My Poems 1 - 10

Lifecycle  Heresy  Effuse  Barren  The Idiosyncratic Nature of Actuality  Hysteria  Despair  The Struggle Within  Ad Infinitum  Futility 

Lifecycle

As we crawled forth from the ocean of reality
Mere sparks from the great fires
Potential abound
How quickly we slipped
Through the cracks of hypocrisy
To that which we condemned
Our ideals repressed
Progress, freedom; yet not
We fail to realize:
"To exist is to create our own life"
"We are only as free as we choose to be"
We are after all...
                     only stardust

 

Heresy

As twilight leaves me
Night becomes my shroud
Gone now the pretence of stability
Patiently I wait...




Only once the barriers are down
Do I make my presence known
Swiftly, deftly, satiety




But now conformity seeps back
Through my veins, as I return
To where I am but a vestige
Of my true self

 

Effuse

Alone among the maddening crowd
A quiet island of tranquillity
Derided into submission

 

Barren

With twine about my nape I leave
For pastures fresh and green
Though never there before myself
"Wonderful", say those who've seen.

 

The Idiosyncratic Character of Actuality

Who can know reality that has not existed as everyone as himself?
To truly know ourselves, we must see that which only others see
To know what others know of us
Perhaps only then can we attain enlightenment
"To know 'God' first we must know ourselves".

But is such knowledge desirable?
Would it fill the void or merely augment it?
The truth surely is
That it is unattainable, there is no answer, we can never know
Perhaps luckiest is he who does not think to stop to question
And is ignorant of his ignorance
Doomed are they who venture on this voyage of undiscovery
For from within there is no escape

 

Hysteria

What would I be
If I was not I?
To lose control of my
Own self
If I still exist
Where do I hide?
Can I escape
This intolerable cerebral torment?
I have become but a parasite
In my own consciousness

But I am not destined
To win
My psyche rapidly diminishing
With each passing moment
Until I am no more...

 

Despair

I cower in shame
After the deed is done
The guilt returns to haunt me
But I cannot stop
This desire I could never control
And how often I've tried
Whilst fairly successful with other afflictions
This one has always eluded me
Each time the guilt brings
The will to stop
But as the night passes
So too the resolve
A circle of such viciousness
Can I ever escape?

 

The Struggle Within

How often I have considered
That darkest of deeds
Perhaps...because...maybe...

I cannot claim to know the answers
Though I embrace all new concepts
Adapting them to my needs

Life outside my perceived reality
Scares and frightens me
And ever stronger grows the fear
That I am losing control
Of my apparent normality

 

Ad Infinitum

Every day I hope against hope
For the ending of this turmoil
As each creative release
Strengthens my spirit
The darkness subsides
And I dream of liberation
But my pessimism besieges me
Ensuring I am trapped forever

 

Futility

What I forever hunger
I do not know
The craving inside me
Claws at my gut
Ravaging my mind
As I seek the answer
Endlessly I try
To slake this desire
Yet nothing can satisfy it
Won't this incessant yearning
Ever cease?

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