Beer Warnings
 
The FDA is considering additional warnings on 
beer and alcohol containers. Some of the 
suggestions are as follows: 
 
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may 
make you think you are whispering when you 
are not. 
****************************************** 
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol is a 
major factor in dancing like an asshole. 
****************************************** 
WARNING, The consumption of alcohol 
may lead to unrealistic expectations 
of your automobiles actual performance. 
********************************************** 
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may 
cause you to tell the same boring story 
over and over again until your friends want to 
SMASH YOUR HEAD IN. 
****************************************** 
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol 
may cause you to thay shings likethish. 
****************************************** 
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may 
lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really 
dying for you to telephone them at 4:00 AM. 
****************************************** 
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may 
leave you wondering what the hell happened 
to your pants. 
****************************************** 
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol 
may cause you to roll over in the morning 
and see something really scary (whose 
species and/or name you can't remember). 
****************************************** 
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol is 
the leading cause of inexplicable rug 
burns on the forehead. 
****************************************** 
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol 
may create the illusion that you are tougher, 
handsomer and smarter than some really, 
really big guy named Chuck. 
****************************************** 
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol 
may lead you to believe you are invisible. 
****************************************** 
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol 
may lead you to think people are laughing 
with you. 
****************************************** 
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may 
cause an influx in the time-space continuum, 
whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps 
of time may seem to disappear. 
****************************************** 
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may 
actually cause pregnancy >> 
 
Oh...and remember, "beauty is in the eye 
of the beerholder"