the commercial
and then present her with a bum check for 5 million dollars, and tell her
where and when to meet Fabio. When she goes to meet "Fabio" i will be
standing there with a long blond wig on. I will take her inside and lock all
the doors. Next i will give har a drink full of sleeping medication. After
she falls asleep i will rip that stupid fucking mole off of her face and use
it to sew her asshole closed. When she wakes up i will kick it Wu-Tang style
and "keep feeding her and feeding her and feeding her" untill she pukes.
Then i will feed her some more! Then she'll start getting real fat. When
she starts crying about how fat she is i'll kick her in the jaw and say "shut
up bitch!" After she's gained 200 lbs i'll make her do a press conference
and pretend as if nothing is wrong. She will be forced to say that she loves
her new body, and all her followers should get fat like her. Next she will
tell everyone that she is quitting No Doubt to form a new band called "Now
Stout". I will then bring her back to her dark chamber where i will unplug
her butt-hole and make her eat all of her shit. Then I will stick her in a
hot dry sauna untill she dehydrates and dies!!!
BY Jessica C.
I would hypnotize Gavin so when they where having sex Gavin would sew
Gwen's cunt shut. Then the only way she could get it off would be to
remove it with a sem ripper and the bitch would be in sooooo much pain.
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