Recommended Reading

• The Loving Dominant by John Warren

  • I have read many books on "how to" for D/s. No book combines the physical and mental/emotional aspects of D/s so well. And for D/s, the importance of emotions and feelings cannot be overstressed. The comprehensive treatise on safety deals with psychological safety as well as physical safety - something that, while desperately needed, has been overlooked in most other

• attempts at this very difficult subject. Yes, BDSM is a difficult undertaking as it requires not only deep knowledge but even deeper caring and ethics. Knowing that your Dominant is concerned and knowledgeable in, and for safety, will create a bond of trust. A big step for a lasting relationship! The section written BY a submissive is a stroke of genius for the purposes of providing the submissive POV. Imagine! a book that tries to teach the Dominant what a submissive sees and feels. Understanding the submissive mind is a powerful tool for a Dominant that truly cares.
   

• Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission by by Gloria G. Brame and Jon Jacobs

  • This book is WONDERFUL. I completely agree with every aspect of this book. It is so well written and so informative and accurate. I usually do not read BDSM books because so many books are filled with fantasy/nonsense. This book was refreshing.
     

• Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism by Philip Miller & Molly Devon

  • This book is wonderful for people with all levels of BDSM knowledge. It's a great way to get you and your partner on the same page as to what to expect when you play. This book offers well thought out opinions on, proper techniques, club etiquette, why we like what we do, and how to know when you're doing it correctly. Too many of us try to just "jump in" with little to no information. That's how people get physically and emotionally hurt. This book really helps people to have the best BDSM experience possible, weather it is beginning, intermediate, or advanced.. It's well written, casual and humorous too! I personally have recommended this book to hundreds of couples, and singles, with all levels of BDSM knowledge in the Washington Metro area and I know I will continue to do so for many more years to come.
     

• Erotic Surrender: The Sensual Joys of Female Submission by Claudia Varrin

  • Most D/s books are written by men - which is great, for the male perspective on what it means to be a Dom or to serve one. Books like "Different Loving" and "The Loving Dominant" are helpful how-to books on the technicalities of the lifestyle. This book fills a different need. Finally, Claudia Varrin provides a female perspective on what it means to live as a submissive in a D/s relationship. She writes from a heterosexual perspective, although her stories come from the heart of personal experience, and as such, apply universally. As a former Domme herself, she understands the significance of embracing a D/s lifestyle from both sides. There's no question this book will be most helpful for beginners and women still struggling to embrace the lifestyle. What i love most about it is her candid warmth of expression, her ability to make women feel comfortable in their desires to live a submissive life despite societal demands and internal conflicts with who we are supposed to be. Her personal examples and heartfelt advice are amusing and inspiring. I've read so many male-oriented, technique-driven books over the past year that Claudia's book was a welcomed breath of fresh air. It holds a permanent place on my shelf of favorites.
     

• SM 101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman

  • Midwest Book Review It goes by many names: bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadomasochism, and more. In Jay Wiseman's SM 101, the long-taboo subject of consensual sadomasochism is accurately, insightful presented in the context of adult human sexuality, experience and tradition for the interested non-specialist general reader. SM 101 surveys the entire spectrum of consensual sadomasochistic practices from from bondage, to spanking, to erotic role-playing, and more. Now in an expanded second edition, SM 101 includes a new chapter on starting and running sadomasochistic organizations and events for consenting adults. Greenery Press has an extensive title list in the area of human sexuality and maintains a site on the World Wide Web with a complete roster of their publications in various aspects of human sexuality and practices.