Time Out
Christmas time 1999
We have had a good year
We have shared feelings
You shared about yourself
I have done the same
Late this year I had major surgery
I awoke with a lot of unknown feelings
I asked for quiet time to heal
You were in a quiet place yourself
The closer it came to Christmas the more I withdrew
Questioning the feelings with in me
Feelings of my life
Feelings about our relationship
It set up another struggle between us
Your 12-step program is your life
Your program saved your life
The program is NOT my life
Trying to learn, feel and figure myself out
I am not you
We are a lot alike but yet different and separate
Looking for common ground again for the 4th time
I am tired
You are tired
Boundaries to meet and still have a relationship
Needing time to figure myself out
Time to understand your depth and accept it
Time to accept you can not be all to me
Time to accept you are different than me
Time to accept we cannot always be there for each other
Time for mountains of acceptance and healing
Wanting a relationship with you
But not like this
Not where I have to work any program
Not where I have to talk about feelings everyday
Not to have to do things your way
We talked about meeting each other ½ way
I don't believe we do this
So how do we find this?
How do we come to acceptance of each other?
Without demands and expectations
You are my mother
I loved you before I ever knew you
I don't want to lose you
Give me time and space to find out what I want and need
No matter what happens I will always LOVE you
-written by Tina to her
B-Mom Ginger 01/00
|
