Caption Comments: Great use of a standard Lassie cliché and then twisting it to the darkest corners of a sick mind. BRAVO!
Capper Comments: The early memories I have, after becoming a
CT! regular back in the fall of '97, are those of awe and wonder over Artanas'
capping abilities. The man is quick-witted, well-versed in pop culture,
and has had to have won several spelling bees. Nothing Art produces ever
seems like a rough draft. The guy is a Master Craftsman and comes backed
with Sears 100% guarantee!
Artanas was also the first gallery owner who liked what he saw in a
couple of my crude captions to put them on display. Knowing that my brand
of humor appealed to -somebody- kept me coming back to Caption This! Thanks,
Art.
Artanas:
"Huh? What's that Lassie? Timmy's getting laid?!"
Caption Comments: Shades of a classic Hollywood line. I laughed my ass off at this one.
Capper Comments: The thing that stands out in my mind about Art's caps, is how well he conveys emotion in them. You can almost see/hear/feel the emotion that the poor sap in the picture is feeling. It's that wonderful use of emotion that raises Art's caps from the 'yeah, that was pretty funny' realm, to the the "HOLY SHIT! I GOTTA CHANGE MY UNDERWEAR!" plateau.
Artanas:
"What are they gonna do, arrest me?"
"For chrissakes Bob, stop doing that"
Caption Comments: Typical Artanas. Almost like a car crash you just can't seem to top staring at.
Capper Comments: Art has a style of capping that somehow just draws you in. It's kinda like reading a two-three line story. Art has some of the funniest stuff on the board. In my mind Art is one of the 'Cap Legends'.
Artanas:
Zuni: Libra. Enjoys terrorizing females, scampering, lurking under stools. Dislikes court-ordered anger management meetings. Seeks wood into same...
Caption Comments: The best I've seen this year.
The perfect caption.
A feared demon from Hell being heckled
Capper Comments: I met Artanas not too long after I started capping.
He was one of the original "all-nighters"
I immediately began saving his caps, as is evident in the early archives,
and spelled his name wrong for at least 3 months on my pages.
He never complained (or noticed)
There's a sense of humor for ya' or apathy....
He blew me away with the layout of his gallery and pages.
Artanas:
"Pinny makes quilts!" "Shut up!" "He wears a dress!" "Silence!" "Pinny's into naughty fabrics!" "That's it!"
Caption Comments: So quick and hilarious, I don't know, it just hits me right every time I read it. Art's got a horde of hilarious caps, it's needless to torture to pick one above the rest. But this is one I think everyone can get a kick out of. No backstory, no references, no prior thread knowledge needed. Kick back and enjoy.
Capper Comments: He is the King of Caption This! Art started off as a regular-albeit-hilarious Captioneer, but quickly distinguished himself as the guy in it for the long run. He's there virtually every night, whenever his real life doesn't obstinately interfere. More than being possibly the most revered Captioneer there is, he's a fountain of useless knowledge--possibly only overshadowed by TravisBickle in obscurity knowledge, Art actually remembers the crappy toys I talk about on CT! Hail to the King!
Artanas:
and remember, hdjadasdask is free!
Caption Comments: Art can take a nothing grab and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile! What, what are you looking at?! Not here, over at the caption, It's Damn Funny! Maybe it's just the word 'missy' that gets me, I fondly remember another cap (by Art) that always has me equally in stitches where the character says "That's 'mister' flaccid to you missy!"
Capper Comments: There are a few cappers who I especially like to cap with because they add an energy to Caption This that makes the whole experience more fun. Art isn't one of those cappers, but I think he has one chained up in his crawl space or something, so it provides the same effect.
Artanas:
"Oooo that Barbie! Posing around in that ......ungodly way....I'll get you missy!"
Caption Comments: This is possibly the most demented thing I've ever seen. I opened doors with a pair of salad tongs for three weeks after Art made this cap, for fear of grabbing a doorknob that had been cleaned with an old man's ass. This is the cap that convinced me Art had moved over to the Dark Side.
Capper Comments: Artanas is one bad, double-barrelled motherfucker! Don't you mess wit him, you hear? Art is a King Hell Phat capper with a whole closet full of axes to grind. I also think he may have gone slightly insane about ten months into our seven year capping journey. It's hard to tell, reports from the field are often garbled and soaked in mustard. Art was one capper I've always loved to cap with, because if you want to get strange, there's no better capper to go toe to toe with than Hoiman Ventricle. Art never scratched his head and said "Huh?", he just came back with caps so strange and funny they curdled the milk in your fridge. Art's so amazingly popular on the CT because he knows how to make other cappers feel appreciated. No great cap goes unnoticed, and Art loves to take his favorite caps and run with them, turning them into threads that soon become damned institutions on the CT. So let's all lift up the sewer grates, fling open the asylum doors and give a big "Bappa! Dappa! Hooray!" for one hell of a capper and a great online drinking buddy to boot!
Artanas:
"Just cleaning the doorknobs, don't mind me...."
Caption Comments: Good God! I can read this one three times in a minute and laugh every time!
Capper Comments: I never get to cap with the guy, since he's never on while I'm even awake most of the time, but his caption gallery kicks serious ass, and his captions are among the best of them!
Artanas:
"Margot...uh...your spine's showing..." "I'm a Transformer! *Kerchunk*" "Yech!" "Kryptonite Pantybot, away!"
Caption Comments: I don't think that Robin Williams, Kevin Spacey, a dismembered head, and "full of goodness" have ever been, nor ever will be, found in the same category and made funny. That's what Artanas does best.
Capper Comments: Artanas just takes you places unheard of. Never a dull moment, no lag or lapse in wit. I often wind up staying up later than I should because of him. Brilliant sense of humor, can turn anything funny. Picks up on a gag in a second and runs off to play with his new toy.
Artanas:
Robin Williams in Seven... "Lookee in de box! Ho ho, it won't bite. Go on, open it Brad, it's full of goodness, oh yes"
Caption Comments: Just a cap that stuck with me while skimming
Art's
gallery. Funny as all hell, I can just hear Chris
Rock's voice, but I would have thought Richard
Gere would have been the last one he would have
called for help. Maybe he's Richards supplier.
Capper Comments: Artanas is the dark soul of the Captin This
page.
Since he's started his own cult, I've started
writing a preyer to him Artanis, who Art in
Capton This, hallowed by thy gallery, thy captions
come, thy will be done, on earth as in Dementia...
Artanas:
"Hep me, hep me. Richard Gere!"
Caption Comments: Hey, punchlines don't come much better than "There's an island on your head!"
Capper Comments: Nobody says things like "ack" and "feh" the way Art does. That's his thang. That's why we love him. Well, that's not the only reason we love him. And by we, I mostly mean me. Turn that first letter upside down there. Yeah, that's better. "That's why me love him." No, wait, now that sounds homoerotic. Oh, well. Guess I'll just have to just live with it that way.
Art and I truly bonded over, of all things, the fact that both of us had seen, and remembered, the obscure early-'80s killer rat movie "Of Unknown Origin". So if you ever see the two of us together, and Peter Weller or an actor who looks like him is in a screengrab and we start going off about SuperRat, we mean that movie. And Arty, I hereby declare that whenever you wanna say you're gonna tear up the town, phrase it like so: "Me and the boys, we're gonna go Peter Weller with a baseball bat!" Thank you.
Artanas:
"Did you hear that Jill?" "Huh?" "Somebody just yelled 'lil buddy'!" "Oh hush" "There it goes aga....ack! There's an island on your head!"
Capper Comments: Don't listen to a word Artanas says. He hasn't quite been right since that horrorshow he endured at Grenada. Oh, the dentists.
Capper Comments: Well, *this* is kinda a no-brainer. Artanas has been making me laugh since I first started capping for a basic and simple reason: sheer originality. Even using a thread, it's original. I sometimes find it very hard to believe that a person can think of things that funny that fast. He's *got* to plan these things out days in advance. Or he's in league with the Psychic USA hotline, one or the other.... What was the question again? Oh... Artanas. Funny guy.
Capper Comments: Other than a rather disturbing Amplewoman fetish, one of the funnier cappers around.
Capper Comments: I am always amazed at how Art can catalog the threads and run with them. He is a hillarious capper and shows brilliance every tim he shows up. The humor is subtile, but it makes me laugh.
Capper Comments: I don't get to cap with Art as much as I'd like, but he's always damned funny, and he's nice to me, which is always a plus.