Brian Matthew Kessler 

XXXX Carol Road

Union, New Jersey 07083

September 1, 1990

(201)/687-XXXX

Maya Dickson

XX Shoreham Avenue

k2g3t7

Nepean, Ottawa, Canada

Dear Maya,

What's up? I just got back from Massachusetts (or as my brother, David, and my friend, Steve, call it: Mass-of-Two-Shits) last night. After leaving Guest Quarters, we stayed at the Gull Wing, somewhere in Cape Cod. This motel was in the middle of nowhere and was almost completely vacant. The only good thing about the motel was the rather large indoor and outdoor pools and the whirlpool. The beaches had no waves and billions of small jellyfish. We went sailing twice; that was fun. We ate at a few good restaurants and a few terrible ones. For the most part though, the rest of the vacation was fairly boring.

My sadistic cat, Pepper (a female Calico we found at a hospital in Newark, New Jersey while visiting my late grandfather), is already trying to dice my feet with her claws and teeth. I don't know where my other cat, Puff (a male, tan, short haired, American tabby), is hiding. We had a third cat, Suki (actually second chronologically speaking), but he died awhile ago because of problems with his lungs. We recently acquired a fourth cat, Pih (a Siamese cross); he has been staying at my dad's office; he should be coming home soon, but I don't know when. We also have hundreds of fish, a crayfish, frogs, newts, and a large variety of extremely unwelcome insects around the house.

I've included a picture of myself. It is not a very good one, but it is all I have available. I can't really complain about the quality though; I got it for free because of a mix-up at the school. I was absent when they took the school pictures and when I came in the next day, they paged me to the office to have my picture taken. I was not going to buy it, but they needed to take it for the completely useless student I.D. cards. They took the picture with me looking somewhat of a mess to begin with. Something was on the camera lens making me look like I have a scar going down my cheek (It shows up much more on the larger copies). They accidentally mixed up the negatives and some other kid wound up with them. They came to me with the pictures and asked me if I had the other kid's. I didn't. I got to keep the pictures anyway. I will try to send you a better picture as soon as one becomes available.

School starts for us in a couple of days. There is a rumor of a possible teacher strike because of all the cut backs that were made. I hope it goes through. I am not eager to go back to school. I am taking Advanced Placement Chemistry, Physics, Calculus, Discrete Math, English, Physical Education / Health, and Seton Hall Psychology. Nice line up, no? I should have my brains completely fried within the first few weeks. I wonder how many of those preppy bastards will continue to pester me in a lame attempt to get me to conform to their ways. For people who like to think they have such great minds, they really have no mind to call their own.

I can't think of anything else to say right now, so I think I'll bring this letter to a conclusion.

Yours truely,

Brian Matthew Kessler

P.S. Need a match?

P.P.S. If you lost my address or phone number, they are both located at the top of the first page (just in case you didn't notice).