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1.
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You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to
the bathroom and stop to check your e-mail.
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2.
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You get a tattoo that reads "This
person best viewed with Netscape Navigator 1.1 or
higher."
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3.
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You turn off your modem and get
this awful empty feeling.
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4.
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You spend half of the plane trip
with your laptop on your lap checking
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your e-mail and your child in
the overhead compartment.
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5.
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You laugh at people with 2400-baud
modems.
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6.
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You start using smileys in your
snail mail.
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7.
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Your hard drive crashes. You haven't
logged in for two hours. You start to twitch.
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You pick up the phone and manually
dial your ISP's access number.
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You try to hum songs to communicate
with the modem. And you succeed!
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8.
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You find yourself typing "com"
after every period when using a word processor.com.
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9.
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You refer to going to the bathroom
as downloading.
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10.
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You start introducing yourself
as "Tony at 1-1-Net dot net dot com".
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11.
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All of your close friends have
an @ in their names.
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12.
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You can't call your mother...She
doesn't have a modem.
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13.
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You check your mail. It says "no
new messages." So you check it again.
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14.
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Your phone bill comes to your
doorstop in a box.
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15.
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You don't know what sex three
of your closest friends are because they
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have neutral nicknames and you
never have bothered to ask.
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16.
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You move into a new house and
decide to Netscape before you landscape.
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17.
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You tell the cab driver you live
at http://1000.edison.garden/house/brick.html.
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18.
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You start tilting your head sideways
to smile.
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