diary

Memories

While lying here alone in my bed
my mind remembers all those heated
passion filled nights we were together

The best love making in the world was
right here in this very bed when two
lovers shared themselves and became one

Cool nights heated with loves flames and
desires reaching to the pinnacle and then
soaring beyond even our wildest dreams

Heaven was in your arms back then and
life was beautiful and so right, all
we needed was each other to conqure the world

I miss you, I miss your touch your smile
your laugh your cry
I miss everything about you

I am left with nothing but my memories
Memories of our yesterdays and our dreams
Memories of my life with the man I love

Beauty And The Beast Within

There once was a beauty
as rare as she could be
Her eyes they shined like diamonds
for all the world to see

The angels cried in heaven
whenever she did sing
The love they shared was special
on celestial wings did bring

The days they passed together
were wonderful and bliss
Each night they sealed thier passion
with a touch and with a kiss

Too short a time they had
and then that faithful day
Her love was taken from her
her life was turned cold grey

Her shining eyes now sullen
the gleam has faded now
Her life it seems so hopeless
no song she will allow

A beast it rages within her
and torments her day by day
She cannot forget her lover
or the words he used to say

"Surprise, you are my princess
I love you with a love so dear"
These words forever haunt her
as she sheds a silent tear

And Sometimes I Cry

Sometimes I dont't know
who I am
where I am
or why
And sometimes I cry

Sometimes I have pride
walk with a stride
and then I don't know...
who I am
where I am
or why
And sometimes I cry

Sometimes I take control
feeling so sure and so bold
and then I don't know...
who I am
where I am
or why
And sometimes I cry

Sometimes I am happy who I am
learned much from where I've been
and then I don't know...
who I am
where I am
or why
And sometimes I cry

Sometimes I dare to dream
and life is good so it seems
and then I don't know...
who I am
where I am
or why
And sometimes I cry

But I do know this

My life is a mess
always being put to the test
and then I don't know...
who I am
where I am
or why
And sometimes I cry

Hurting

did you ever want somethign to work so bad
so bad you felt like dying when it turned out not happening
did you ever love till it hurt
loved so much but knew it was wrong
knew it wasnt healthy
knew with your values and committments and pride it could never be
did you ever love till your life felt like it was not worth living

did you ever think that you could never love like this again
did you ever hurt so bad that even breathing was labored
did it hurt so bad your thinking was confused and foggy
so confused that all you could think about was death was the only
means of escape from the hurt
did you ever hurt so bad all rational thinking ceased to be
all you could think about was ending this hurt

I am there now, so full of hurt and relief I cannot cope
so full of thoughts and emotions I cannot think
so full of pain and rage and numbness I cannot feel anymore
how come now I got what I wanted I can't bear to think of it
we were as one heart one soul, to beautiful for mortal man
the love we shared was too big for both of us
it has been over for a very long time but the hurt keeps slipping
back into my life like a snake slithering its way undetected in the tall grass

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