| BACK |  |
NEXT |
| Volume 1 |
|
Don't forget Army Earth Day and do something excellent to help save the Planet. |
|
|
| Item:
The trip to Oregon to pay homage to the ManchuGuru
went well. We were only stopped once by a cop somewhere out in Montana.
Mr.Manchu took SunDanze out to fire loaded weapons and bravely stood behind
SunDanze and gave directions such as "No, a little more to the left..no,
left...left..." Due to the most excellent verbal instructions given by
Mr. Manchu, SunDanze hit everything in a fifty yhard radius and almost
got a few yhuppie hikers as an added bonus! No charges were pressed and
after the test results came back we were released shortly afterwards.
Vastly impressed by the politeness of the local police force, we extended
an open invitation for them to join the Yhards. A good time was had by
all as we toured the mountains, drove in circles, ate fresh grapes (and
homemade fry-bread) and got to play "where's the mustard bottle"
with AlphaDog. In addition, we got to meet the WolfHound although frankly
he really didn't make too much sense. (Something about a boat and a wrecked
truck that involved dynamite and fish was as close as we could figure out.)
Posh the guard Llamma provided an entertaining spectacle as he chased the
dog and the Wicked Witch of SD across the sheep fields. Mr. Manchu gave
us a tour of Command Central and provided killer tunes to listen to as
we sat up all night and discussed the State of the Union, the Deutsch
Mark, SpamFest 2000 and Inca astronomy. We didn't completely lose the brakes
on the Ram until we hit the North Dakota border. Thank goodness for Perkins.
Item: Grampa is gearing up to deliver his annual case of yellow grape-fruit tribute to SunDanzer. Anyone wishing to qualify for Sharpshooters Level 4, please let us know. The number of grapefruit is limited. Bring your own ammo, lhawn chairs, etc. and please, no empty propane tanks. The neighbors still cringe when they hear a loud noise. Jake the Alpha Dog will be here to provide delightfully amusing yet charming entertainment, so bring the cats. Hamsters welcome also. Item: We are now accepting applications for several positions within the ranks. If you think you would qualify...please send your resume to us. All applications must be in readable Esparanto. (Sorry, but the Legal Aid vacancy has already been filled.) Item: "...The V.V.A.B.S. iCorps, led by Elvis, finds as many of the anti-Yhard protesters & their cranky camper co-horts as possible and determines what these ghoats are up to in order to facilitate their complete and absolute defeat in the quickest manner possible with the least expenditure of sacred Yhard lives..." (Seen on a whall somewhere near a very popular tourist spot north of the Mhexican border.) Item: The Yhard mhowers are in for their annual Spring tune-up. All leaf blowers, mhowers and wheed whackers will be cleaned and returned as soon as the snow stops. Please keep your color-coded check-in tag as you REALLY want to get back what you turned in because seat adjustments are not planned. Remember, if the seat don't fit, you must acquit. Item: We would like to welcome Perps99 to our growing ranks. (Perps and Sun go way back.) So let's give him hand and make him feel at home. Item:
From the Atlanta Constitution, 8/15/95
Item: Be sure and grab your copy of the Yhard Easter Card here. Item: Whiches-r-Uhz are gearing up for the annual Easter Celebration. If you would like to attend the Great Chocolate Ceremony, please go here for a copy of the words.
|
 |
 |
HOME |
| Volume 2 of YhardNhews will hit the stands in a week or so. |
