Three guys walk into town. They go into a hotel and ask for a room they can share. The clerk has just the thing they want for thirty dollars. The clerk sends them to the room, takes out the ledger, and realizes that he made a mistake. The room costs only twenty-five dollars. Now he has to divide five dollars evenly three ways. Can't be done. So the clerk pockets two dollars, tells the guys that he made a three dollar mistake and gives them each a single. Now, each man paid only nine dollars for his share of the room. Nine times three equals twenty seven, plus the two in the clerk's pocket equals twenty nine.
Where's the other dollar?
*****************************************************************
In Jamaica,
if you drop a steel ball weighing five pounds from a height of 45 inches,
will it fall more rapidly through water at 20 degrees Fahrenheit or water
at 40 degrees Fahrenheit. Or will it make no difference?
*****************************************************************
There
is a thing that nothing is, and yet it has a name. It's sometimes tall and
sometimes short, joins our talks and joins our sports, and plays at every
game?
*****************************************************************
If it
takes six men six days to dig six holes, how long will it take one man to
dig half a hole?
*****************************************************************
What question
can you never answer "yes" to?
*****************************************************************
*****************************************************************
Carl Jones
introduced Roger Smith to his friend as his 'Uncle Roger'. Roger Smith introduced
Carl Jones to his friend as his 'Uncle Carl'. "If you are uncles to each
other," queried one of the friends, "you must also be nephews to each other."
"That's correct," replied Carl. Since there has been no breach of marriage
law, how can you explain such a relationship?
We are
little creatures; all of us have different features. One of us in glass
is set; one of us you'll find in jet. Another you may see in tin, and the
fourth is boxed within . If the fifth you should pursue, it can never fly
from you. What are we?
A fruit
farmer was waging war against the blackbirds that were constantly sampling
his cherry crop. One day Harry noticed 16 blackbirds dining on his favorite
cherry tree. Determined to teach the birds a lesson they wouldn't soon forget,
he got out his shotgun and blasted away at them. Although the farmer only
managed to hit one of the birds, he did succeed in blowing it clean out
of the tree. How many birds are now left in the tree?
King Fred
loved the sight of women so much he decided to pass a law that would ensure
the birth of even more females. The law he decreed stated that every couple
was to have children until they had a boy, and then they were to stop procreating.
What effect would this have on the proportion of males and females to the
population?
Dandy
Dan is a used car salesman. He sold half his cars plus one more to his first
customer of the day. To the second customer, he sold half of the remainder
plus one more. To the third customer, he sold half the remainder plus one
more; and to the fourth customer, he sold half the remainder plus one more.
Dan was now the proud salesman on an empty car lot. How many cars did Dan
have for sale at the start of this fantastic day?
*****************************************************************
*****************************************************************
Even if
they are starving, natives living in the Arctic will never eat a penguin's
egg. Why not?
Before
Mount Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain on Earth?
*****************************************************************
A man
lives on the 45th floor of an apartment building. On rainy days, he takes
the elevator to and from his apartment, but on sunny days, he will take
the elevator from his apartment to the lobby but walks up the 45 flights
of stairs when he returns home. Why doesn't he just take the elevator
all the time?
*****************************************************************
Before
airplanes were invented, a suspension brides was being planned to span a
violent river. There was no way a boat could carry the suspension cables
across the violent water, and the bridge could not be built until the cables
were in place. The builders decided to hold a contest to solve the problem.
The contest was won by a young boy. Shortly thereafter the cables spanned
the water. What contest could have been used to solve this problem?
*****************************************************************
*****************************************************************
How can you physically stand behind your friend as he/she physically stands behind you?
Imagine John, a party
magician, is carrying three pieces of gold each piece weighing one kilogram.
While taking a walk he comes to a bridge which has a sign posted saying the
bridge could hold only a maximum of 80 kilograms. John weighs 78 kilograms
and the gold weighs three kilograms. John reads the sign and still safely
crossed the bridge with all the gold. How did he manage?
He has married many women,
but has never been married. Who is he?
*****************************************************************
Forward
I am heavy, but backward I am not. What am I?
*****************************************************************
While
playing with a metal washer shaped like a ring, Arna accidentally pushed
it on her finger too far and couldn't get it off. Trying to remove it
using soap and water didn't work. The hospital sent her to a service station
thinking they could cut the metal. Unfortunately, the ring was made with
a specially hardened steel so it couldn't be cut. Just then Alfred arrived
on the scene and suggested an easy way to remove the washer in just a
few minutes. What was his solution?
If you have 10 trees and you need to make 5 rows of 4. How do you do it?
*****************************************************************
*****************************************************************
Bill was
on a grueling trip from his hometown of Squaresville to the town of Roundsville.
Bill and his bicycle were able to hitch a ride to the town of Triangleville,
which was exactly halfway to Roundsville. The ride lasted one hour, and
was ten times faster than if Bill had cycled the same distance. When Bill
got out of the car at Triangleville he noticed his tire was flat, which
meant walking the rest of the way to Roundsville. Walking took him twice
as long as cycling. When Bill finally reached Roundsville, he repaired his
bicycle tire and rode the entire distance home to Squaresville. How much
time did each trip take and which of the two was faster?
A man
on his deathbed informs his three sons that he will leave them his horses.
To the eldest son he leaves half of his horses. To his second son he leaves
one third of them, and to his youngest, he leaves one ninth. After he passes
away, the three sons went to get their horses, but discovered there were
17 animals. They did not want to sell or kill any of the horses, an they
could not think of a way to divide the horses exactly as their father wished.
Just then their next door neighbor came riding along on his horse and listened
to their problem. Immediately the neighbor thought of a way to divide the
horses just as their father had wished. What was his easy solution?
*****************************************************************
If you
have an open topped box that is 5 cm x 5 cm x 5 cm (Capacity: 125 cubic
centimeters) Inside the box is a steel ball-bearing that is 25 cubic centimeters
in size. Next to the box is a two liter pail filled with mercury. How many
cubic centimeters of mercury would you have to pour into the box to completely
submerge the ball bearing?
You are on a ship, over the side hangs a rope ladder with half meter rungs. The tide rises a half meter per hour. At the end of five hours, how much of the ladder will remain above the water assuming that nine rungs were above the water when the tide began to rise?
Doctor Jokes ¦ Rude and Off-color Jokes ¦ Lawyer Jokes ¦ Blonde Jokes ¦ Computer Jokes ¦ Pet Jokes ¦ Flying and Airplane Jokes ¦ School and Teacher Jokes ¦ More Dirty Jokes ¦ Jokes about Kids ¦ Old Folks Jokes ¦ Police Jokes ¦ Accountant Jokes ¦ Bars, Pubs, and Drinking Jokes ¦ Male Bashing Jokes ¦ Female Bashing Jokes ¦ Redneck Jokes ¦ Viagra Jokes ¦ Executive and Secretary Jokes ¦ Sport Jokes ¦ Fishing Jokes ¦ Wedding/Marriage/Anniversary Jokes ¦ Alien Jokes ¦ Golf Jokes ¦ Religious Jokes ¦ Dining-Out and Restaurant Jokes ¦ Guzzlers Gazette XXXX E-mail
LINKS
TO SISTER SITES
The Shopping
Mall ¦ Computer
World ¦ Music
World ¦ Sports
World ¦ Rude
Picture Jokes ¦ Video
World ¦
Hypermart 1 ¦ Hypermart
2 ¦ Literature
World ¦
CompServ
¦
