I scribbled these thoughts down as I walked 2 the library ... late March 2010 ...
It seems 2 me that true self-esteem ought NOT 2 depend on things that some people have while
others do not. I am talking about physical attractiveness, intelligence or achievements etc
It is hard 2 get at the true source of esteem without getting all spiritual - qualities such
as compassion, wisdom, forgiveness which we all potentially possess ... there was a good
point in there somewhere ...
Consider the case of you going blind - would looks matter then?
A few links:
Search 4 true self esteem
That alone is heaps 2 read ...
Self esteem ought not 2 depend on physical attractiveness, intelligence etc
A spiritual perspective on this issue
Found this site from an earlier search
This site is spot on - 'fake self esteem' comes from external approval
Traits of healthy self-esteem also makes good points
People with healthy self-esteem accept themselves for whom they are now and where they are in life. They love and accept others as they are � they truly are capable of loving others unconditionally. They don�t have an inner need to change anyone else. They understand that they can only change themselves. Therefore they continually work on improving themselves � because they understand that change is constant.
Persons of high self esteem are not driven to make themselves superiors to others, they do not seek to prove their value by measuring themselves against a comparative standard. Their joy is being who they are, not in being better than someone else.
~ Nathaniel Branden
Leads us 2 that same author:
There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self esteem, the more likely one will treat others with respect, kindness, and generosity. People who do not experience self-love have little or no capacity to love others.
Then 4 some reason I am reminded of this code of ethics - esp the bit about those who are lost
And how about the Biblical view
Knowing that God values you gives you absolute, unshakable value. It gives you a stable, healthy esteem for yourself and for others equally.
Dear Lord, help me speak courteously to everyone, including myself. And when I make a mistake, help me to forgive myself quickly and thoroughly, just as I forgive others. Amen
Here is a large & searchable site
Nathaniel again ...
Just as a healthy immune system does not guarantee that one will never become ill, but makes one less vulnerable to disease and better equipped to overcome it, so a healthy self-esteem does not guarantee that one will never suffer anxiety or depression in the face of life's difficulties, but makes one less susceptible and better equipped to cope, rebound and transcend.
Affirmations for Health, Wellness and Healing
This one caught my eye:
I love and accept myself unconditionally.
I approve of myself and feel great about myself.
I radiate love and respect and in return I get love and respect.
I am a well loved and well respected person.
I am a cultured and wise and yet, a humble person.
My high self esteem enables me to respect others and beget respect in turn.
I am free to make my own choices and decisions.
I am a unique and a very special person and worthy of respect of others.
My high self esteem allows me to accept compliments easily and also freely compliment others.
I accept others as they are and they in turn accept me as I am.
It matters little what others say. What matters is how I react and what I believe.
All is well in my world and I trade love and acceptance with the world.
I have high self esteem as I respect myself.
I deserve all that is good. I release any need for misery and suffering.
I release the need to prove myself to anyone as I am my own self and I love it that way.
I am solution minded. Any problem that comes up in life is solvable.
I am never alone. The universe supports me and is with me at every step.
My mind is filled only with loving, healthy, positive and prosperous thoughts which ultimately are converted into my life experiences.
My mind is full of gratitude for my lovely and wonderful life.
I consciously release the past and live only in the present. That way I get to enjoy and experience life to the full.
At that same site - details on how 2 best use affirmations & positive thinking
I am learning to love myself unconditionally, just as God loves me, with patience & with trust
And from a litttle-known book called Soulfood:
The most important thing you can do is love yourself for who you are right now. Don't put it off until you're more patient, thinner, less irritable, more loving or wahtever it is you want to improve about yourself. The fact is you are not and will never be perfect. The things you're dealing with are necessary for your learning and growth, so embrace them and love yourself for who you are right now. You might even find the things you don't like about yourself will take care of themselves.
Heaven Letter about playing well :)
Speaking of loving thoughts ...
A couple of quotes about self confidence
Leads us 2 an interesting page of quotes about wisdom
Absolutely love the plodder :)
Make it a habit 2 think positively (about yourself)
Interesting piece includes why affirmations fail
Got me lookin 4 more sites on that theme
With this being among the results
The benefits of positive thinking - also check out the searches listed at the bottom of the list!
I feel happy on my journey of self-discovery
Top Ten Facts about Low Self Esteem
Came from this search which tosses up a few
Tips for Self-Confidence - at the fabulous Beliefnet site - also tips on coping with depression
Another excellent piece at that site
The problem & solution lie within you
Positive Steps to a More Fulfilling Life
Tips 4 staying out of depression
Uplifting quotes 4 a depressed heart
Ways 2 improve your emotional health
Quotes about being in the moment
Huge collection of gems - some about self-esteem
Leads us 2 this declaration of self-esteem
I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other aspects that I do not know. But as long as I am friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously and hopefully, look for solutions to the puzzles ...
Making every moment count
4 some reason I am reminded of this poem :)
For peace of mind, practice forgiveness
Takes us to this collection of quotes
Each difficult moment can open my heart - very true!
Eckhart Tolle on why people aren't at peace - scroll down 2 'Listen to people's stories'
Depression busters 4 the unemployed
Interesting DVD I wouldn't mind gettin my hot little hands on
How 2 live in the moment & other advice
Techniques 4 Spiritual Evolution - also sign up for an email newsletter
That incomparable Acacia ward experience from 1999 :)
If you DON'T learn to control your negative feelings, you will pay with your PHYSICAL as well as mental health
www.courageoussouls.com
Site with loads about Eckhart - including a few interviews
Life is neither a question to be answered nor a problem to be solved. It is a total mystery, and no amount of intellectual exercise will ever demystify or explain it. Defying all simple logic, it�s an inexplicable paradox. The more we live, the more we know life; but the more we know, the more life proves to be a mystery.
Comes from this excellent site
Quotes 2 boost your self-esteem
From the Heartlight site - and it is searchable!
It'a ALL in how you look at things
Guess what! - more of Eckhart's thoughts on self-worth
Continuing the theme - the ultimate truth of who you are
Advice on journaling - loads of stuff at that site!
... such as these articles about being still
Wisdom about how 2 live in this world
Leads 2 this search about God & love
Suggestion from my psychologist - watch your thoughts like leaves on a stream :)
Holistic approach 2 healing depression
Quotes about meditation - quite a few!
www.becomefearless.org
Tips on overcoming negative emotions from an old pal :)
Stop balming others 4 the way you are feeling
Simple ways 2 becoming a happier person
Most of us don't breathe deeply enough
A common misperception about enjoyment
The meek shall inherit the earth - I highly recommend this book!
Also see some searches in late April 2010 - Just 4 example ... scroll
down 2 'once you KNOW what it is like 2 be overwhelmed by negative emotion you can only feel
compassion 4 those who continue 2 suffrer from it!' - under April 29 & 30
The real key to peace of mind, health, wealth and happiness
Greetings from the God of love continues the theme :)
How about compassion for psychopaths?
The Sedona Method is a simple, powerful, easy-to-learn technique that shows you how to let go of any negative, unwanted or painful feelings you may be experiencing at any particular moment.
Excerpt from what 2 do when your life falls apart
June 2010 update -
Affirmations about unconditional love
Oh there were more sites ... oh well :)
Came from this search using Alta Vista
Quantum wellness has some useful tips too!
You might also care 2 visit this recent page of mine