-Desperation and Anxiety-
Maybe I’m probing into a ground of insanity and preposterous deeds
In an attempt to bring myself to a common place
Where my needs are fulfilled and my desires are still far away.
Where I can still be innocent in this expanse of Earth
And I know that I will never be alone as far as my friendships and relationships go.
Equilibrium does exist somewhere in my soul.
It’s just a matter of when I can find it.

I live my life in a traveler’s way, making trips to places that I never knew
Making friends who could only laugh at the insignificance of others
And then laugh at you, because you were available for the kill.
But there was only one friend who I could never exist without
And he had to go, not in a deathly manner
But in a dramatic way that kills the very heart of both of us.
It’s just a matter of when I will find him again.

I don’t know if I could ever die alone again.
After a rebirth that I know took the very life of me to begin
The planting of my life seeds has brought new growth to my soul
Healing my wounds again. And at the same time making new ones
Because I know that I do not have my friend to look after me.
This life will embrace me in its honor, for it is mine.
It’s just a matter of when I will enjoy the gratifying reward.

This traveler’s life could never let me down, the friends, and the family
It will never mock me in my journey. This journey could never be my reason for living, however.
I know I must find this peace of mind that I found only in him.
This dramatic change in my heart that rebirth has brought should only change me for better.
And I’m looking for the better on this trip I had to partake.
I will have it all again in my hands, I promised myself.
It’s just a matter of when I come across it, or when I die the death that will lead me to the eternal salvation.
 
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