We all want to enjoy life. To be happy. To have an inner peace and an inner joy. It's what this life is all about. We weren't put on the earth to glummy let life pass us by. We're here to experience life. We're here to enjoy life.

I've been doing some introspection lately to find out what I personally can do to change my own lifestyle habits and experience and enjoy life to the fullest. I came up with 5 areas that I wanted to work at. I guess you could say my new years resolutions came in the middle of the year. My desire is to be mentally, physically, emotionally, financially, and spiritually fit.

Mentally: am I slacking off, wasting time, just watching television, or am I taking time to use my mind, to think, to promote change?

Physically: am I happy with my appearance, my body, who I am, and what shape I'm in?

Emotionally: am I happy with the relationships I'm in, am I honest, am I hiding parts of myself, do I show my emotions or hide them, am I able to be myself?

Finanacially: am I where I want to be, am I in debt, do I have a plan, do I have a secure job that I enjoy?

Spiritually: do I take joy in the journey of life, do I seek to find answers to the questions that plague me, am I in fear of a deity, or do I have peace in the spirituality of my life?

If you put each of those things on a scale of satisfaction, with 1 being not at all satisfied and 10 being totally satisfied, I would rate myself as follows:

Mentally: 8/10
This web page has helped a lot in raising my mental maturity. I'm thinking about things that used to just lay dormant. IRC chat has also helped because I often find myself in debates and dialogues with people of differing beliefs. These debates have helped me focus my own beliefs and helped me to realize where I am.

Physically: 5/10
I've been going to the gym for a month now. I don't really see any results from my tri-weekly workout but I'm feeling better from going. I still have a lot of work to do on getting better eating habbits.

Emotionally: 7/10
I'm not lying about my sexuality to anyone know. Even my parents know that I'm gay. But I'd be lying if I say I still get depressed from time to time. I still feel alone because I don't really know anyone else in the area that I can relate to. I often wish I was dating, but don't know how that will happen.

Financially: 4/10
I haven't started my job yet, but I will be starting soon and am looking forward to it. It won't pay a lot (less than minimum wage), but it will pay more than I need. Also my viewbare from AllAdvantage is bringing in about $150 per month now.

Spiritually: 6/10
Talking to people online in IRC and through email has helped me to deal with some of my spiritual questions. I'm still going to church and still praying. I still have a lot of questions. I'm working through them.

We all want to enjoy life. To measure 10 on every scale. But it takes so much effort. Step by step, I've been working at raising my scales and changing how I'm living. I would love to some day be able to honestly say I'm at 10 each of the scales.

Mentally. I think that working to help people overcome their biases against homosexuals will greatly help me grow mentally. It's easy to walk away from chat rooms like #christian that kick you for saying our gay, but by going back and talking with those persons I can cause growth in myself and in them.

Physically. I need to continue going to the gym and I absolutely have to start eating better. I have to cut out more snacks or I'll never get physically where I want to be.

Emotionally. Finding ways to meet people in the community will help me greatly in this area. I don't know where to start, but I'll keep my eye open.

Financially. I'll be starting work at the South Bend Center for the Homeless soon. When I start recieving pay checks from work I'll be very happy financially.

Spiritually. Discussing matters of faith with people of faith helps greatly. I often disagree with the people I talk with, but by taking with them I realize where I stand. Knowing where I stand I can then walk in that belief.

I have a lot of changes to make in order to become the person that I want to be. Life was meant to be enjoyed, and I think I'll find the most fulfillment when I'm mentally, phsyically, emotionally, financially, and spiritually fit. I'm not where I want to be, but I'm taking joy in the journey to getting there. I'll use this page as a meter to remind myself where I am and how far I've got to go. All of use should continually question, measure, and work towards change. Enjoy life.