| It all started with an entry in my guestbook--
Her name, which I have disguised to protect the guilty, is UrAnusXX -- she wrote: Sure had a lot of fun visiting your site. One complaint...it was all too brief! Please add more lunacy for my future visits. You've already been bookmarked, doll. Certainly a simple enough entry, wouldn't you say? Well, what happened from that point on was ANYTHING BUT simple! I don't always succeed, but I try to return the visit of everyone who visits my site, so off I surfed to see UrAnusXX and found she was a member of the Certified Bitch Webring (to which I also belong -- must be how she found me). UrAnusXX has put together an entertaining little site, I must say. But being the Queen of Kvetch, I of course found something to bitch about. One of her pages dealt with which, in her opinion, were the Worst Sites on the Web. In general the points she brought up were very valid, BUT I found it incredible that UrAnusUSXX complained about bad spelling on the Web when there were spelling errors all over her pages! Worse, there was a glaring error in one of her main page headlines! I tried to be nice! I really did! But when I signed her guestbook (an entry she has since deleted!) I couldn't help joking about this hypocrisy on her part. But I figured I could make it into a cute lil' pi$$ing contest to get us both hits by leaving her a hint as to how she could get back at me -- kind of like bait in a trap. The bait I left was the banner to my TONE INDIGO GETS STALKER MAIL page. Little did I know when I did this that the woman's biological hard drive doesn't track on all sectors and is riddled with software conflicts. I found that out all too soon. She took the bait IN A BIG WAY and fell right into the VENUS FLYTRAP! |
| Then the email came --
From: [email protected]
Tank yew sooo mush fer taaking
me to task abaut my speelling. It never fayles to warm ma hart to heer
from peepil hoo care enuff to cerrect me with my flawz. Eye have now maid
the prawper ejustmants on my web payge. Tanks agin fer beein sew kind!
Okay, the gal is cool, I'm thinking. She understood it was a jokey kinda thing, and was aok about it. Yeah, right. |
| A couple days later I found two entries in MY guestbook.
Name: Princess Natalie
Comments: Had a nice chat with one of my nearest and dearest today and discovered your shabby treatment of her in the form of a nasty entry in her guestbook. She shall remain nameless due to the fact that she has no idea that I have gone on a rampage on her behalf and I am unwilling to see her harrassed further by you or anyone else of your misbegotten kilt. Now, anyone who knows me knows that with my friends you do not f*ck. Well, you f*cked. And how. Not only do you get my special award but you also get a page dedicated to your lameness and you will be exposed as the walking abortion that you are. Give me an hour..... I am familiar with Natalie, in fact I have her WONDERFUL Award on my TONE INDIGO GETS AWARDS page. Now I can't say this posting didn't worry me a bit -- after all, Princess Natalie is, well, Princess Natalie -- her rather unusual followers are LEGION! Natalie's hit counter goes faster than a five dollar whore at a Saturday Night Shriner's Convention and if, indeed, she had decided to attack me in defense of a friend then I would surely have something to worry about. But something about the posting just didn't ring true . . . maybe it was the word "kilt" -- is this supposed to mean "ilk" ??
Name: Princess Natalie
Website Title: Princess Natalie's Revenge Comments: I'm back as promised. Your special dedication page awaits you and you have now been exposed. You'll forgive me if I don't add an html graphic here. I feel that I have expended more than enough time on the likes of you than necessary. On the other hand, the situation called for it and I sure had a ball. Let's see, I expect my loyal following to be viewing the page shortly and when they do, your hate mail should be arriving....(looking at my watch)....any time now! |
| Well, after reading the second entry I was in a bit
of a quandary. Do I email Natalie? Do I wait and see what happens? Or is
there another way? Something was bothering me about these entries, but
I couldn't quite put my finger on what it was.
If you've read ANY of my pages, you know that DeeJ is a friend of mine. She's also a friend of Princess Natalie's, so I told her to check out the guestbook entries. She agreed something didn't look quite right, and she offered to play detective, I gotta say the girl missed her calling-- my new nickname for DeeJ is Cybersleuth! She confirmed what I thought in her new guestbook entry -- Name:
DeeJ
What DeeJ found was mind-boggling -- this UrAnusXX had IMPERSONATED Princess Natalie (not to mention stealing her bandwidth by linking to Nat's gifs!) and left those two entries in my guestbook! Whew! I can't believe ANYBODY who has read Princess Natalie's pages would INTENTIONALLY go up against her, so there were only a couple possible explanations. One -- UrAnusXX never read all my pages, didn't know I knew who Natalie was, and thought she could get away with it. Two -- the bats have taken over UrAnusXX's belfry. The very next day I had a new entry in my guestbook
--
Comments:
This was more like it, a REAL guestbook entry. Glad you came over for a repeat visit, Princess Natalie! And I am HONORED to be Miss Teen Planet EgoMania! I'm ready! The guestbooks are on high security, the fine china is packed away, BRING ON THE NATALIE FANS! HAHAHAHA! There will be more to this story, I'm sure. As things happen I'll let you all know. A few things that are in process -- UrAnusXX, who had to correct her page numerous times to qualify for entry INTO the Certified Bitch Webring has just been BOOTED OUT of the Certified Bitch Webring for hiding behind Natalie -- Not exactly prime bitch behavior. Now I don't know what DeeJ might have planned for UrAnusXX, but DeeJ is not to be messed with either -- and UrAnusXX has just succeeded in insulting both Princess Natalie and me, who are both friends of DeeJ. My revenge? This page, probably a new webring, a new award, and the satisfaction of knowing that I am MISS TEEN PLANET EGOMANIA for the month of July. Well, UrAnusXX, I have granted you your guestbook wish and added more lunacy to my pages -- YOURS!!! And to make it perfectly clear to you, UrAnusXX, since it's painfully obvious you don't own a dictionary, it is I-N-I-Q-U-I-T-Y, not eniquity or inequity! I don't know what else might be coming down, or who else might have it in for UrAnusXX, but I do know this. UrAnusXX, I wouldn't want to be in your size 12s! Not for a MILLION BUCKS! *Looking at my watch* ANY TIME NOW! |
| There's more to this story -- a lot more! But if you want to take a nice little break before plunging into ACT 2, I suggest you go HERE and tell UrAnusXXY in graphic detail exactly what you think of her! |
| UPDATE --
From: [email protected] |
UPDATED! AGAIN!Yeah, folks, UrAnusXX is still at it. This woman(?) has got to get a LIFE! You won't BELIEVE what she's done this time. Her insanity knows NO BOUNDS and after pulling this stunt she's definitely DEAD MEAT! Read on, and you'll see what I mean. |
