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Collards
is green, my dog's name is Blue
And
I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you.
Yore
hair is like cornsilk a-flapping in the breeze.
Softer
than Blue's and without all them fleas.
You
move like the bass, which excite me in May.
You
ain't got no scales but I luv you anyway.
Yo're
as satisfy'n as okry, jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Yo're
as fragrant as "snuff" right out of the can.
You
have some'a yore teeth, for which I am proud;
I
hold my head high when we're in a crowd.
On
special occasions, when you shave under yore arms,
Well,
I'm in hawg heaven, and awed by yore charms.
Still
them fellers at work, they all want to know,
What
I did to deserve such a purdy, young doe.
Like
a good roll of duct tape yo're there fer yore man,
To
patch up life's troubles and fix what you can.
Yo're
as cute as a junebug a-buzzin' overhead.
You
ain't mean like those far ants I found in my bed.
Cut
from the best cloth like a plaid flannel shirt,
You
spark up my life more than a fresh load of dirt .
When
you hold me real tight like a padded gunrack,
My
life is complete; Ain't nuttin' I lack.
Yore
complexion, it's perfection, like the best vinyl sidin'.
Despite
all the years, yore age, it keeps hidin'.
Me
'n' you's like a Moon Pie with a RC cold drank,
We
go together like a skunk goes with stank.
Some
men, they buy chocolate
They
git it at Wal-Mart, it's romantic that way.
Some
men git roses on that special day
From
the cooler at Kroger. That's impressive," I say.
Some
men buy fine diamonds from a flea market booth.
Diamonds
are forever," they explain, suave and couth.
But
for this man, honey, these won't do.
Cause
yor'e too special, you sweet thang you.
I
got you a gift, without taste nor odor,
More
useful than diamonds......
IT'S
A NEW TROLLIN' MOTOR!!
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