Keese's Korner - week 5 results
presented by The CyberCops precinct headquarters
Week 5:
High score goes to The Legends of Flatulence!
(Paul made me say that!)
Congratulations - how'd you get so good????
Trash talkathon this week:
from Da Knish:
Children of the Astroturf,
I ask: how many losses does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of
the commissioner? A one? A twooo? A five? A SIX!!!
Congrats to the Legends for once again performing well. Three years in a
row that Mike has a solidly competitive team. Quite frankly, I'm a little bit
annoyed by it. So from here on Mike's team gets -20 points each week for
being, um, well, Mike!
I have to tip my hat to the commish emeritus for giving my ass a good
whoopin'. This was one of the most unexciting weeks to watch football so
far this year. I have two words for you Paul - "WHY KERRY COLLINS AND
NOT GARRETT??? HUH???!!" You can guess the two words by reading between those lines.
Remember, get your add/drops to me by Wednesday. Thanks.
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The Shockstress replied:
Knish,
I see no mention of the fact that there are still two teams that
are 5 and 0.......Since both of these teams have made a
tremendous comeback after rather a disasterous year last year, I
think both the Squirrels and the Shock deserve some mention......
The UNDEFEATED Princess
(P.S. i predict you will be 0 - 6 after this upcoming weekend, when you play the SHOCK!!!)
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The Crunch:
John,
I will trade you anybody you want for one week, just beat the
shock. Oops, you do not like the one week trades. I can not
stand the gloating anymore.
Dave
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Dave,
GLOATING??????? You don't know from gloating, as you have been
too "busy" "working" when i came down in person to gloat this
morning. I understand how tough it is for you losers to face the
music, but remember, last year the Shock was in the basement for
most of the season and had to take their fair share of eating
dirt from everyone who beat us. This is just a little bit of the
shoe being on the other foot!
The WINNING Princess
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Sharks:
Knowing the Princess, its an expensive shoe!
Let me go out on a limb here, barring something dumb, I
predict a win from the In-portals this week.
I believe they will pull a stunning upset over the 5-0 Shock team.
I have done my verification using day old pig spleen and the outcome
has verified it, Immorals 56 Shock 49.
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Shockstress:
Yes, it's a VERY EXPENSIVE shoe!!!
as to your bogus pig spleen prediction (and i think the
prediction came from some other part of the pig, but what would i
know from a goyicshe animal like a pig???), altho we did have one
rather low-scoring week, we are averaging 55 pts per game, so you
may be off on the score, a little; i would guess that you may
have the right numbers, but have them assigned to the wrong
teams. You are not alone on that limb, so i hope it's a BIG one,
so when you all come crashing down next weekend, the limb will
cushion your falls!!!
The Still UNDEFEATED Princess
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Keese's dumb comment:
Wasn't Goyische that impressionist artist?
Much other trash was flung, but I'm
too tired to list it all. Most of it was from those Rednecks!
Cyber Cops guest cops of the week:
The Avengers (the original ones, that is)
%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%-%
Is Your Loved One Addicted To FFL? (as opposed to regular football):
Look for the following top 10 warning signs:
1: Conspicuous well worn magazines displaying the word 'Fantasy'
(inspect closely to be sure they aren't girly magazines.
Then re-inspect if they are)
2: Instead of just wanting a team to score, your spouse says things like:
'Pass the ball to Jerry Rice this time'
'Aw, cmon, don't take Terrell Davis out - who cares if the Eagles are routed?'
'Kick that field goal from 46 yards out'
'Cmon - 6 more yards gets me another point'
3: "I'll come out for dinner as soon as I check the injury reports"
4: Phone line is tied up due to browsing all the fantasy sites
(inspect as in #1 depending on the fantasy)
5: Overheard: "I can't believe John picked up the guy I wanted again!"
6: E-mail clogged with tons of trash talk (this may vary week to week as the rivalries ebb and flow).
7: Overheard: "Let's pick on Matt again to piss him off"
8: Talk of a coup-d'etat against someone called 'Da Knish'
9: "A moment of silence for The Vipers. Oh, never mind, who the hell cares."
10. Some guy from Alabama sends a FFL newsletter and you have strange
feelings of deja vu.
FINAL NOTE: word from the Oct 4 fishing trip (on VITINC)
and no one knows who 'Bubba' is!
Angler Name : Bubba
E-Mail :
Boat Name: Eileen
Date Fished: 10/4/98
Location: Belmar
Fishing Method: Jigging
Specie: Bluefish
Size: 3-5
Bait or Lure: Metal Jigs
Water Depth: 30 Feet
Water Temp.:
Information : The BMS Charter went out on the Eileen out of Belmar and for most of the day it was very very slow fishing. At about 1:00 pm we saw some birds working the water.
We got over to them and it was NON STOP Blues action. In an hour and a half we limited out on blues.
What started out as a bad trip ended up great. See you out on the water.
Get your lineups in, folks, before Saturday midnight, and your
add/drop/changes by Weds, retries on Thursday.
Check results on this web page. And hey, let's be not be stupid out there.
KEESE