My Diabetes

This beautiful diabetes logo was made for me by a very special person in my life. It is to bring awareness to the silver gray ribbon campaigne for diabetes....please do what you can to help find a cure for this killer disease.

Diabetes is a disease in which the body does not produce or properly use insulin, a hormone that is needed to convert sugar, starches and other food into energy needed for daily life. The cause of diabetes is a mystery, although both genetics and environmental factors appear to play roles.

There are 15.7 million people or 5.9% of the population in the United States who have diabetes. While an estimated 10.3 million have been diagnosed, unfortunately, 5.4 million people are not aware that they have the disease. Each day approximately 2,200 people are diagnosed with diabetes. About 798,000 people will be diagnosed this year.

Diabetes is the seventh leading cause of death (sixth-leading cause of death by disease) in the United States. Based on death certificate data, diabetes contributed to more than 187,000 deaths in 1995. Diabetes is a chronic disease that has NO CURE.

Tell Me What You See

I am a diabetic
now tell me what you see
A junkie, a dependent
or just plain ole me

I didn't want to get sick
but so very sick did I get
I ended up in the hospital
and nearly died from this lick

I was so strong and healthy
and could never imagine thus
Started feeling weak and achey
but didn't want to make a fuss

Thought at first it was the flu
but then it dragged on and on
Was scared to find out the reason
but knew something must be wrong

The months they passed in confusion
I don't remember some
It got so bad I took to my bed
got much weaker and feeling numb

And then I just stopped eating
and much weaker still I got
Then sleep took my life over
and semi-coma was my rut

They took me to the hospital
that night is still a blurr
My brother had to carry me
walking I could no longer incur

The first few days are lost
I don't remember much
My mom she stayed there with me
I felt her love and tender touch

And then I had my baby Chaz
my bunny so precious and dear
He kept watch over me all the time
he helped chase away my fear

And then the weeks when I got home
trying to regain my strength
But then one day my sugar went low
and I started feeling faint

This scared me cause I didn't know
there would be times like this
The shaking and the confusion
another symptom to my list

And now I am adjusting
and somedays are just fine
But then there are the days
when my body is in a bind

Twice a day I shoot myself
my tummy is where I do it
And if I am late and almost forget
my body lets me know it

But I am the same person
with the same feelings and desires
I still love and feel and want a life
and my passions never tire

So now that I am a diabetic
please tell me what you see
A junkie, a dependent
or just plain ole me

Copyright © 1999 Island Princess....All Rights Reserved

Today is September 6, 1999...3:05am

Well here is where I guess I write about me...I am very good at writing about other people and events in my life but I am a little embarrassed about writing about just plain ole me. The event I will be writing about today started about a year ago. Well the symptoms started in August of 1998, although the doctors told me I must have had diabetes much longer but did not know it. I started feeling sick around August and went went to the doctor and he was treating me for a kidney infection which I did have. This was however from the diabetes and he never checked me for it. I did what he said and took the medicine but never really felt right. I dismissed this as part of the recuperation period and just went on with my daily life. However I did not get better and steadily got worse and finally just took to my bed and thought may be the flu was upon me also. Well the days went into a couple of weeks and then I stopped eating and slept around 21 hours a day. I would get up to use the bathroom and back to sleep I would go. My family started getting scared and begged me to go to another doctor. I refused and told them I just needed rest and would be well in a few days. I didn't and then I got so weak I could not hold my own body weight (120lbs.) up and needed assistance to walk down the hall to the bathroom. Finally a dear friend of the family came to see how I was doing and I tried to sit up in bed but they tell me I couldn't without help and was very incoherent. My mother, Julie our friend, and Kim, my friends mother decided they would take me whether I wanted to go or not to the emergency room. Well I needed help getting dressed and my brother had to carry me out to the car. I hadn't been outside in almost 6 weeks and by now it was November and the cold cut through me like a knife. I really don't remember much of that night. Much is all a blur but I do remember the doctor said she could not rely on the sugar test because it was so high. She ordered special blood test to confirm the reading of 794 and this took hours. The hospital was so busy I had to lay in the hallway. My mother and brother Jason took turns staying with me all through the night and standing by my side while I was semi-conscious. Finally around 7 am the next morning I am told was admitted to a room. From there I was in the hospital a total of 10 days. I don't remember too much of the first days. Just getting blood test every hour for the sugar and then on the 2nd day they started giving me insulin in a syringe. I was scared when the doctor came to me and told me I had diabetes. I didn't't really know what it was but whenever I had heard of it in the past it was not a good thing to have. I though only old people had it. I didn't know someone my age could get it and was afraid when he told me I would have to learn to give myself shots. By the next day they had me doing the shooting and learning where and how to put the syringe. I also had to learn how to take my sugar lever 4 times a day by pricking my finger and putting the blood on a strip and inserting it into a small machine called a monitor. He he he...sometimes pricking the finger is more painful then shooting myself in the tummy. The nurses were very sweet and let my family stay after hours and my mother stayed with me the entire time I was in the hospital. By the end of the 3rd day I asked my mother to have my baby Chaz brought to me. He is my bunny and is my favorite stuffed animal I have. He was given to me by someone very special and has always brought comfort to me in my times of need. He is like a guardian angel sent to me to take care and watch over me. He was a big hit among the hospital staff and one of the nurses put a white lieu around his neck and he still wears it till this day. I must admit getting used to not eating all the yummy things in life is hard. I never eat sugar but still have bad days. I was doing fine until just recently. I have been having a problem keeping my sugar under control and this is beginning to worry me a bit. I have a doctors appointment in a couple of weeks and will discuss with him what to do about it. As far as eating goes, I have not altered my eating habits so I don't understand the problem. I am told however many factors come into play when sugar is concerned. Not enough rest, feeling sick, stress and just your total outlook can affect your sugar levels. I don't know really what else to say. It has been almost 10 months since I was diagnosed and I am still learning about my illness and how it affects me. Some days are good, some days not so good, but I try to get by without too much complaining. Some days I feel sorry for myself and ask "why me", and then I think to myself, "why not me". I hope I have not bored you too much, but I guess if I have you have already clicked off this page, so if you have gotten this far down I wish to thank you for listening and invite you to go to the links I am providing on diabetes. These have wonderful information for diabetics and their families. Again, thank you and may God Bless you all.

Am I A Junkie?


i gotta shoot up....
gotta get my fix
if I don't take it now
i'll be in a mix

i'll start to shake
and i'll start to quiver
my mind will get foggy
and i'll be in a tither

my bones will ache
and i'll start to cry
start hurtin real bad
and almost die

i need my fix now
i need it real bad
when i got this way
it made my mom sad

twice a day
this needle i take
i shoot in the mornin
and nite with no break

if i don't get my fix
theres no livin with me
just go away
and leave me be

i need my fix NOW
so hand me the gun
shootin the stomach
ain't no fun

why oh why
has this happened to me
just let me go
and set me free

i am livin
in my own private hell
but if i don't keep shootin
i'll die can't you tell

am i a junkie
who can legally shoot up
like a blind man
who can beg with his cup

i am a dependent
on this drug i do live
if i could on get off
my right arm would i give

being a diabetic
ain't no fun
sometimes i just
wanna give up and run

people look at me
like i am a freak
not really good enough
and much too weak

if i could live over
what would i do
never have gotten sick
start over fresh and new....

Copyright © 1999 Island Princess....All rights Reserved

Some Great Diabetes Sites

American Diabetes Association

An international diabetes site

Take control of your diabetes

Managing your diabetes