Big white chunks of ice
litter the roadway
from the blackest skies
these were born
on this ex-boyfriend's day
as i drive west
in search of a lost color
i can never seem to find
maybe i left it in the closet
beneath his box of vinyl pants
and boy magazines
or lost it behind the dryer
in a ball of lint

every inch and fiber
of this thing erased
from my chest
leaving it white and bare
and newborn
yet missing
something
i left behind
on a bench
on Capitol and Sixth
in a town that no longer remembers
my name
until i return
to see the sky cry ice tears
until the black asphalt
is painted white
and the sky is an impenetrable fog
and all the cars stop dead
in what is it, wonder, fear, dread?
while i move ahead
to return to the scene
of my one great crime
ringing a doorbell
and staring at the doormat
that was once mine
but no one comes
so i curl into a ball
beneath the stairs
until i see you again
with your long hair
and i remember
wanting to fly away
into the clouds
to cry tears of ice.