God's Voicemail

We have all learned to live with "voice mail" as a necessary part of modern 
life. 

But have you wondered, "What if God decided to install voice mail?" Imagine 
praying and hearing this: 

Thank you for calling My Father's House. Please select one of the following 
options: 

Press 1 for Requests 
Press 2 for Thanksgiving 
Press 3 for Complaints 
Press 4 for All Other Inquires. 
What if God used the familiar excuse... "I'm sorry, all of our angels are 
busy helping other sinners right now. However, your prayer is important to 
us and will be answered in the order it was received, so please stay on the 
line." 

Can you imagine getting these kinds of responses as you call God in Prayer: 
If you would like to speak to: 

Gabriel, Press 1 
For Michael, Press 2 
For a directory of other Angels, Press 3 
If you would like to hear King David sing a Psalm while you are holding, 
please press 4. 

To find out if a loved one has been assigned to Heaven, Press 5, enter his 
or her Social Security number, then press the pound key. (If you get a 
negative response, try area code 666.) 

For reservations at "My Father's House" please enter J-O-H-N followed by 
3-1-6. 

For answers to nagging questions about dinosaurs, the age of the earth and 
where Noah's Ark is, please wait until you arrive here. 

Our computers show that you have already prayed once today. Please hang up 
and try again tomorrow. 

This office is closed for the weekend to observe a religious holiday. 
Please pray again Monday after 9:30 AM. 

If you need emergency assistance when this office is closed,contact your 
local pastor. 

THANK GOD, HE DOESN'T HAVE VOICE MAIL, AND HE DOES LISTEN WHEN WE PRAY!!!!