"nervous excitability"
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april 30 thru may 2
NERVOUS EXCITABILITY.
I heard about 500 people hit the site Friday trolling the Laughlin story,
(owing to actin de grace Mrs.Brady.) Obviously then - a "drug crazed" wacko
from "the party" killed JBR so Patsy can now take a long sitz bath and
relax. I hear some net-chat goes thatta way.
"Eprouver la patience de quelqu'un" - why this means - "to try someone's
patience." All we know is that the gendarmes BUNGLED, even more than we
thought.
FRiday nite's movie was "the Siege." I didn't catch the title of Saturdays
movie but was astounded that some mustachioed JACKASS would put his plastic
chair RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY CELL DOOR to watch it. (See above French sentence!)
BY the way (en passant) les JACKASS happens to have been the dullard that
AL was stuck with for a cellie. I will tell you'd vais vous dire) that
les jackass compounded things 100 fold by continually guffawing with nervous
false laughter.
"To do one's ut most" equals... "faire tout son possible" - and that's
what I been doing this weekend on les AL thing. Okay. So, I've written
little note about it and paid to mail them to about a dozen Colorado places
such as les HARD ROCK CAFE (denver) .... BARTS CD CELLAR (boulder) ....
Synergy (denver) .... the Aggie Theater (ft. collins) ... THE BLUEBIRD
THEATER (denver) ..... RODENT RECORDS (arvada) ....Fillmore Auditorium
(denver) .... J+B Productions - (Woodland park NR Colo Springs). ect. Information
is a whip AND I done cracked it -okay. People want to PUSH negativity AWAY,
see but I have to coat it with kooky goo and shove it back. MUST. Jeezy
Weezy done said so. It's in my anxious but tired blood.
Baudelaire said America was POE's PRISON. YOu have seen les blueprints
to mine, and amongst you in netnutland we now have a DEBBIE from Connecticut.
AND when she punches up les blueprints on this site she sees her son's
cell which neighbors mine. Her son DAVE is an incredible gossip. He got
eine letter from Lil Debbie and folded it to show me one item, "I have
seen the website." ect. What static shall spew forth now.
"To wriggle out of a difficulty" in other words is "se trer adroitement
d'embarras." But here it's usually WRENCHING not wriggling.
If I could have gum I suppose I'd chow it trying to relate to you that
when I was reading (about les civel war) late Saturday night I came to
realize that I was MOSTLY remembering ANY late nite nursing home body pick-up
call. The hallucinating exhaustion. The smells. The low lighting. The clanging
(accidentally) of my gurney against the beds of the barely LIVING in the
same room as the deceased. And how many times did I come back in following
weeks to the very same ROOMS sometimes only to snap on more gloves.
What would YOU do to get your affairs in order if your end were near?
And the same question again if you were only going to be half-dead? I didn't
even take a second pair of pants to Cananda. But, the way things turned
out, I ended up buying some jeans while there. (Store clerks glad when
my nervous carcass left the shop.) I kept on STAYING in Vancouver so I
also ended up buying a little radio at a pawn shop down the street from
my hotel. The radio sucked. I later wrote "TEMPORARY COBAIN" on that pawnery's
doorjamb.
But I left all my belongings behind in San Francisco. My typewriter.
The VCR I got after my mother died. Clothes. Whatever. The idea was that
I couldn't hold onto it in S.F. anyway. I was looking elswhere. I Also
left behind a huge spray painting I did on a piece of plastic. I'd written
in green, "I CAN LIVE AS A HEAD ON A TABLE." Writing that AND leving it
behind, well, that is part of MY answer to the question of half baked final
affairs. Eventually everything drops. Pushed down by swirling clouds of
despair that FORCE tense action.
J.T.Colfax
p.s. There were not even any mountains in sight all weekend. the relentless
foggy rainy gloom continues. Even Dep. Roinson was complaining about it.
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