AND NOW DEEP THOUGHTS...
I love these because they remind me of when I was younger and my my big brother would stay up late on Saturday nights and watched Saturday Night Live and whenever Deep Thoughts would come on, we would jusr crack up and laugh so hard! Well, thats whay I love 'em. I hope you do to. (^_^)
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� 1998
I wish there was a disease where you're afraid of clouds, because I think I could cure it.First, you sit the patient down and have a long personal talk. After that, I'm not sure, but
maybe you could throw some water in his face or something.
I don't pretend to have all the answers. I don't pretend to even know what the questions are. Hey, where am I?
When I was a child, there were times when we had to entertain ourselves. And usually the best way to do that was to turn on the TV.
One day one of my little nephews came up to me and asked me if the equator was a real line that went around the Earth, or just an imaginary one. I had to laugh. Laugh and laugh. Because I didn't know, and I thought that maybe by laughing he would forget
what he asked me.
Here's a good joke to do during an earthquake: Straddle a big crack in the ground, and if it opens wider, go "Whoa! Whoa!" and flail your arms around, like you're going to fall in.
I don't think I'm ever more "aware" than I am right after I hit my thumb with a hammer.
Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself. Mankind. Basically, it's made up of two separate words---"mank" and "ind". What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind
If you ever crawl inside an old hollow log and go to sleep, and while you're in there some guys come and seal up both ends and then put it on a truck and take it to another city, boy, I don't know what to tell you.
I wish I could shrink down to the size of an ant. And maybe there would be thousands of other people shrunken down to ant-size, and we would get together and dig tunnels down into the ground and live there. But don't ever call us "ants," because we hate that.
The wise man can pick up a grain of sand and envision a whole universe. But the stupid man will just lie down on some seaweed and roll around until he's completely draped in it. Then he'll stand up and go, "Hey, I'm Vine Man."
