Quotes from Buffy the Vampire Slayer
ANYA
Anya: I swear, I am just trying to find my necklace.
Willow: Well, did you try looking inside the sofa in hell?
Anya: Listen, I have this little project I'm working on, and I heard you were the person to ask if--.
Willow: Yeah, that's me. Reliable dog-geyser-person.
Anya: What a day. Gimme a beer.
Bartender: ID. [Anya glares at him.]
Bartender: ID.
Anya: I'm eleven hundred and twenty years old! Just gimme a frickin' beer!
Bartender: ID.
Anya: [sigh] Gimme a Coke.
Anya: You know this isn't your world, right? I mean, you know you don't belong here.
Bartender: No. This is a dumb world. On my world, there are people in chains, and we can ride them like ponies.
Anya: Men *like* sports. I'm sure of it.
Xander: Yes. Men like sports. Men watch the action movie, they eat of the beef, and they enjoy to look at the bosoms. A thousand years of avenging our wrongs, and that's all you've learned?
Anya: You're going to die if you stay here.
Xander: I guess I might.
Anya: When I think that something could happen to you, it feels bad inside, like I might vomit.
Xander: Welcome to the world of romance.
Anya: It's horrible! No wonder I used to get so much work.
Anya: I have witnessed a millennium of treachery and oppression from the males of the species, and I have nothing but contempt for the whole libidinous lot of them.
Xander: Then why are you talking to me?
Anya: [sighs] I don't have a date for the prom.
Xander: Well, gosh, I wonder why not? It couldn't possibly have anything to do with your sales pitch.
Anya: Men are evil. Will you go with me?
Anya: Look, I know you find me attractive. I've seen you looking at my breasts.
Xander: Nothing personal, but when a guy does that, it just means his eyes are open.
Cordelia: I wish that Buffy Summers had never come to Sunnydale.
Anya: Done.
Cordelia: That would be cool. No wait, I wish Buffy Summers had never been born.
Anya: Done.
Cordelia: And I wish that Xander Harris never again knows the touch of a woman. And that Willow wakes up tomorrow covered in monkey hair.
Anya: Done.
Cordelia: In fact, I wish all men, except maybe the dumb and really beautiful kind, disappear off the face of the Earth. That would be so cool.
Anya: You trusting fool. How do you know the other world is any better than this?
Giles: Because it has to be.
Anya: You've never seen a demon.
Buffy: Uh, excuse me. Killing them professionally, four years running.
Xander: Jeez. You mean Oz just sent for his stuff and didn't even call her? That's pretty harsh.
Anya: I only wish I had my powers back. I'd liquify his entrails for her.
Xander: That's sweet.
Anya: Xander, you haven't been paying any attention to me tonight. Just peddling those processed food bricks. I don't know why.
Xander: Well, let me put it in a way you'll understand. Sell bars, make money. Take Anya nice places, buy pretty things.
Anya: That does make sense
Xander: How could you say I'm using you?
Anya: You don't care about what I think, you don't ask about my day.
Xander: You really did turn into a real girl, didn't you?
Anya: See? You make jokes during my pain.
Anya: This isn't a relationship. You don't need me. All you care about is lots of orgasms.
Xander: Okay, remember how we talked about private conversations? How they're less private when they're in front of my friends?
Spike: Oh, we're not your friends. Go on.
Giles: Please don't.
Giles: I need you to take Spike for a few days.
Xander: What?
Spike: What?
Anya: What?
Spike: I'm not stayin' with him.
Giles: I have a friend who's coming to town, and I'd like us to be alone.
Anya: Oh, you mean an orgasm friend?
Giles: Yes, that's exactly the most appalling thing you could have said.
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