"there is further to go"

may 12 I remember a while back someone asked me via e-mail if I knew anything about les rapist extrodinaire, M. FALCON. I didn't really. But he's back in this pod -(in my old room downstairs in fact) and I do swear he's AWARE of me. Looking at me. Could he have been plugging in here while he was in work release? Sure, he could. As for MORE on the ever shrinking world. Dave, from the cell next door, left this pod and transferred to INMATE WORKERS. His stepmother in Connecticut has been drinking and looking IN here. Tonight, a whole group of people sitting in front of the T.V. - none of whom I'd ever spoken to - asked me if it was true I had a map of to les jail. I FORGET that the whispering goes on after so long. No one hardly ever says NOTHING to me - yet - they KNOW little bitsy pieces. Oh, my defense mechanisms. I pulled out from under my mattress today, some magazine pages I've been saving. They got stirred into les mix overnight due to a LATE NIGHT strip search / room wrecking festival. What I am looking at is 3 pages of advertising from a 1967 issue of NAT. GEOGRAPHIC. The point is that you should attendez "EXPO 67" in MONTREAL. Oh my yes, "it's 135 acres of enchantment featuring an old French Canadian Village." Les theme for the EXPO67 was "MAN AND HIS WORLD." MORE, it says: "Boulevards, sidewalk cafes, flower stalls and kiosks create an enchantment about the city, reminiscent of Paris." What I am looking at is three pages aside- over there near les toilette, the above is all I saved them for, don't need them anymore. ONWARDS ....mine eels.... clickita clackita ....onwards.... AND so, I buy beer in the club car for a  teenage couple who have stowed away. STOP. HOW CUTE. STOP. THey'll take the beer but they think I'm a creep. STOP. I can't relax. STOP. BUT what a WAD of money my credit card has supplied. STOP. Somewhere around 9 or 10 p.m. the next day, les train pulls in ot downtown Seattle. STOP. This is NOT where I think I'm ultimately going - but - to avoid getting wherever THAT is - VANCOUVER... MONTREAL?... I'm surely agreeable to staying here a night or two. STOP. I give a bum a quarter since he initiates contact I ask about a hotel. STOP. He points out one very nearby. STOP. Maybe it was snowing, maybe just freezing - I see the hotel is too expensive but I MUST get entombed - away, away, away down away from YOU. STOP. THe consequence of this behavior - this spending of $100 for a room - is that need not feel YOUR eyes on me. STOP. I was miserable but neanmdins (never the less) the bed was comfortable. STOP. The misery at this point was already so intense it was difficult even to maneuver les NECK. STOP. WAsh les blue jeans in les bathtub. STOP. Sit on them as you soak. STOP. For there is further to go. STOP. J.T.Colfax [email protected]   current | 1999 | 1998 | colfax diaries