At Work

I sincerely hope none of these people work here! Enjoy! 
 
Dumb People 
 
 
Several years ago we had an intern who was none too swift. 
One day he was typing and turned to a secretary and said, 
"I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?" 

"Just use copier paper," she told him. 

With that, the intern took his last remaining blank piece 
of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make 
five blank copies. 

 

I was working the help desk. One day one of the computer 
operators called me and asked if anything "bad" would 
happen if she dropped coins into the openings of her PC. 
I asked her if this was something she was thinking of 
doing. She said, "never mind" and hung up. So I got out 
my trusty tool kit and paid her a visit. I opened her CPU 
case and sure enough, there was 40 cents. 

 

One of our servers crashed. I was watching our new system 
administrator trying to restore it. He inserted a CD and 
needed to type a path name to a directory named "i386." 
He started to type it and paused, asking me, "Where's the 
key for that line thing?" I asked what he was talking 
about, and he said, "You know, that one that looks like 
an upside-down exclamation mark." I replied, "You mean 
the letter 'I'?" and he said, "Yeah, that's it!" 

 

This person had a broken lamp which he wanted to discard. 
Unfortunately, the power cord ran under his refrigerator, 
making it impossible to move the lamp while the cord was 
attached. He decided to cut the cord, since the lamp was 
unusable anyway. He didn't remember to unplug it first. I 
found him in the hallway rolling back and forth. 

 

I was in a car dealership a while ago when a large motor 
home was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle 
was in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally 
looked like an extra in "Twister." I asked the manager 
what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the 
cruise control, then went in back to make a sandwich. 

 

I called a company and asked to speak to Bob. The person who answered 
said, "Bob is on vacation. Would you like to 
hold?" 

 

A customer at Blockbuster had mentioned that before the 
movie begins a message comes on the screen saying, "This 
movie has been altered to fit your television screen." 

He then added: "How do they know what size screen I have?"