I Love Ranma

I am in love with Ranma Saotome.

I realize that this hardly makes me unique. There are others--so many others--that love him, too. I don't know their reasons...perhaps they are the same as mine...perhaps they are different. Myself, I fell in love with him first for his fighting. He is the best fighter that I have ever known, and that is saying a lot. I fell in love with the way he moves with such grace, such speed and power. The way his body moves effortlessly, as though he doesn't even have to think about what he's doing. And I love the way he plays with his opponent...not the way that a cat plays with a mouse, but the way a kitten plays with his siblings.

Then I fell in love with his personality. Sure, he's a loudmouth macho jerk sometimes--okay, a lot of times--but underneath the mask is a sweet, caring young man. Ranma makes enemies easily--things seem to just center around him for some reason, making hatred-filled rivals through (usually) no fault of his own. Certainly I--but that can wait. The point is that, although Ranma probably doesn't enjoy having people trying to beat on him all the time, he never returns that hatred. He gets annoyed, certainly, but will jump to help anyone, whether friend or enemy, when they need him. He will stick up for them, help them, without a moment's thought, without any demands, without any reproach. I think...I think he considers even his rivals as friends.

Unfortunately, I know that my love is, and will always be, one-sided. Ranma will never return my feelings. The problem isn't Ukyo. She is a pretty, smart girl, and has known him longer than any of us. I think that she's closer to him than any of us, as well. But despite that, she's only Ranma's friend, and will always be only Ranma's friend.

The problem isn't Shampoo, either. Despite, or perhaps because of, her rather...friendly demeanor, Ranma will not choose her. She is beautiful, yes, but she has used too many tricks and magic spells for him to really trust her anymore, and trust is really the one necessary ingredient for love. Besides, I think that Ranma senses that a large part of what Shampoo claims to be 'love' is actually duty...duty to her laws, her tribe, her great-grandmother. Ranma doesn't want anyone to love him because they have to.

Kodachi certainly isn't the obstacle. Frankly, I think she scares him more than anything else. Ranma doesn't seem to think poison to be an acceptable way of expressing love. Still, the poor boy is too afraid of hurting anyone, even her. He really does care about them all, which I guess is one of the reasons that I love him. He just doesn't seem to realize that delaying the inevitable is what really hurts all of us.

I really don't think that...well, the obvious...is really a problem either. Many, including Ranma, would probably disagree, but hey, we all need a little self-delusion. I like to think that Ranma wouldn't really care, once he got used to the idea...but anyway. And amazingly, my temper is not the problem. How many times have I attacked him without reason, blamed him for things that couldn't possibly have been his fault, insulted him, teased him, chased him through the streets wielding heavy objects...true, he did deserve it sometimes, but not as often as I liked to think. Yet, despite all that I have done to him, he still likes me. He still sticks up for me. He still cares.

No. What really keeps us apart is her. Akane. Not that I begrudge her--far from it. She really is a kind, sweet girl. She's beautiful, intellegent, caring. Sure, she might have a bit of a temper--kind of like someone else I know--and she does leap to conclusions a little too quickly. And yes, Ranma does insult her all the time. It really infuriates me the way he will open his mouth without thinking sometimes. But still...when they're together, and calm (which really happens more often then one would think) there's just something so special in the way that they look at each other, their words, the way their fingertips 'accidentally' brush against each other. Moments like those make me ashamed of trying to break them apart. Ranma loves Akane. And he will continue to love her for as long as I can imagine.

It took me quite a while to realize that I loved Ranma. It was hard for me to accept that I even could. But I do, and I finally realized that denying it does me no good. Unfortunately, by the time I relented, I already knew the truth. The handsome boy with the pigtail and the dancing grey eyes would never, ever, be mine. I guess I can accept that...It will be harder for the others. They have the hope that I never had. When he denies them--as he will, someday--they will be hit hard. All I hope is that someday, I'll find another man who can compare to him. But in the meantime, I just hope that I can be a part of Ranma's life in a different way. I hope that he can consider Ryoga Hibiki a friend.

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Author's Notes

1) Obligatory 'This is my first so don't shoot me' note here...Obligatory 'All characters prop. of RT-sama so don't steal 'em' note here...Also, any lawyers reading this, please don't sue. I'm only a poor college kid, but I can get free counsel. ^_^

2) Objections I'm sure will be raised:

A) Obj: Eeeewwww!!!

Ans: Get over it.

B) Obj: Ryoga is not gay!

Ans: Actually, I agree. However, this is my 'fic, and I'm allowed to take some liberties. So :P.

C) Obj: This is rather inconsistent with Ryoga's behavior in the story.

Ans: I wanted to address this in the story, but I couldn't without giving away the ending. Short answer is that people will go to great lengths to hide socially unacceptable feelings from themselves and others.

3) Thanks to RT-sama, the ML mini-debate over this very topic, and the Cult of Ryoga and Ranma-chan, even though I'm sure this isn't exactly what they had in mind...

4) Yatta! I fininshed my first fanfic!