The Lord said to Noah, "In six months, I'm going to make it rain
until the earth is covered with water and all the evil is 
destroyed. I want you to build an ark and save two of each 
animal species. Here are the blueprints for the ark."

Six months passed. The skies began to cloud and rain began
to fall.

Noah sat in his front yard, weeping.

"Why haven't you built the ark?" asked the Lord.

"Oh, forgive me," said Noah. "I did my best, but so many things
happened.

"The blueprints you gave me didn't meet the city's code and I 
had to change them. Then the city said I was violating the 
zoning ordinance by building an ark in my front yard, so I had 
to get a varience..

"The Forest Service required tree-cutting permits, and I was 
sued by a state animal rights group when I tried to gather up 
the animals.

"The EPA required an environmental impact statement concerning 
the flood. the Army Corps of Engineers wanted a map of the 
proposed flood plain.

"The IRS seized all my assets, claiming I was trying to avoid 
paying taxes by leaving the country, and the Equal Opportunity
Commission said I wasn't hiring enough Croatians.

"I'm sorry, Lord, but I can't finish the ark for at least five 
years."

Suddenly the rain stopped, the skies cleared and the sun began 
to shine.

Noah looked up and said, "Lord, does this mean you're not
going to devastate the earth?"

"Right," said the Lord. "The government already has."