So many modern athletes have dabbled in music over the years.  Shaquille 
O'Neal...Kobe Bryant...oh yeah, remember when Deion Sanders decided he 
should release a rap album? weird huh? I was thinking...if you are a 
popular enough athlete, wouldn't everyone buy an album you released 
even if it was pure crap? Then I thought of the most successful athletes
currently, and the first one that popped into my mind was...you guessed
it..TIGER WOODS. Wouldn't it be great if Tiger released a rap album? 
His upper class upbringing would provide some great inspiration...like
he could rap about country clubs, or maybe summers at the shore.  And
of course, he would have to rap about how good he was at golf.  Here's
what I think it would sound like.

you play a round with me and you'll end up a casuality
my closet's full of green jackets it looks like a menagerie
i unleash my putter and tap the ball into the cup
then i give my clubs to my caddy and say "why don't you finish up?"
i'm so good i'm named after a jungle monstrosity
and compared to me, your golf game's an awful atrocity
i've got more endorsements than healthy eating
last time i checked it was your sorry ass i'm beating
your scorecard is ridden with 11-stroke disasters
my ex-caddie was a stoner and i still won the f*cking Masters
my 9-iron is made of platinum, my golf cart's a benzo
i hired a dominican guy to floss my teeth, his name is lorenzo
i got mad foreign slaves, but i keep them all well-fed
my front teeth are so huge, it looks like my mom slept with Mr. Ed
i laugh as i drive by wackass golfers stuck in the sand
when i was 3, my dad crazyglued a golf club to my hand
that's why im so damn good
i'm the only black athlete in America thats not from the 'hood
my mom made me my tiger golf club cover
shes from vietnam, she was my dad's overseas lover
every kid in the world wants to be like me
i give out my 8 x 10 glossy autographed picture for free
i win every major, i always bring the goods
i got one last thing to say: I AM TIGER WOODS.

word.