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A Bare Encounter in Colorado
by Joseph C. Hinson
relying heavily on reporting by Marija B. Vader The Daily Sentinel
Tuesday August 8, 2000

How did you spend your day? The following story was linked to Trainorders. In a roundabout way, it correlates somewhat directly to a few things I have been ranting about lately, most notably Sexuality in America. That is, that you should be able to do what you please as long as you do not hurt the person or property or another. It is that simple phrase that is the backbone for the late Peter McWilliams' book, Ain't Nobody's Business If You Do: The Absurdity of Consensual Crimes in a Free Society.

But at it's core, it's about a naked woman.

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Mary Perez, 31, of Denver, took off all of her clothes, walked through the low flowing Colorado River and then ambled along the Union Pacific Railroad tracks wearing nothing but a smile, said Garfield County Sheriff's spokesman Steve Hardesty.

"She wanted to get involved more in nature," Hardesty said. "She was a free-spirited person."

Perez had been driving along Interstate 70 when she decided to stop, strip and take a hike, Hardesty said.

A Colorado Department of Transportation employee called authorities.

When Perez spotted a sheriff's deputy, a Union Pacific track inspector and a Colorado State Patrol officer pointing at her, she began climbing up a rock slide, Hardesty said. The three men retrieved the woman and gave her a t-shirt to wear.

"She told us she gets naked over there, and no one gets upset about it," Hardesty said. He also said no drugs or alcohol were involved.

Perez told police she works as a professional dancer at clubs and by private appointment.

Authorities did not press charges because no one complained and there was no victim, Hardesty said. (Hey, Joe Friday, maybe you should remember that next time you arrest someone for simple possession of marijuana.)

Had there been a traffic jam or accident along the interstate, police would have issued a citation, he added. Also, Union Pacific chose to not file trespassing charges.

"We don't want to encourage this type of behavior," Hardesty said. "It definitely was goofy."

There have been several reported sightings of grizzly bears in the area in the past few days. This was a bare sighting of a different sort.

Oh, yeah, you gotta love America! Sadly, there were no photographs of this news event.

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