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This is my most recent work...It's called "Alone"
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I always put my heart on the line
and in the beginning all seems well and things are going along just fine.
I know I've had some problems in the past
But, I can get over those and I know our relationship would last.
When you asked me if I was ok, I said yes, but I lied.
My mind is swimming with confusion and I couldn't think straight if I tried.
I feel I am unworthy of your love and kindness.
I feel so ugly, uncherished, and so alone.
I know it shouldn't feel like this.
You showed me another side of love, one that is nurturing and sweet and all for me.
But, when those emotions became apparent all I did was flee.
I know running doesn't help anything, but running from the pain, I know you will cuase me.
I am sheltering my heart and my soul.
All I've gone through in my life are taking their toll.
The feelings I have for you are indescribable, and something totally new.
I would always question if your love was really true.
You said that you wanted to shield me from all and protect me from bad things.
Everyone in the past, they were just flings.
I don't know if my mistakes can be forgiven, but
I do know that without you it isn't worth living.
Alone.
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"Mom"
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I did what you said, mom
I shielded my heart from pain.
It's like someone wants to hurt me, mom
If they succeed they get all the fame.
It makes me want to cry now, mom
The way I feel inside.
The way they look at me, mom
Makes me want to run and hide.
You told me to be careful of who I fall for, mom
This time I fell real hard.
And when he left me, mom
I felt like someone had dealt me a wild card.
Even though its been a while now, mom
I still have feelings for him.
The thoughts I had about him, mom
Make me feel as I was living in sin.
I don't like the thoughts I'm having now, mom
Thoughts of suicide.
I am numb all over, mom
Part of my heart has died.
I know I need some help, mom
But I don't know how to ask.
The smiling face you see, mom
It is just a mask.
Please tell me what to do, mom
Help me heal this hurt.
I don't know how much more I can take, mom
I'm starting to feel like dirt.
I've talked to some of my friends, mom
But nothing seems to help.
The words they tell me don't east the pain, mom
Even though they are heart felt.
Everything I think about now relates back to him, mom
He used to make me laugh and now he makes me cry.
Help me think of the right words, mom
To help me say Good-Bye.
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