Dragons Don't Exist

Dragons Don't Exist

By Nick Toczek

Dragons, mate? They don't exist.
So cross them off your Xmas list.

We've no such things-
no snakes with wings.

Ask any archaeologist
if dragons do or don't exist.
He'll treat you like you're round the twist.
So pardon me If I insist
that dragon's simply don't exist.

We've no such things-
no snakes with wings,
no spikes, no scales,
no pointed tails.

If any college scientist
suggested that they might exist
then he or she would be dismissed.
Not me, cos I'm a realist.
I know that dragon's don't exist.

We've no such things-
no snakes with wings,
no spikes, no scales,
no pointed tails.
no sudden death
by fiery breath,

no flying oral arsonist.
'The creature simply can't exist,'
says teacher and says naturalist.
It's pure Scotch mist so let's desist
cos dragons simply don't exist.

We've no such things-
no snakes with wings,
no spikes, no scales,
no pointed tails.
no sudden death
by fiery breath,
no rich rewards,
no treasure hoards.

The Blarney Stone must have been kissed
by those insisting they exist.
Oi! See this fist above my wrist?
It's yours right now if you persist,
cos dragons truly don't exist.

He led us to
the dragon's lair,
said: 'I'll show you!'
ans walked in there.

Then came a roar,
a scream, a moan,
and nothing more
was ever known

or missed
of the man who said dragons
didn't exist.