Christian Jokes
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Prayerus at nightus:
"Dear... (yawn) God. Thank you for this day today... (blink, blink)... uh... yeah... where was I?... OH! and thank you for... for..." (and falls asleep)
Jr. Highus Girls' Groupus:
"Dear God. (giggle, giggle) Well, thank you for today. (hehe)And thank you for (giggle)us to meet today. AND I HOPE THAT SALLY WILL GET OVER HER CRUSH ON LEO!!!" (bursts into laughter.
Prayerus Lameus:
"Dear God. I pray that you would help me not fail that test tomorrow. I pray that you would get Mom off my case about my room and its smell. Man, it's my room anyways. Speaking of smell, what do you think about that one Bob ripped during science! Oh, man! OH! Oops! Um, where was I?"
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Ice Breakers NOT to use
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What do u hate about our (youth) pastor?
What do you think the person to your left can do to become a better parent/student/child/sibling?
What is the latest gossip you have heard today?
How do you relate to the pressure David had to undergo during his life(try to use on someone who has no Biblical knowledge)?
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This one was submitted by Seth
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Scholars have long debated the exact ethnicity and
nationality of Jesus. Recently, at a theological meeting in Rome, scholars had a heated debate on this subject. One by one, they offered their evidence.............
THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS MEXICAN:
1. His first name was Jesus
2. He was bilingual
3. He was always being harassed by the authorities
But then there were equally good arguments that.......
JESUS WAS BLACK....
1. He called everybody "brother"
2. He liked Gospel
3. He couldn't get a fair trial
But then there were equally good arguments that.......
JESUS WAS JEWISH....
1. He went into His Father's business
2. He lived at home until he was 33
3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin, and his Mother was sure he was God.....
But there were equally good arguments that.......
JESUS WAS ITALIAN....
1. He talked with his hands
2. He had wine with every meal
3. He used olive oil
But then there were equally good arguments that.......
JESUS WAS A CALIFORNIAN
1. He never cut his hair
2. He walked around barefoot
3. He started a new religion
But then there were equally good arguments
that.......
JESUS WAS IRISH
1. He never got married
2. He was always telling stories
3. He loved green pastures
But perhaps the most compelling evidence .........
THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS A WOMAN .....
1. He had to feed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was no food
2. He kept trying to get the message across to a bunch of men who JUST DIDN'T GET IT
3. Even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was more work for him to do.
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