I have received several humorous items from various sources and I thought I would share them with everyone...if you have a funny item, send it to me and I will put it on this page...

Redneck Medical Terms

Benign: what you be after you be eight
Artery: the study of paintings
Bacteria: back door to cafeteria
Barium: what doctors do when patients die
Caesarian section: a neighborhood in Rome
Cat scan: searching for kitty
Cauterize: made eye contact with her
Coma: a punctuation mark
D&C: where Washington is
Dilate: to live long
Enema: not a friend
Fester: quicker than someone else
Fibula: a small lie
Genital: a Jewish person
G.I. Series: world series of military baseball
Hangnail: what you hang your coat on
Impotent: distinguished, well-known
Labor pain: getting hurt at work
Medical staff: a doctor's cane
Morbid: a higher offer than I bid
Nitrates: cheaper than day rates
Node: I knew it
Outpatient: a person who has fainted
Pap smear: a fatherhood test
Pelvis: second cousin to Elvis
Post operative: a letter carrier
Recovery room: a place to do upholstery
Rectum: damn near killed him
Secretion: hiding something
Seizure: Roman emperor
Tablet: small table
Terminal illness: getting sick at the airport
Tumor: more than one
Urine: opposite of you're out
Varicose: near by/close by

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