Brian Matthew Kessler
XXXX Carol Road
Union, New Jersey 07083
(908)/687-XXXX (House)
(908)/687-XXXX (Bedroom)
January 7, 1992
NYPress
295 Lafayette St.
The Puck Bldg.
9th Fl.
Box 01107
NY, NY 10012
Dear 01107,
Sorry about my manner of addressing you. Let me make it quite clear that I have no delusions that you are not a number, you are a free man. Strike that... if you were a man, free or otherwise, I would not be writing this letter... you are not a number, you are a free woman... somehow that doesn't sound aesthetically pleasing, but I will ignore that for the moment. The reason I address you in such a poor manner is obvious... I have no other way of addressing you... something I hope that you shall decide to amend.
I tend to be very intelligent... I was 33rd in my high school class of 386 with a 3.3 GPA. I scored a 1210 on my SATs (700 Math, 510 English) and later scored 720 on Math II, 710 on Math I and 700 on Bio on the achievement tests. I scored a 5 (on a scale of 1 - 5) on my Computer Science AP Test. I took various honors and AP courses while in high school. I recieved the distinguished scholar award from the state and a full tuition scholarship from Stockton State College (which I elected to transfer out of in favor of Hunter).... I also tend to learn relatively quickly and from the experiences of others as well as my own.
I tend to be attractive and have had many girls tell me that I am "hot" or the like (although the girls that find me attractive seem never to be the ones I find attractive).
I have hazel eyes that shift from brown to green but are usually the former..
I have long brown hair that turns red as the sun bleechs it with the coming of summer.
I have been measured as various heights between 5'6" and 5'11", most recently 5'8".
I am currently single, but I hope to change that.
I am currently white, but I tend to turn red and then tan during the summer.
I am currently male, but I have considered changing that and then becoming a lesbian, since most of the women I meet that I take an interest in are either lesbians or would be lesbians if they weren't homophobic. This probably won't happen since A) it is too expensive B) it is too perminant C) I don't like putting chemicals in my system, which would include the necessary hormones and D) the thought of making a certain necessary amputation is painful enough without actually doing it.
I seek a female. While I can see bi-sexuality as a form of ideal state in the ability to overlook the physical that much, I have absolutely no intention of living up to that ideal. It has been my experience that with very few exceptions, myself included, men are scumb and I have little concept of why all women aren't lesbians, at least emotionally (physically I can see a bit of a point to it, but limited to procreation and perhaps some forms of carnal pleasure, although in the latter instance, from what I hear, many men can be better replaced with machines (another catagory where I make an exception for myself).
I would like to have a relationship with said female and if it is found to be favorable, then if it should last, all the better... if not, then I can learn from the mistakes and try again elsewhere, the better for the experience.
I am generous, provided I have something to be generous with, which lately isn't often, but occurs every now and then... I have learned it is not necessarily a bad thing that I don't have much money when I am entering into a relationship with a female, because when I have had it, I tend to offer to pay for everything and find myself with nothing, not even her. (I do not however buy expensive jewlry: cheap jewlry tends to look as nice, if not nicer, cost less, and is easier to replace if lost or broken.)
I am financially secure in that I am not expecting to find myself living on the streets or in squats (although I know how to get by doing so if I needed to), although I hold no steady source of income and it is doubtful that I will any time in the near future since the only thing I really need money for at the moment is so I can get myself a place in New York to live. I will need to get said place first, so I can have a job that I can actually work while living there. I am hoping all this will occur during my next semester of college, but I don't plan to hold my breath. Aside from housing I have no need for money at this juncture in my life and money for its own sake, at least in my book is silly... why work for little scraps of paper that aren't even aestheticly pleasing?
I wish I was European born (and bred, residing, etc.), but unfortunately I am an American (but not even a Native American), which basicly sucks, but there is little I can do about that, except hopefully move away eventually. I figure that part of my problem with meeting women is that over 50% of the women that I meet and like are not Americans, many of which have been from either Canada or Europe... making it very difficult for a relationship to occur, unless I move there, which is admitly part of my motivation to do so... but that is not a plan for the near future (for better or for worse)...
Right now I am trying to find my way out of the Jersey shit hole known as Union... seemingly the union of Earth and Hell... as I said above I hope the resolve that problem with a move to New York early in my next semester of college.
Enough for now... Please reply soon.
Yours truly,
Brian Matthew Kessler