� Katrina99
Rated PG **may want to watch the kiddies eyes just a little...a few choice words**
Jordan woke up early as the suns rays streamed through the window. He stretched his naked body underneath the sheets and sat up to collect his thoughts. He turned to find Katrina sleeping soundly next to him. His thoughts turned to last night and what they'd done. He ran his hands through his hair and quickly got out the bed. He needed some air. He pulled on his clothes and left a little note on the bed letting Katrina know that he was taking a walk around the neighborhood.
When Jordan came back Katrina was in the kitchen feeding Alayna. She was fully dressed and very cheerful. "Hey Jordan, early riser, want any breakfast. I could whip you up some eggs and bacon." She was in an exceptional mood after last night. It was obvious that he had feelings for her too.
"No, I think I'm going to head on out. Long day and all." He turned from the look of disappointment in her face. It was another thing he couldn't face. Hurting her.
"Oh, well okay, if you have to." Alayna decided at that moment to send her bowl of food flying off in the direction of the floor.
"Yeah, I'd better. But hey, I'll call you later okay." He came over and kissed her forehead before leaving the house. She was more than a little disappointed but she went about her usual day, leaving the kids with a sitter and heading off to work. The call came at 4:00 that he wanted to meet her at a nearby caf�. It was something.
"Hey Jordan, sorry I'm late." She said pulling out the chair and plopping down at the table.
"Don't worry about it, I ordered you a hot chocolate." He looked at her. What he felt could not be explained all he knew was that last night had changed everything for him. He watched as she took a sip of her cocoa and got situation.
"So, what's up? Busy day?"
"Yes. Actually I'll be busy for awhile. I just wanted to tell you that. I'm not going to be around much." There, he'd lied as best he could. The disappointment showed again in her eyes.
"Oh, well, I guess." She didn't quite know what to say. "Does it have anything to do with last night?"
He didn't know how to answer that. "No?well, yes. Well, honestly Kat, it does. I think we made the biggest mistake last night. There can never be anything between us. You must know that." He kept his composure as he continued to lie. "I should have stopped you, but I guess I felt sorry for you, and it had been a long time for me."
Katrina couldn't believe what he was hearing. Was that it? That was all he had to say to her and she was supposed to just go on her merry little way? "You know Jordan I wish you had, then I wouldn't have to sit here and listen to this bull from you. You had every opportunity to let me know you weren't interested. I thought I felt a lot of feeling there, but I guess you're good at faking that." She was so angry she didn't know what else to say. "How could you do this to me Jordan? How?" The question bore right through him.
"Because I'm the biggest jerk you've ever know and I love you to death." Jordan answered silently. He was too scared to say it to her face. Instead he just hung his head down.
"We've been friends for so long. I would have thought you could have told me that. I would have been hurt, yeah, but not as hurt as I am right now. So now what? We forget this ever happened?" Her eyes were red with fire.
"I don't think we can do that Kat. It's more complicated than that."
"You asshole. You think it was easy for me to throw myself at you? You think it was easy to look beyond our past. I felt more for you Jordan. Silly me. Silly me for thinking that you were remotely like your brother. You're nothing like him. He's got morals, he has respect for me and for himself. You Jordan, you don't know respect. I thought you did, but boy was I wrong."
Her words hurt him more than she would ever know, but it was reciprocal. He'd hurt her, she hurt him. All he could do was take it. "I'm sorry Kat, right now that's all I can say?"
She stood up and looked at him with nothing but hate. "I have nothing more to say to you, Mr. Jordan Knight. Not now, not ever." With that she walked out on him and hailed a cab praying that one would stop before the tears threatened to spill down her face.
Jordan sat at the table absorbing all her words. The restaurant had returned to normal after witnessing Katrina's outburst. He was asking the same question of himself "How could he do this to her." He was too cowardly to tell her the truth, that he was afraid of where they were heading.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Happy Birthday to you." Suzi and Leilani both sung, off key, holding their wine coolers. They were all sitting around Katrina's living room celebrating her 27th birthday.
"Aw you guys didn't have to do this, but thanks. Sorry I'm not in much of a partying mood."
Suzi figured it was time to get Katrina out of her mood. She jumped over the sofa and landed right next to her friend. "Okay, what is it?"
"Huh?"
"Long face? Who did what and why? And don't try to get out of it. This is me remember."
"How in the hell could I forget Suzi." Kat sighed, she wouldn't get a moments piece anyway. "It's Jordan."
"Oh, you mean the man you're NOT in love with?" Katrina gave her a deadly look.
"You want to hear this or not?" Suzi shut up. "Well, first of all, you were so right. I do love him. I feel guilty as hell about it but I can't help it. I can't help who I fall in love with" she used the same words as Suzi. "Anyway, that day, after the dinner with you guys, we sort of?well." She let it trail off. She looked at both her friends and knew they got the full meaning.
"You and Jordan?." Leila began.
"F*cked" Suzi yelled.
"For lack of a BETTER word, yes you guys. It was wonderful, I mean it was incredible, it was?"
"Jordan." Both girls said at the same time. "So why are you sitting here looking like he just told you to get lost. You should be happy." Suzi didn't understand.
"He told me that he did it as a favor to me. That he didn't really want to."
"Oh Katrina are you serious?" Suzi couldn't believe her ears. This was not the same Jordan she'd seen at the house. She could tell that he felt exactly the same as Katrina. "But I thought?"
"So did I but looks like we were wrong. It hurts so much you guys. Not just that, but we were so close and now because of my stupid hormones that's all gone. I haven't talked to him since that day."
"What would make him say something like that?" Leila wondered.
"Maybe he's lying maybe he is scared that he didn't satisfy you enough in bed and he doesn't know how to handle it. Male pride." Leila said innocently and despite her mood it sent Katrina into a fit of laughter.
"Oh yeah that'll be the day. Could you imagine Jordan not satisfying someone?" Suzi said between giggles.
"Believe me?Jordan satisfies you." She took a sip of her drink and stared sadly into the fireplace.
"Come on Kat, you've got a babysitter, we're going out. You're not going to sit around here brooding over a man, be it Jordan or anyone." Suzi pulled her up and out of the house and a few hours later they were leaving a club, giddy and happy.
"Gosh you two, thanks so much. You two always manage to make me laugh, even on my saddest day." Katrina put her arms around her two best friends.
"That's what we're here for, to make you laugh and help you cry." Leilani said. "But seriously Kat, I don't know what is up with Jordan but whatever it is, he'll snap out of it, eventually."
"Well I hope he does within the next month." She looked at both her friends. "I'm moving."
"Where?" They assumed out of the house.
"Back to LA. Ive thought about things and I just need to make a brand new start for the kids and myself. It's something I've thought about for awhile." But it was just at that moment that she decided that she was actually going to do it. There wasn't anymore happiness in this city anyway. She hated the look on their faces as they heard her..
"No way, Kat. You can't just up and leave because Jordan doesn't love you."
"I'm not. I've thought about it way before Jordan. It's something that's best for me. I'll still be back you guys and think about it, a chance to hang out in LA whenever you want. Open invitation."
"If you have to, I'm not going to say anything to stop you. Actually I think it'll be good for you and the kids. Plus your family is there." Suzi became optimistic "Heck, I can deal with vacationing on the beaches of Malibu with some hunky surfer bringing me a little fuzzy drink with an umbrella on it." She started daydreaming.
"I think you're confusing LA with Hawaii dear." She hugged her friends. "But thanks for understanding." She held up her bottle of wine cooler "But we still have a month to party, girl style." All three women collapsed in a heap and continued their celebration in the car.**Continued from Part 2**