Erisians: The Non-Prophet Irreligious Disorganization


"The Erisian revelation is not a complicated put-on disguised as a new religion, but a new religion disguised as a complicated put-on."

According to the Principia Discordia, the Erisian movement had it's beginings in a bowling alley with Omar Ravenhurst and Malaclypse the Younger. When speaking of the problems in their lives, they shared an... experience, where time seemed to freeze, and they were visited by a chimpanzee, who said "Gentlemen, why does Pickering's Moon go about in reverse orbit? Gentlemen, there are nipples on your chest; do you give milk? And what pray tell, Gentlemen, is to be done about Heisenberg's Law? SOMEBODY HAD TO PUT ALL THIS CONFUSION HERE!" Then he showed our heros his scroll, with a diagram on it, and promptly combusted.

Our heros, realizing they might be on to something, did a little research to try to figure out what the significance of the diagram on the exploding chimp's scroll was. When they traced the writing on the apple that appeared in the chimp's scroll, they stumbled upon the Greek goddess Eris, who the Romans called Discordia. That night, they each had a dream in which Eris appeared.

She simply told them that they were free.

Later, studying the yin-yang that had appeared on the scroll, they heard a voice saying "Tell constricted Mankind that there are no rules, unless they choose to invent rules. . . and remember that there is no tyranny in the State of Confusion."

Then, our heros realized the madness involved in a religion based on the Goddess of Confusion, and amid hysterical laughter, they proclaimed themselves high-priest of their own madness.

Discordianism is an anarchist's paradise. One of it's mottoes is "We Discordians Shall Stick Apart." The criteria you have to meet to become a member of the Discordian Society is 1) decide that it exists and 2) include yourself.

Many Discordians have also declared themselves Pope. The POEE (Paratheoanametamystikhood of Eris Esoteric) distributes cards that say: "The bearer of this card is a genuine and authorized POPE So Please Treat Him Right. Good Forever."

For more information on Discordianism, do a web search! Try keywords like "Principia Discordia" "Discordian" and "Erisian".



By Amy

Resources: The Principia Discordia and Margot Adler's book Drawing Down the Moon



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