Dr. Laura: Is This Woman For Real?
by Joseph C. Hinson
December 16, 2001

It was Friday December 7, 2001. I was using my break between my 8 a.m. class and my 10 a.m. class (York Tech in Rock Hill, SC) to see what was going on at the Norfolk Southern yard beside Dave Lyle Boulevard. Naturally, the radio was tuned into 1110 WBT out of Charlotte. I listen to this station more than any other station for two reasons: 1.) I like talk radio and this is the best talk station around; and 2.) my Altima only picks up AM stations.

Actually, I do have a confession. I used to think that Dr. Laura was right on many points. Now don't get me wrong. I always thought she had a Messiah complex of some sort. Maybe it would be closer to the truth to say she's a paranoiac or either that she sees herself as a martyr. It seems everyone is out to get her. The National Organization for Women, the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation, or GLAAD, anyone who has divorced and/or married a divorced spouse, sex educators, Procter and Gamble, who was one of the first to pull their ads from her failed syndicated TV show and the American Library Association. The ALA, it seems, "is boldly, brashly contributing to sexualizing our children." She then added, "And now the pedophiles know where to go."

But as I mentioned, I sometimes thought she gave some good advice. These little nuggets of wisdom always came in one on one phone calls, not at the top of each hour when she went after one of her enemies. For example, I feel strongly that the best place for a child to grow up is a loving two parent family. I also believe the best place for a child to be schooled is at home. Why let the bureaucrats decide what my child does and does not learn? They can't even decide who brings in the doughtnuts of Friday.

Furthermore, she was actually preaching tolerance for Muslims and the Islamic faith in the aftermath of the September 11th terrorist attacks. She devoted hours of her show trying to get through to her audience that the problem was not the religion the terrorists professed to believe in, but with the people themselves. As a Jew, I guess she understands needless persecution. Of course, as I say that, it seems she understands persecuting people more than persecution.

But on this day, everything worthwhile she ever said, everything worthwhile she might ever say, was called into question. She pretty much just opened the door and chucked out any bit of credibility she may have ever had with me. It happened fast, so fast that she was not ready for it. As a listener, I didn't actually catch what was happening until it actually happened.

A Tale of Two Callers

On the outside, both calls were pretty straight forward. Both calls came in the first hour of her show. (Keep in mind that WBT airs her show on tape delay. This show was actually taped on the afternoon of Thursday December 6.) Caller 1 was a man who had recently been "devastated" to find out that his wife had had an abortion. Now a few things to know about this call: the woman had the abortion fifteen years ago when she was 16 and before she met the man who was to become devastated.

She was presently 31 weeks pregnant and having complications. The doctors were hoping she could take it easy -- no stress -- and then they'd induce pregnancy at 36 weeks. Furthermore, the woman was upset remembering that she had an abortion, wondering if this was God's punishment and wondering if she'd lose the baby.

She had just told her husband about the abortion fifteen years earlier and now he was hurt. He told Dr. Laura that his wife had not "let him choose if he wanted to marry someone who had had an abortion." Dr. Laura asked if the man and his wife had had any discussion on abortion and her views on it now. He said that they had and she had told him that she was against it and hated the fact that she had an abortion all those years ago. Dr. Laura's advice to him is to get over it. His wife is probably feeling enough shame and guilt about it already and doesn't need him giving her anymore grief.

So that was that. In other words, her advice seemed to be that it had happened a long time ago. People change. Further, this had happened before the man and the woman had even met. I thought it was pretty good advice, truth be known, especially coming from Dr. Laura who has never been known for her empathy.

The second call came later that same hour. He said that twenty years ago he was addicted to drugs. He exposed himself to a minor and was arrested. He was sent to rehab, cleaned himself up -- got off drugs, in other words -- and has lived a clean and productive life since then. His question to her is if she thinks he should get his record expunged. He explains that his record states "indecency with a minor" and does not elaborate. He explains this leads people to believe he molested a child when that is not the case.

Dr. Laura is a little confused at this point. She doesn't understand the concept of getting a record expunged. The caller has to explain himself again. Getting his record expunged will mean that his record will be wiped clean of this charge. It's a legal process and not without some cost. His lawyer has told him that he should be able to win the case if some people will testify to his good character since the incident twenty years ago.

While not stated, he seems to be asking if it is ethical to do this. He's not asking for legal advice, just if it is morally right or not.

Doc Laura says she does not think it is right for a couple of reasons: 1.) Who is to say that he's really changed? All she has is his word. As for the people willing to go to court for him, why should they be believed? Anyone can lie. 2.) Parents should know what kind of person he is; he's a predator.

The caller wants to know how long he has to pay for something he did twenty years ago. She then says that for all she knows, he just hasn't been caught for that twenty years. I'm flabbergasted at this point. She's burying the guy for no good reason. I mean it's one thing to doubt a caller. That's her right as the host. But here she was beating him over the head for what seemed to be no good reason.

The caller then hit a home run. He brings up the caller from earlier in the hour. Why can she be forgiven for having an abortion fifteen years ago but he can't be forgiven for something that happened five years before that? There's a slight pause. You can imagine a thin line of sweat suddenly appearing on Dr. Laura's forehead. She regains her composure quickly though. She says that the child he exposed himself to could have been traumatized for life. I'm thinking to myself, yeah, could have been, but the baby that woman aborted is still dead.

Dr. Laura doesn't back down and eventually the phone call ends and she goes into commercial. To me, this totally invalidates anything and everything she has ever said that may be right. One could wonder if the fact that the principle party in the first call was a woman. That caller was a man who was "devastated" by his wife, and was wrong in Dr. Laura's opinion. Meanwhile the principle party in the second was a man. He was also wrong in her opinion.

I see how the second caller could leave some people feeling creepy. But we have only what each caller gives us. The woman in the first call murdered a child. This is what Dr. Laura has called abortions. Murder. But yet she is able to forgive that from fifteen years ago whereas the man who exposed himself must suffer consequences for this action for the rest of his life because the child involved could have been traumatized for life.

Who Is Dr. Laura?

Well for one thing, she is a doctor. More or less. In her book The Ten Commandments -- ironically enough, as we shall see -- she calls herself a "licensed psychotherapist." Which would be fine if it were true. Her Ph.D. is in physiology, not psychology. Though she does have an MFCC (a certificate in Marriage, Family, and Child Counseling), the State of California, where she resides and where her show is beamed from, does not consider her a psychotherapist. In fact, it is illegal in California to call oneself a psychotherapist without a state license, which she does not have. Whatever one may think of the requirement for state licenses, her claim that she is a "licensed psychotherapist" is on shaky ethical ground if not an outright lie.

So who is Dr. Laura? Well, this we know: she is her kids mom. No, really. That's how she introduces herself at the top of the hour. Every hour. Here's how it goes. She introduces "the man who produces and orchestrates the music." That's another out right lie. All he does is cue up the CDs to play the music that leads into and out of the commercials. He's a sound man. There's no orchestrating involved. She then introduces her call screener. These people generally change every so often, probably because they can't stand to work with the good doctor.

Dr. Laura then introduces herself as, "me, I am my kids Mom." Evidently, this is what has allowed her to have one of the most listened to radio shows in history, the fact that she is this kids mother. It certainly isn't her Ph.D. But wait a minute? Isn't she a vocal advocate of stay at home mothers? In fact, doesn't she believe that all mothers should stay at home with their children and home school them? Hmm. Not only does she not stay at home for her child, the kid is not home schooled either.

Since Dr. Laura is her kids Mom, who is her call screener? What about the guy who orchestrates her music? Are they parents? Are their kids so great that they are the reason they're helping with this show? I think it's incredibly selfish and self righteous that Laura introduces herself the way she does.

Oh, yeah, Dr. Laura is on her second marriage. Her first ended in divorce. And we won't even mention her nude photographs that popped up all over the web a few years ago. These pictures were taken of her while she was married -- but separated -- to her first husband. The man who took them was described by her to be a friend and mentor. He was 29 years older than she was. My hunch is that he was more than a friend and mentor, but what's the point?

At least Dr. Laura is not a hypocrite. Because that would be bad.

Oh, and another thing. Dr. Laura met her current husband, Lew Bishop, when he was still married. They eventually got married after living together. Dr. Laura calls this "shacking up" on her show. And anyone who does it is selfish and immoral. Family friend Shelly Herman said in a Vanity Fair article from 1997 that Schlessinger was pregnant at the time of her marriage. Dr. Laura has repeatedly denied this. It is interesting to note that her son, Deryk, has her last name, not his fathers. In fact, Dr. Laura has kept her last name and not taken that of her husband. She regularly ridicules women who do not take their husbands name and routinely suggests that adopted children take their adoptive parents last name as well. As we have seen, however, Dr. Laura subscribes to the "do-as-I-say" philosophy.

What's more is that she opposes mixed-faith marriages on the grounds that it leads to confusion in the children and discord in the marriage. However, she herself had a mixed-faith marriage until her husband converted to Orthodox Judaism in early 1998.

As she has said before, "I have a moral obligation to do what I say. If I don't do what I say, I should be off the air the next day."

Yeah. Whatever.

Look, isn't Dr. Laura is just some mean old woman with a radio show. Well, not really. As we have seen, she is a liar and a hypocrite. If she were to come clean with some other aspects of her life, then maybe she could regain some of the credibility that she once had. It's doubtful this will ever happen. At least not while her show does so well. If her ratings start going in the can, maybe she'll go on "Larry King Live" and push her new tell-all book.

Should we take her seriously? Of course not. But that's the trouble. Because a lot of people do take her seriously. Just listen to how many people -- mostly women -- call in her show and thank her. They thank her for impacting their lives, for saving the world, for doing God's work. And what does Dr. Laura say? "You're welcome."

One day Schlessinger told 51-year-old Maryann that her adult daughter was a "loser" not worth trying to please. Rather than defend her child, Maryann agrees. "You're terrific and God bless you," she tells Dr. Laura.

See what I mean?

One flaw in Dr. Laura’s approach with her audience is that their criticisms are not acknowledged or discussed on the air. I believe Dr. Laura has a great problem in admitting she might be wrong, though her advice on helping other people through what a real apology entails I have always, and continue to, find excellent. While taking one’s advice is often harder than giving excellent advice to others, few will be the people who don’t come to that point at least several times through their lives.

I'm not sure which group of mind-numbed idiots are worse -- Dr. Laura's followers or Limbaugh's didoheads. God help the couple who are ardent believers in both talking heads.

Now go do the right thing!

Selected Online Sources:
Dr. Laura: Official Home Page
Why Dr. Laura is (Usually) Right
The Likable Legalist Dr. Laura Is She A Much Needed Prophetess for Our Times?
Dr. Laura The Unauthorized Biography
Dr. Laura Schlessinger Wins the Rush Limbaugh Award for Excellence in Conservative Hypocrisy
Dr. Laura targets the new Sodom: Libraries
Dr. Laura, Be Quiet!
Don't Listen to Dr. Laura
The Moral Irresponsibility of ‘Dr.’ Laura
Dr. Laura's Dangerous Message Puts Kids at Risk for HIV/AIDS
Open Letter to Dr. Laura from Horizons Foundation
Dr. Laura On Tourette Syndrome
Dr. Laura: Making Friends in Dallas (Be sure to read the follow-up article.)
Dr. Laura, the Virgin Mary, and Elephant Dung
Dr. Laura Is A Big Skinny Idiot