Homer: "step aside everyone. Sensitive love letters are my
specialty."
Homer's letter:
'Dear Baby,
Welcome to DumpVille.
Population : YOU!!!'
Bart: "Why the hose, Homer?
Homer: "What does it look like? I'll get our letter so wet the ink will run and no
one will be able to read it."
Bart: "Yeah, but don't other people have mail in there?"
Homer: "So a few people won't get a few letters, boo hoo. You know the kind
of letters people write!
Dear somebody you never heard of, how is so and so? Blah blah blah blah blah.
Your's truly, Some Bozo.
Big Loss!!"
Lisa: "Boy, mom sure will be happy you won 50 dollars."
Homer : "You'd think that wouldn't you? But you see, Lisa, your mother has
this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's OK in the bible."
Lisa: "Really? Where?"
Homer: "Uhh...somewhere in the back."
- Can you hold the wheel? I have to scratch myself in two places
at the same time.
- Remember, son, the trick of advoiding jury duty is to say you're prejudiced
against all races.
- Life is like a box of donuts...Hmmm, donuts...
- Just blame it on the guy who doesn't speak English. Ahh, Tibor, how many times
you've saved my butt.
- Who ever thought a nuclear reactor could be so complicated?
- Stupid itchy church pants. One size fits all...my butt !
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Homer: "All right, brain. I don't like you and you don't
like me. So just get me trough this exam and I can go back killing you slowly with
beer."
Homer's brain: "DEAL !"
KENT BROCKMAN
