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A Dictator's Life Part One: The Formative Years
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As a small boy, orphaned by his adopted parents to the mean streets of Crystal River where Van Over cut his teeth, the profound life history of the proclaimed "Most Intelligent Male in Citrus County" is brought to you for your enjoyment, because if you don't enjoy it, you will be shot. Have a nice Day!
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Even as a boy of the tender age of four, young Van Over knew his destiny was to be great. Through all the painful days of polio he never gave up (see picture) and always hid his horrible pain with a smile and a big thumbs up, always proclaiming "das good" whenever asked how he was.
Life was rough, and nothing easy. He was orphaned at an early age to be raised by his two psycopathic brothers who introduced him to professional wrestling. While his brother Yaro was executing a figure four leg lock one Saturday afternoon, young Van's legs snapped loudly and a miracle occured! His polio was cured! The next few years young Van grew as any young dictators do, daily meals of liver and onions, chores to earn a meeger 2 cents an hour, and many many hours spent dreaming of a better life.
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The Hunt For a Dream
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At the age of 17, Van left his terrible conditions of living with his brothers. Throughout the years, young Van had managed to save $10.68 which he used to make his escaped. Armed with but a dream, and the ambition to be better, Van searched the county over to find his purpose. He knew he was to do something great that would make a difference, something that he could bring a starving hurting world. Then one day, over a Heath Blizzard he looked up and dropped his ice cream and realized "Damn I only have 48 cents left!" Only then did he realize things needed to change.....
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The Learning Years, Dictator School and Alot more.....kinda
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Van looked in the Glorious local newspaper hoping to find what he was looking for. In the daily elderly gripe column he found the answer to what the world needed. A old hag from Inverness had written " What we need is a change, with what we have here now, we might as well be ruled by a dictator." BINGO.
With those words, he read no more. He knew what he had to do, but didn't know how to do it. It was through an Infomercial on late night t.v. that he saw the 30 minutes that would change his life forever. Dictator University located in the dismal city of Tallahassee Florida was the place for him. He packed up his plastic grocery bag and headed out to learn the ways of ruling with an iron fist......
To Be Continued........
"A Dictator's Life" sponsored in part by Van Over For Dictator in 2000 in partnership with Dairy Queen and Viagra:The Wonder Drug
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