Home · Thoughts · Dates · Policy
Friends ·
I am the type of person that treasures all the friendships I have. When a friend needs help for any reason, I will do what I can to help that person. It is rare for me to say "no" to a friend because of how much importance that I put on friendship. It is also rare for me to have to choose between one friend over another for any reason. I will usually see what the topic is that is being disputed and decide which side I agree with, however there are times that I will just stay neutral because I don't want to take sides.
In the past I have told friends when he/she has crossed the line, and that I disagree with what he/she is doing. This past weekend was the start of something new. For every friend I have ever had, I have been able to become friends with his/her family. So in turn I have developed multiple friendships at the same time. Currently I have been pushed into a corner and I am afraid that the result of this could end up bad, if I stay in this corner too much.
This past weekend a parent of a friend verbally attacked me. The attack is because of his/her beliefs dealing with a current friend. Unfortunately this part of a friend is being highly prejudicial against this specific friend because of his/her history. This parent of a friend did become annoyed at me when he/she told me about the past of this specific friend and I didn't care because I already knew about the history. This parent of a friend has told me that this specific friend is "nothing but trouble" because of his/her past and believes that I shouldn't be around him/her because of this. This parent of a friend also told me of things that were just rumors, but told me the things believing that they were facts.
I am not the type of person that takes threats well. In the past I have had others threaten me and not get anywhere with the threats. This threat that I received this past weekend will be no different. The threat is to decide a side to be on. The threat is to decide which friendship I hold the most trust in, and whether I can live with the decision. In other words, my judgment has been challenged and the parent of a friend believes I will obey him and stay away from the specific friend. I have news for him/her.
I would normally agree with this person, however when it is something that makes no sense; I will not agree to it. Where the primary reason for this person to want me to stay away from the specific friend is because of his/her history. I am unable to agree with this person because I see him/her being prejudice. I am not a prejudice person, and I will fight for things I believe in. Where this type of threat has been issued to me as a prejudicial thing, I will be going against that prejudice.
I will be doing what I feel is right. It is rare for me to stand up against that specific family, however the prejudice that that specific family feels towards the specific friend is just wrong. I will not stand by and have a friend have a target on his/her back, and I will force people to realize that some histories should stay in the past. If a person is expected to get over things that happen in the past, the person cannot do this when others keep using that past against the person. I never saw this type of prejudice before because no one had attacked me verbally in this fashion before.
Now I have been preparing myself for a war. I was not involved in the dispute before because it was never brought to my attention that this type of thing was happening. Now that I have been brought in by accident through the verbal assault, there will be a rift in the friendship with that family with me. I will not stand by and allow a friend to be forced to relive his/her past because others won't let it die. I have always been a protective person for my friends and family, and in doing so became a powerful ally at the same time. The specific family is now going to realize that I will not standby and allow this prejudice to continue.
Many people would say that he/she would weigh out the different friendships and decide from that which side to go on. I am not that way, however that was how I looked at things during my depression. That is exactly why I always tried to stay neutral through any disagreement by any of my friends. It has been mentioned to me that there is a time that I will need to do things for myself, and not consider who may get hurt in the process. It has been mentioned that I need to do things for myself, regardless of what others think. This is going to be the first time that I don't care what other people think, especially where it is the right thing to do.
As many of you can see through this website, I am able to fight in a verbal fashion regardless of the topic. This fight/war (depending on person who says what it is) will be the first time that I have gone against this specific family on anything. Many people have told me, even this specific family, which I shouldn't take any "bull" from anyone and should use my backbone when I disagree with something. I have used my backbone once in a while and yet to use it to my fullest ability. This time will be the first time that I try to do that from the start.
Where I am facing a form of prejudice, I will be going by whatever my instincts tell me. I will be doing what I feel is right, regardless of what anyone thinks my reasoning is. When a person is trying to get over something awful from his/her past, it is impossible when others will keep reminding that person of the past. This prejudice that has formed because of the past is the reason why I have been involved. I probably would have never seen this type of thing from the specific family if the verbal assault never happened, however since it has I will be involved. I couldn't believe the verbal assault when it happened, however now I am glad that fate has decided that I needed to see it.
Being involved in this fight will be the first time that my family will see me do something that they wouldn't do. I know that many people feel that any form of prejudice is wrong, and will not tolerate it in his/her household. I also know that with most people you wouldn't try to fight against a family that you have grown up with, unless it was necessary. I also know that when this fight starts up that I will be asked to step aside by the specific family because they won't want to fight about this type of thing with me. With the friendship that I have within that family, the family will want me to be clear of the fight. I know that the friendship that I have within that family will be stretched further than what many people would be comfortable with, however I don't have a problem with that. I am doing what I feel is right, and will cause any conflicts that are necessary to stop this prejudice.
I know that it is more than one family that I will have to deal with, however this specific family should have more compassion than what it currently has shown. Where this specific family has told me to choose sides (indirectly), I will be choosing the side that I feel is right. When anyone tells me that I have to sacrifice a friendship because he/she says so, I will take that as a personal attack against my personal judgment. I will not respond properly to threats of this type. I will fight back against anyone who threatens me, and I will do this because no one has the power to force me to do something like that. No one can force me to do something like that because I feel that it is wrong for me to do something of those sorts.
Friendships are mainly based upon trust between you and the other person. When people try to tell you that the trust that you have with a friend is wrong, many people will want a good amount of proof of it. In my case the proof that was brought to me was just a bunch of prejudicial things. Where prejudicial things are wrong, in the first place, I decided right away that I wasn't going to listen to the person. I do need to find out how much of the specific family is prejudice against my friend, however that can be found out easily enough. When I am able to see how many people I am actually fighting against, I am able to prepare better for the war against the prejudice stuff.
I will not standby and allow this prejudice to happen. I didn't see the prejudice in the past because I had no reason to be involved. Now I am a friend with the person that the prejudice is about, and the verbal attack that I received on the weekend has involved me. Hopefully it is just the parents in the family that is being prejudice because it would be easier to fight the prejudice of parents than the kids themselves. Although I still don't know how much of the family that the prejudice is coming from, I do know that I will not back down from what I believe is right.
I know that the specific family will feel that I am fighting against them for a different reason. The family may try to have my family get me out of the "line of fire" with the prejudice. If my family is involved in anyway I can honestly say that they will find out that I will not be removed. Everyone that knows me knows that when my mind is made up about something that I will do whatever is necessary to do what I believe is right. This is how I can become a power ally, and this is why many people have problems when he/she becomes the enemy.
I am true to my word, regardless of the situation. If I realize that I was wrong, I will emit to my faults. If I feel that someone is being mistreated, regardless of what the reasons behind it, I will make others realize my point of view. For a situation like this one dealing with prejudice, I will be involved until the prejudice is removed. This will be a long battle and I will not back-down from the fight. This is probably the only time that I could be asked from both sides to back-down, and I still won't back-down. Prejudicial stuff shouldn't exist in the world, and I won't stand by when I have the ability to help stop the prejudice.
I can honestly say that this prejudicial stuff that I will be confronting against the specific family is the first time in a long time that I have felt that I can make a difference. Many other times I have known that it was a losing battle, however this time I know I can make a difference. It may be a small difference, however it is a difference nonetheless. I know that the community may feel the same way that the specific family feels about the specific friend, however that will not stop me from becoming involved. If my destiny was to stand aside, then the verbal assault I received this past weekend would not have happened.
I will not sacrifice any friendships when I am threatened to do so. I have never done that in the past, and I am not going to start now. Although I may not be welcome in certain households when I start to fight back against that prejudicial things, I know that I will be doing what I believe is right. It is wrong to do the prejudicial comments that have been done towards my friend, and I will stand up for him/her when anyone does such things around me. Some people do make jokes about the past and have yet to say the jokes to me. I can honestly say that any of those people that do those jokes around me will realize that I am not to be tested.
There will be many people that will be confused to why I will be involved in this fight. Many of them will be my family members, and others will be the ones that have been prejudice against my friend and his/her family. I know that many people will try to have me removed from the "line of fire" because many people will feel that I have no reason to be involved into the fight. I would have to disagree with anyone that would think that way. When something like prejudice is being involved to cause others pain, for any reason, anyone that can help fight it should fight it. The past can never be conquered if everyone keeps doing a form of prejudicial actions to remind us of the past.
In this case, the past needs to be removed from everyone's eyes. When a victim of something in the past is able to get over the past, then the public shouldn't have any reason to continue to remind that person of that past. With people constantly being prejudice against anyone with a bad history/past, the chances to have peace are slim. I would prefer to have everyone happy, however to do so means that the prejudice needs to end. To have the prejudice to end, the fight/war need to end with it. Time is the only thing that can predict when that can/will happen. Hopefully with having myself as part of the fight/war, I can help people see why it is wrong to do the prejudicial things that have been done already.
I have never seen such prejudice before in my life. Hell, I have seen a white person call a basketball team of black guys the "n" word before because the white guy was pissed off at a referee's call against him. The prejudice that is being done towards my friend and his/her family takes prejudicial stuff to a new level. For some reason people seem to look at the worst things in people and do not let those things go. This is why prejudice still exists, and why I will be standing on the side I believe is right.
Regardless of the time that it takes to make others see that the prejudice is wrong, I am willing to do it. I feel strongly that this prejudice can be removed, but only when those that are holding the prejudice see why it is wrong to feel the way that they do. I will be involved in this fight because I have been told to do something I didn't believe was right. I will do what is right, regardless of how many friends that I have to go against to do it. Everyone knows that I am protective over anyone that is a friend or family member, and they also know that I will do what I feel is right.
When anyone does anything that I consider a threat, I will respond in my fashion. My fashion has always been to go against whatever the threat was, and this time I have been put against a family that I consider long time close friends. This will be the first time that people see me fight against these people, and I hope that my family respects my judgment enough to stay out of it. If my family decides to "butt-in" and tell me that I am wrong, my family will realize that I will consider them the enemy. I will have my fight against my family if they seem to agree with the prejudice that is around my friend and his/her family.
I am not a person to take lightly. I do receive a lot of "bull" from a lot of people. I usually don't do anything about that "bull" however after time a lot of it becomes too much to not do anything about. I will do what I feel is right, regardless of who I have to fight against to do it. The dedication that I will be showing when I am fighting back against this prejudice is exactly what helps me become the powerful ally. This is why many of my friends like it when I agree with him/her and I am willing to fight on his/her side. When I believe in the fight, I will do whatever I can to make others see why my side is right.
© COPYRIGHT 2004