Runaways are generally not bad kids, they are just children who have made a bad decision. They could no longer face the pressures of their everyday life and need to escape. They have chosen to run from their problems instead of facing them or trying to get help. Maybe they thought that they were asking for help and their signals were misunderstood. We need to teach our teens how to deal with their problems, we need to teach problem solving skills and give them the tools to do so. Almost every teen has either tried to runaway, or knows someone who did. This causes problems because it becomes glamorized. And being a parent of a runaway does not make you a bad parent. A survey done by the National Runaway Switchboard of the children who call the service indicates that only about 16 percent of runaways have been abused physically, emotionally or sexually. Abused children tend to stick around, and not run from the situation.

If your Teens Runs:
Call the Police, IMMEDIATELY!! Don't wait 24 hours, do it right away. Get the name and badge number of the officer you speak with. Call the officer back with any information you think of, any clues that you come across.

Call everyone that your child knows and enlist his or her help. Search everywhere that you can think of, but do not leave your phone unattended, you can get a cellular phone and forward your home phone to it. Make sure that someone stays at your home just incase he/she returns.

Search your teen's room for anything that may give you a clue as to where he went. You may also want to check your phone bill for any calls they may have made recently.

Call the National Runaway Switchboard 1-800-621-4000, you can leave a message for your child with them.


When Your Teen Comes Home:
Take a break from each other. Do not start talking about it right away. Your emotions are too high at this point to get anywhere in a conversation. Go two separate directions until you both have gotten some rest.

Ask and Listen. Why did they leave? You may want to evaluate a rule or two after speaking with them, but do not do so while having this talk. Tell them you are willing to think about it, and you will let them know.

Talk! Do not argue or yell. Tell him/her how you felt about their leaving, let them know that they you were hurt and worried by their running away. Let them know that there isn't a problem that both of you together can't solve. That if they ever feel like running away might solve the problem they should talk to you first; you can offer other choices, enabling them to make a better decision.

And please get some type of help. Especially if this isn't the first time he/she has runaway, or you have problems communicating when they come back. Ask for help. This help can come from a person that both you and your child know, respect and feel comfortable talking too. Or seek professional help for both of you. Whatever works best for you and your child. The most important thing to do is open those lines of communication between the two of you; and above all, be honest about your feelings.

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