Dirk Dangerous and a spam
written by David Hines and a spammer
MSTed by Shay Caron

The Stories
    This MSTing consists of a story (not a fanfic; that's a different thing
    altogether) and a spam E-mail. The first story is "Dirk Dangerous, Space
    Hero", by one or other of the David Hineses. It involves a rich guy's
    daughter and the Space Hero who annoys her. I'd describe it further, but
    I'm trying to erase the experience from my mind.
    The other part is an E-mail describing a program used to send E-mails,
    which I assume describe a program used to send E-mails, which describe
    a program used to send E-mails, which... never mind.

Introduction
    Mike, Tom, and Crow have apparently just watched a 12-hour marathon of
    "Cartoon Planet". Hilarity ensues; Tom doesn't get it.

Segment One
    Getting better? Hardly. Down in Castle F, Pearl tries to find herself...
    literally.

Segment Two
    Crow presents us with a nugget of joy... get the mop. Also, Tom tells a
    story from the MST3K Storybook; Crow's got an attitude problem.

Segment Three
    Tom attempts to regale us with a tale of horror, but doesn't quite make
    it. Also, Gypsy answers questions, and almost murders a certain yellow
    bot.

Conclusion
    M&TB regale us with a song before the end. Pearl steps in something else.

Stinger
    For the stinger, I chose a little bit of slapstick (no, not from the
    spam).

Reflections
    This was hellish. It took me weeks to get as far as I did on that spam,
    and I finally had to just chuck everything else. Oh well. That's life. I
    guess. Maybe.
    Dave's story was actually not that bad, but I enjoyed mocking it nonethe-
    less. I suppose I might have been a little mean, but he did literally ask
    for it.
    And something you might not have known: Mary Jo had a broken leg at the
    time this MSTing was filmed, so she actually phoned in her lines.
    ("Really?" No.)