There's just no predicting what most people will say or do, since each of us is the lead in our own little drama, and everyone else is just a walk on -- and the lead character in any drama has to have an overriding motivation behind his or her actions in order for the drama to make sense. This drama which has been played out on my site is now beginning Act Two -- and the lead character's overriding motivation is SURVIVAL against insurmountable odds-- namely the wrath of Princess Natalie, DeeJ, and yours truly, toneindigo!

Keep that motivation in mind as you read the email from UrAnusXX which was sent to Princess Natalie, DeeJ and me.

Whoa! Girls! I've heard of bum-rushing, but man oh man! Just checked my mail from ToneIndigo and you could have knocked me right the hell over with a feather. This whole situation has gone from hardy har har to WHAT THE F**K??!! I never, but never, explain myself but in this case I don't mind doing the explaining. Ladies, my niece Robin (a.k.a. Chicky) has access to my computer 5 days a week while babysitting my son. She's here in the late evenings/early mornings while I and Jeff work the graveyard shifts. She always asks "So how many people visited your site today, Aunt Sandra?" and she checks my guestbook. She then clicks on all the banners displayed and visits the different sites. That's where you came in, I suppose, Princess Natalie. She absolutely adored your website and visits there every chance she gets. Then sometime later she sees the banner for ToneIndigo and the guestbook entry and I hear her exclaim "Aunt Sandra!! This guy wrote something mean in your guestbook!" while I was getting ready for work. So I asked her what it said and she told me that this person wrote about my bad spelling. Well, I really didn't think it was that big of deal but she insisted that it was. I walked over to the p.c., looked at it, and told her I didn't mind. Sometimes I spell ok, sometimes I don't. There's probably some typos here, too, but who cares? I then E-mailed you a light-hearted letter, ToneIndigo as you'll remember, and left it at that. All in good fun, right? Guess not, because then Robin told me she was going to visit your site and write something in YOUR guestbook. As I was leaving, I told her to be nice and I'd call her later. She asked me if she could delete the entry in my guestbook and I said I didn't care. And I didn't care seeing as I was on my way to work and was already focused on that. I told her the name of the guestbook and the password and walked out the door. What she failed to tell me is that not only did she sign your guestbook, ToneIndigo, (under Princess Natalie's name, no less!) but she also created a page denouncing ToneIndigo (also under Princess Natalie's name). I found this out yesterday when the minute Robin walked in the door and ran excitedly to my computer, signed on, and showed it to me. At first I thought I was looking at a genuine Planet Ego Mania page. I laughed at the unexpectedness of it and thought "Omigod, Princess Natalie's on the rampage". Robin then says, "How do you like my page, Aunt Sandra? It only took me an hour and I hope ToneIndigo sees this and cries!" I couldn't believe it. Absolutely could not believe it. I ordered her off the computer and asked her if she was freakin crazy and why the hell she would use your name, Princess Natalie, and not her own if she was bent on something this childish. She then said (if you can stand another minute of this) "Because it looks like something Natalie would do and I don't want to get blamed for it and get TOS-ed!". Understandable, in a lame sort of way, if you remember that this is coming from a girl young enough to still believe the story of "TOS Advisors" and how your account will get terminated over the least little violation. I guess she hasn't yet realized that AOL's a joke and really doesn't give a sh*t what goes on outside kiddie porn. I yelled at her to sign back on and delete that crap and write an apology. She said she would and I went to work again. Was I wrong. Sure, she deleted the lame page but did she apologize? Not from the looks of your letter I received today, ToneIndigo. I decided to write the twice damned apology letter myself seeing that she's either (A) too humiliated now at the verbal lashing she got or (B) is still afraid she'll get TOS-ed. Anyway, you hear this every day and every night about some asshole saying something or doing something and then the "Mother" jumps online to apologize and you know that 90% of the time it's bullshit. Ladies, in this case it happens to be pathetic but true. I have to admit, after the initial anger I chuckled at the "Dyslexia" part of the page and will remember to ask my niece where the hell she got it from. I believe in having fun online and a little irreverence never hurt anybody...but I draw the line when it actually harms someone and/or their reputation. I never fill out malicious entries in guestbooks and never mail out hate letters. I'm not in the revenge business. I take my satisfaction from light sarcasm and that's about it. You gals have done a wonderful job banding together to form a united front in a situation you perceived as vicious. And you perceived it correctly....just from the wrong person. Since Robin is hiding under the covers, it's up to me to throw them off and force her to face what she's done. You can e-mail her at [email protected] and tell her what you think. I won't tell and will just let her discover the nasty surprise like she likewise did me, albeit innocently.

ToneIndigo: This letter is mostly for you as you are the injured party. The little sh*thead is going to get what's coming for this, by me or you or preferably both. I admire your website (and still love the Beenie Baby Blasters!) and know it will continue to be a success. I also thought the "Flytrap" thing was hilarious and in keeping with all this drama. I can't be upset when I am in complete understanding on why you created it in the first place. And I guess I could use the notoriety. Just kidding. Sheesh, what a friggin week.....

Princess Natalie: You deserve equal mention just for the fact that it was your name used in a slanderous manner. It was in the form of an ignorant pre-teen who thinks punters and anonymity (lol...spelled right?) are the only ways to successfully communicate online and is an excellent brag technique. Anyway, I still have the link to your site posted on mine. My opinion on your creation has not altered one bit due to this misunderstanding of colossal magnitude. I still visit once in a while and look forward to when you add new stuff. I truly and sincerely apologize for all of this. God, I'm really starting to hate being an aunt......

DeeJPearls: You have been the perfect lady through all of this...and not many people can say the same. Your staunch support of your friend is great to see and I wish I see it more online. I won't say that I'm not disappointed that you've taken me off your webring but I really can't blame you, can I? After all, I'm the one indirectly responsible for the whole sorry mess and am starting to wish I never got a guestbook. Or a niece. So, I have obliged you and removed the link from my page now that I'm an ex-member. It was fun while it lasted!

Again my apologies. Robin's toast.

I might be inclined to believe this little saga BUT after reading UrAnusXX's Site pages, and the toneindigo slam page, and the guestbook entries, and the emails, I can't help thinking that they were all written by the same person, namely UrAnusXX. There are other oddities and inconsistencies as well, which make me think that she's now invented a niece as conveniently as she impersonated Natalie. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm not.

1. You and your niece, CHICKY, post PROMINENTLY on your site an APOLOGY PAGE to Princess Natalie, DeeJ, and me, with links to all three of us.
2. You post on that APOLOGY page a Photo of you, UrAnusXX, and your Niece, CHICKY, and the 10 gallon Jello Mold you are going to make in honor of us. In Black Cherry, of course.
3. On that APOLOGY page you, UrAnusXX, and you, CHICKY, will promise that you will NEVER AGAIN offend Princess Natalie, DeeJ or me, and HUMBLE yourselves before us.
4. You will also post prominently on that APOLOGY page a Photo of you, UrAnusXX, and your Niece, CHICKY, SITTING in said 10 gallon Jello Mold. In Black Cherry, of course.
5. Also visible in that photo will be the DICTIONARY you are buying so you won't ever misspell again!
6. Optional (but VERY desirable) is a Photo of you, UrAnusXX, drowning your Niece,CHICKY, in said 10 gallons of Black Cherry Jello, but we all understand the need to suppress evidence.
7. You, UrAnusXX, will link to this APOLOGY Page from your index page.