Random Acts of Nothingness Proudly Presents...


Diary of a Nothing


October 2000 Edition

Monday October 2, 2000.
I'm up all night again, not able to sleep. When ever I get sick I can't sleep at night. And when I do sleep it's only because the physical exhaustion takes over. So that sucks. On a happier note I'm going to Canada on Thursday. I get to spend the whole weekend in Stratford for a theatre festival. In other news I'm busier than I know how to deal with. I'm going to rehearsals for the main-stage show I'm in (and it's coming along). I'm working on putting up my one act play, which by the way is going really well. And I'm working for crew and getting trained for it at the same time (they hang lights and run sound and such for shows at P-burgh). I'm also trying to make it to all my classes. It's not so bad, but my planner is one scribbled mess. I don't have any more room to work on my other projects, which I guess is ok, but that means the site is going to be a little neglected. Oh well. Can't win 'em all.

C

Wednesday October 4, 2000.
I'm freaking out. Well, only a little. I called home today and talked to Matty (my fiance for those of you who don't know). He's ok. He was up last weekend and as he was leaving I guess he saw my old friend Stan*. Matty says Stan was all up in his face and he kept saying that he was going to kick his ass or whatever. So now I'm confused. Ok, I know where my loyalties lie and I know whom to believe, but that is so uncharacteristic of Stan. He's not an extremely violent person. And I know he can be a real f*ck sometimes, joking with you in a way so you don't know he's joking. Maybe he was teasing Matty, with no real intentions of starting a fight, but still. That's f*cked up.

C

Sunday October 15, 2000.
I've been reading tarot mad crazy lately. I've done at least one hundred readings in the past month and a half. I usually don't do that much in an entire year. I saw Stan this weekend. While Matty was with me. Not too many words were exchanged and you could sense the tension. Stan mentioned he was glad to see I was keeping in touch with the other side by reading my tarot. I smiled, for half a second and then frowned because I remembered Matty was grimacing at every word we exchanged. I suppose I should write to Stan and explain. Maybe I should leave him in the dark. I don't know, but they're both frustrating to deal with together when they're in the same room.

C

Monday October 30, 2000.
Things have been real eventful. My show went off this weekend fairly well. It snowed yesterday. I ordered Chinese food out. And let me tell you, it was good. I'm now gearing up for the next show and starting to work on costumes for the show after that. What do all of these have to do in the big scheme of things? Nothing. I'm just keeping myself busy until I die. Very busy. I worry about what life is about. Especially lately, around the holidays and all. Halloween is a true test of faith for me. What does it mean exactly? Is it a time to dress up pretty and get fat off candy or is it a time to celebrate the changing of the seasons, the day of the dead? Do all the spirits of the dead folks come out to celebrate with us on this day? Do I worry about stupid sh!t way too much? Well I can answer that one. Of course. See you later,

C