Quotations

In June of 1987, men will begin talking about their feelings; women all over America will be sorry within minutes. - Nicole Hollander, Thinner Thighs for Everyone

Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry. - Mark Twain

We would often be sorry if our wishes were gratified. - Aesop

Affection is responsible for nine-tenths of whatever solid and durable happiness there is in our lives. - C. S. Lewis, The Four Loves

All the Constitution guarantees is the pursuit of happiness. You have to catch up with it yourself. - Ben Franklin

All who would win joy, must share it; happiness was born a twin. - Lord Byron

Before strongly desiring anything, we should look carefully into the happiness of its present owner. - Francois De La Rochefoucauld

Chastity is a monkish and evangelical superstition, a greater foe to natural temperance even than unintellectual sensuality; it strikes at the root of all domestic happiness, and consigns more than half of the human race to misery. - Shelley

Derive happiness in oneself from a good day's work, from illuminating the fog that surrounds us. - Henri Matisse

Friendship improves happiness, and abates misery, by doubling our joys, and dividing our grief. - Joseph Addison

Happiness is as a butterfly which when pursued is always beyond our grasp, but which if you will sit down quietly may alight upon you. - Nathaniel Hawthorne

Happiness is as a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but which if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you. - Nathaniel Hawthorne (1804-1864)

Happiness is different from pleasure. Happiness has something to do with struggling and enduring and accomplishing. - George Sheehan

Happiness is good health and a bad memory. - Ingrid Bergman (1917-1982)

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch. - Ogden Nash

Happiness is not a station you arrive at, but a manner of traveling. - Margaret Lee Runbeck

Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember. - Oscar Levant Happiness lies, first of all, in health. - George William Curtis

Humanity does not ask us to be happy. It merely asks us to be brilliant on its behalf. Survival first, then happiness as we can manage it. - Orson Scott Card; Ender's Game

I certainly wasn't happy. Happiness has to do with reason, and only reason earns it. What I was given was the thing you can't earn, and can't keep, and often don't even recognize at the time; I mean joy. - Ursula K. LeGuin

I have never been able to conceive how any rational being could propose happiness to himself from the exercise of power over others. - Thomas Jefferson

If what Proust says is true, that happiness is the absence of fever, then I will never know happiness. For I am possessed by a fever for knowledge, experience, and creation. - Anais Nin

It is only a poor sort of happiness that could ever come by caring very much about our own pleasures. We can only have the highest happiness such as goes along with being a great man, by having wide thoughts and much feeling for the rest of the world as well as ourselves. - George Eliot

Life's truest happiness is found in friendships we make along the way. - Unknown

Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose. - Helen Keller Misfortune, no less than happiness, inspires us to dream. - Honore De Balzac

No medicine cures what happiness cannot. - Gabrid Garcia Marquez

One ought to seek out virtue for its own sake, without being influenced by fear or hope, or by any external influence. Moreover, that in that does happiness consist. - Diogenes Laertius, Zeno

People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they're not on your road doesn't mean they've gotten lost. - H. Jackson Browne, P. S. I Love You

Remember happiness doesn't depend upon who you are or what you have; it depends solely on what you think. - Dale Carnegie

Sanity is a small price to pay for happiness. - Marabeth Madsen

Success in highest and noblest form calls for peace of mind and enjoyment and happiness which comes only to the man who has found the work he likes best. - Napoleon Hill

Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful. - Herman Cain

That's the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria! - Calvin, Calvin & Hobbes, Bill Watterson

That's the difference between me and the rest of the world. Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria! - Calvin, Calvin & Hobbes, Bill Watterson

The art of living does not consist in preserving and clinging to a particular mood of happiness, but in allowing happiness to change its form without being disappointed by the change; for happiness, like a child, must be allowed to grow up. - Charles Langbridge Morgan

The foolish person seeks happiness in the distance; the wise person grows it under his feet. - James Oppenheim

The grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for. - Allan K. Chalmers

The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved-loved for ourselves,or rather,loved in spite of ourselves - Victor Hugo

The greatest happiness of life it the conviction that we are loved -- loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves. - Victor Hugo

The ideals which have always shone before me and filled me with the joy of living are goodness, beauty, and truth. To make a goal of comfort or happiness has never appealed to me; a system of ethics built on this basis would be sufficient only for a herd of cattle. - Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

The secret of Happiness is Freedom, and the secret of Freedom, Courage. - Thucydides

There is no such thing as happiness, only lesser shades of melancholy. - Unknown

When once a man has made celebrity necessary to his happiness, he has put it in the power of the weakest and most timorous malignity, if not to take away his satisfaction, at least to withhold it. His enemies may indulge their pride by airy negligence and gratify their malice by quiet neutrality. - Samuel Johnson

When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us. - Helen Keller

Why not seize the pleasure at once, how often is happiness destroyed by preparation, foolish preparations. - Jane Austen

Yesterday is but a dream, tomorrow is only a vision. But today, well lived, makes every yesterday a dream of happiness, and every tomorrow a vision of hope. - The Sanskrit

All the taxes paid over a lifetime by the average American are spent by the government in less than a second. - Jim Fiebig

Don't be dismayed at good-byes. A farewell is necessary before you can meet again. And meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends. - Richard Bach

Few men during their lifetime come anywhere near exhausting the resources dwelling within them. There are deep wells of strength that are never used. - Richard Byrd

Give A Man A Fish, and You Feed him for a day. Teach him how to fish you feed him for a lifetime. - Unknown

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. - Chinese Proverb

The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money. - Mark Twain

To be ignorant of what happened before you were born is to be ever a child. For what is man's lifetime unless the memory of past events is woven with those of earlier times? - Marcus Tullius Cicero (106-43 BC), Orator

True friendship multiplies the good in life and divides its evils. Strive to have friends, for life without friends is like life on a desert island...to find one real friend in a lifetime is good fortune; to keep him is a blessing. - Baltasar Gracian

A sense of humor keen enough to show a man his own absurdities will keep him from the commission of all sins, or nearly all, save those that are worth committing. - Samuel Butler

Any man who has had the job I've had and didn't have a sense of humor wouldn't still be here. - Harry S. Truman

Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing. - Clive James

Economists state their GNP growth projections to the nearest tenth of a percentage point to prove they have a sense of humor. - Edgar R. Fiedler

Humor is a drug which it's the fashion to abuse. - William Gilbert

Humor is but another weapon against the universe. - Mel Brooks

Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away, and a sunny spirit takes their place. - Mark Twain

Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit. - Aristotle (284-322 B.C.)

Love is an attachment to another self. Humor is a form of self-detachment -- a way of looking at one's existence, one's misfortune, or one's discomfort. If you really love, if you really know how to laugh, the result is the same: you forget yourself. - Claude Roy

Love is my Sword, Goodness my Armor, And Humor my Shield. - Unknown, epitaph for a loved one Nothing spoils a romance so much as a sense of humor in the woman. - Oscar Wilde

There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. - Will Rodgers

Where humor is concerned there are no standards -- no one can say what is good or bad, although you can be sure that everyone will. - John Kenneth Galbraith

You are not angry with people when you laugh at them. Humor teaches them tolerance. - W. Somerset Maugham

Egotism is the anesthetic that dulls the pain of stupidity. - Frank Leahy

Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped. - Elbert Hubbard

I can't remember anything without a sadness so deep that it hardly becomes known to me, so deep that its tears leave me a spectator of my own stupidity. - John Lennon in a note to Stuart Sutcliffe (circa 1961)

If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out? - Will Rogers (1879-1935)

Never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by stupidity. - Nick Diamos Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. - Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say that there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe. - Frank Zappa

The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits - Anonymous There are only two truly infinite things, the universe and stupidity. And I am unsure about the universe. - Albert Einstein

There are only two ways by which to rise in this world, either by one's own industry or by the stupidity of others. - Jean de LaBruyere (1645-1696)

Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; I'm not sure about the universe. - Albert Einstein

With stupidity the gods themselves struggle in vain. - Friedrich von Schiller

You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public. - Scott Adams, The Dilbert Future "Well," Brahma said, "even after ten thousand explanations, a fool is no wiser, but an intelligent man requires only two thousand five hundred." - The Mahabharata.

Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius -- and a lot of courage -- to move in the opposite direction. - E. F. Schumacher

Efficiency is intelligent laziness. - David Dunham

Our worst enemies here are not the ignorant and simple, however cruel; our worst enemies are the intelligent and corrupt. - Graham Greene, The Human Factor (1978)

Quality is never an accident; it is always the result of intelligent effort. - John Ruskin

The meta-Turing test counts a thing as intelligent if it seeks to devise and apply Turing tests to objects of its own creation. - Lew Mammel, Jr.

To be able to fill leisure intelligently is the last product of civilization, and at present very few people have reached this level. - Bertrand Russell (1872-1970)

And in knowing that you know nothing, that makes you the smartest of all. - Socrates

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

Most of us would like to be smarter than we are, stronger than we are, richer than we are, but we don't feel all that comfortable with people who are. - Mickey Manfield

Natives who beat drums to drive off evil spirits are objects of scorn to smart Americans who blow horns to break up traffic jams. - Mary Ellen Kelly

None of us is as smart as all of us. - Phil Condit

People who are funny and smart and return phone calls get much better press than people who are just funny and smart. - Howard Simons, "The Washington Post"

Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have, which once you have got it you may be smart enough to see is what you would have wanted had you known. - Garrison Keillor

Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible. - Doug Larson

The typical rock fan is not smart enough to know when he is being dumped on. - Frank Zappa

There will be a lot more winners than there will be losers, because the internet is a great cost reducer in distribution and transactions. Bill Gates refers to it as a friction-free kind of economy. I don't think it's a panacea. You have to be an exceptionally smart marketer to succeed in this new world. Assemble together all of the notions that make marketing part art, part science. - John Doerr

You know how I'm smart? I got people around me who know more than I do. - Louis B. Mayer

A strong conviction that something must be done is the parent of many bad measures. - Daniel Webster

Children aren't happy without something to ignore, And that's what parents were created for. - Ogden Nash

Fun is our philosophy. We're not angry and we like our parents. - Mark McGrath; Sugar Ray Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others. - Cicero (106-43 B.C.)

I got a fortune cookie that said, "To remember is to understand." I have never forgotten it. A good judge remembers what it was like to be a lawyer. A good editor remembers being a writer. A good parent remembers what it was like to be a child. - Ann Quindlen

It is always preferable to visit home with a friend. Your parents will not be pleased with this plan, because they want you all to themselves and because in the presence of your friend, they will have to act like mature human beings ... - Playboy, January 1983

Our parents were of Midwestern stock and very strict. They didn't want us to grow up to be spoiled and rich. If we left our tennis racquets in the rain, we were punished. - Nancy Ellis, George Bush's sister

The best inheritance a parent can give to his children is a few minutes of their time each day. - M. Grundler

The capacity of human beings to bore one another seems to be vastly greater than that of any other animals. Some of their most esteemed inventions have no other apparent purpose, for example, the dinner party of more than two, the epic poem, and the science of metaphysics. - H. L. Mencken

Those who educate children well are more to be honored than parents, for these only gave life, those the art of living well. - Aristotle (284-322 B.C.)

Trust each other again and again. When the trust level gets high enough, people transcend apparent limits, discovering new and awesome abilities for which they were previously unaware. - David Armistead

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