"Mother £¦ Child Reunlon" / Tuesday - January 5, 1999

TIFFANI : Come on, don't pick on Sly. It's only been a month since our last gig.
JENNY : It hasn't been a month. It's been thirty-two days. But who's counting, Sly?
SLY : I'm telling you, the Dreams are just too "beachy." We need a new image.
MATT : Our image? Maybe we need to practice more.
JENNY : Maybe we need more dance tunes.
TONY : Maybe we need a new manager.
JUDY : Melody!
MOM : Hi...
JUDY : It's so good to see you again! You look great.
MOM : Oh, so do you. You really do...just look great.
JUDY : You don't remember who I am, do you?
MOM : Of course I do. You're...you're...you're right. I don't remember.
JUDY : It's me--Judy Webb. Judy Smith.
MOM : Oh! Oh...
SLY : I'm telling you, hot bands always have some kind of hook.
MATT : Come on, Sly. We're good. We don't need gimmicks.
TIFFANI : You guys argue it out. I've got laundry to do. My dad's been pretty busy lately, so
           that just leaves me.
SLY : Nah, I'm serious about this stuff. Elvis had his pompadour. Ah, Slaughter has those
      tatoos. Marky mark has his underwear hanging out of his pants...
MOM : So, does Tiffani know you're back?
JUDY : No, I haven't seen her yet.
MOM : Oh, do you remember...?
JUDY : Jenny and Matt, of course. Do you know who I am?
MATT : Of course I do. You're you're... No. I have no idea.
JENNY : Oh my gosh, you're Tiffani's mother.
MATT : Whoa. Does Tiffani know you're back?
JUDY : No. I went to the house but no one was home. Then I remembered that Jenny and
       Tiffani were very close, so I came here. You are still good friends, aren't you?
JENNY : The best.
JUDY : I'll never forget the games you used to play. Tiffani would pretend that she was in a
       fairytale forest, and you would always try to convince her that it wasn't real.
JENNY : Well, it wasn't.
TONY : Sylvester, you're such a low-brained-pie-in-the-sky-gimmick-pitching-sleazeball,
        sometimes I want to slap your head. Oh, excuse me. I, I didn't know you dad company.
SLY : And, you can keep me company anytime! I'll bet a woman like you has heard every line
      in the book. So what's one more gonna hurt? Ha-ha-ha.
MATT : Sly, meet Tiffani's mother.
SLY : Yeah, right. You just want her for yourself.
MOM : No, Sly, she really is Tiffani's mother.
SLY : You can have her.
JUDY : Can you kids tell me where I might find Tiffani?
JENNY : You just missed her, but you know what? She's really gonna be shocked. It might be
          better if we tell her you're back in town.
MOM : Yeah, honey, that's a real good idea.
JUDY : Thank you. That probably would be best.
JENNY : Just leave everything to me, Matt, Tony and... Me, Matt and Tony.
JENNY : Hi.
TONY : Hey, Tif.
TIFFANI : Hi, guys. come on in. Let me put this away.
SLY : Ah, cool.
TIFFANI : Sly, be careful! Those are my special stuffties.
SLY : Aw. These things are built to last.
TIFFANI : I'm happy you guys stopped by.
MATT : Great. I hope you feel that way after we tell you...what we have to tell you.
JENNY : Yeah, ah, Tif. You see...
JENNY : Please. It would really help things a lot if you wouldn't smile.
JENNY : Tiffany!
TIFFANY : I'm sorry, but my face is naturally smiley.
SLY : Let me do it. All those whose mothers ran away ten years ago never to be heard from
      again, please raise your hand.
SLY : Not so fast there, Smith.
MATT/JENNY/TONY : SLY!
JENNY : Look, Tif, your mom is back in town and she wants to see you.
TIFFANI : My mother... My mother's back! Really!
TIFFANI : Well, that's wonderful! Wow!
JENNY : You're happy to hear this?
TIFFANI : Of course I am.
JENNY : I just thought you'd be a little upset given that she abandoned you.
TIFFANI : Oh, I don't blame her. She was really young when she had me. And she got this
           offer to dance in a Broadway show, and it was kind of painful when she left -- for
           my dad. But now she's back, and I can't wait to see her!
SLY : Well, great. Cuz if you're not upset about that, then, ah, you won't mind this.
MOM : Tiffani, your mom's here.
TIFFANI : Oh, I lied. I'm nervous. I don't want to see her.
MATT : Go on, Tif. You have nothing to be afraid of.
TIFFANI : No, you're wrong! What if she hates me? What if I say something really stupid? What
           if I burp in front of her?
MATT : Look, Tif, if I were in your position, what would you tell me?
TIFFANI : Hmm. Well...I'd tell you that fear is a four letter word for "I can't."
TIFFANI : And that if Neil Armstrong had given into fear we wouldn't have moonrocks, moondust,
           moonshadows, and Michael Jackson wouldn't know how to moonwalk...
MATT : Okay, okay, I'm going.
JENNY : Not you! Her!
TIFFANI : Right. I'm out of here!
SLY : Oh, hey, Tif, going to see your mom? Don't say anything stupid.
JENNY : Go.
TONY : What is that thing, Sylvester?
SLY : Meet the "Smoke-a-tron 2000." The smoke machine.
SLY : Now imagine: the stage is smokey, you burst through the smoke, and BABOOM! Groupies
      passed out all over each other.
MATT : Forger it, Sly.
SLY : Trust me. You'll love it.
JUDY : I've been thinking about this moment for ten years... I still don't know what to say to
       her.
MOM : I'm sure you'll both have a lot to talk about.
JUDY : I just hope she can forgive me.
MOM : Go ahead. It's gonna be fine.
JUDY : You're so big.
JUDY : Oh, Tiffani, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry I left you. I'm so sorry I never called.
TIFFANI : It's okay.
JUDY : I meant to get in touch. But I felt so guilty at first, and then after a few years I was
       afraid you would hate me.
JUDY : Tiffani, I was so young. I, um...
TIFFANI : Let's just forget all that stuff. It's ancient history.
JUDY : Are you sure you don't hate me?
TIFFANI : I could never hate you. You're my mom.
TIFFANI : I'm just glad you're back in my life, now.
JUDY : Oh, we have so much to catch up on. Tell me about, ah...tell me about... anything.
TIFFANI : Okay, I, um... Do you smell something?
MATT : Sly! I thought you said you knew how to use that thing!
SLY : Well, it isn't my fault your room isn't a well-ventilated area!
TONY : Someone should ventilate your head, you big Smokey-The-Bear-looking-chump!
SLY : Come on, guys. It's just a little smoke. It's not like the place is on fire, or anything.
TIFFANI : Come on, Mom. Let's go find some place quiet where we can talk.
MATT : So, where were you guys?
JUDY : Tiffani was showing me how to surf. I did okay, but she is amazing.
JENNY : You two are amazing. Movies, aerobics, surfing... What's next?
TIFFANI/JUDY : Rollerblading.
SLY : Rollerblading! I like it! Imagine: the Dreams skate onto the stage and as you begin to
      play, you do a little, uh, roller-dance thingy.
TIFFANI : I don't know about rollerblades, but lots of bands have dancing in their act.
TIFFANI : Hey, my mother's choreographed a bunch of music videos. Mom, do you think you
           could help us out?
JUDY : Well, sure. I could show you a few moves.
SLY : I'm smiling. Do you guys see this face? I am a happy manager!
JUDY : Okay. Why don't you play something with a nice, solid downbeat.
SLY : You got it.
JUDY : Now just watch what I do and follow along.
JENNY : Ow! Matt, get off me!
TONY : Oh! Man! Keep your big, Sasquach feet to yourself!
TIFFANI : I think I've got it, Matt. Watch me, okay.
MATT : I'm sorry, I'm just not a dancer.
JUDY : But you are, Tiffani. That was great.
JUDY : You must get your talent from me. Your dad always had two left feet.
TIFFANI : Forget it. Dancing was a bad idea. Let's just go rollerblading.
JENNY : Ah, Tif, can I talk to you for a second?
JUDY : I'll just wait for you in the car.
JENNY : Ah, guys, I need to speak with Tiffani, alone.
JENNY : ALONE!
TONY : Hey, hey, we're out of here. We're gone. We're history.
JENNY : What's wrong, Tif?
TIFFANI : Nothing. I'm fine.
JENNY : That's not what I saw. I think you're holding back ten years of anger towards your
         mother.
TIFFANI : I don't know what you're talking about.
JENNY : Oh, give me a break, Tiffani. The woman ditched you when you were six.
TIFFANI : Jenny, get off my case! My mother came back, and I'm happy! So, just let it lie, all
           right.
JENNY : Okay, I'm sorry.
TONY : Can we come back in now?
JENNY : NO!
TIFFANI : Hi, Mom. I got the message to meet you here. But you didn't say why.
JUDY : I couldn't, honey. I wanted it to be a...
ALL : SURPRISE! HAPPY SWEET SIXTEEN!
TIFFANI : Oh, oh, wow, you guys really surprised me. Especially since my birthday's not til
           tomorrow.
JENNY : Well, we did it today becase you always have that special birthday dinner with your
         dad.
TIFFANI : How dare you?
JUDY : What?
TIFFANI : Do you think you can just come back into my life after ignoring me for ten years
           and expect me to go live with you like nothing ever happened!
JUDY : Tiffani, I didn't...
TIFFANI : You expect me to run out on Dad like you did?! How dare you! You left me! You
           never cared! You were never my mother and you never will be! I hate you!!!
MATT : I've never seen Tiffani so angry. I didn't even know she could get angry.
SLY : Yeah. I can't believe her.
JENNY : Why? She couldn't keep those feelings bottled up inside forever.
SLY : I don't mean that. I can't believe she turned down a free plane ticket to New York.
TONY : Yo, Sylvester. What is that thing on your hand?
SLY : What thing?
TONY : Never mind.
JENNY : Stop clowning around. I'm really worried about Tiffani. She doesn't know how to handle
         intense emotion. She's probably a basket case.
TIFFANI : Hi, guys.
JENNY : Hi. Are you all right, Tif?
TIFFANI : Yeah, I'm fine.
MATT : Are you sure? I mean, it's cool with us if you don't want to go to the audition.
SLY : No it isn't. I worked hard to set this thing up.
TONY : Yo, Sylvester. What's that thing on your foot?
TIFFANI : Of course I'm coming to the audition. I'm fine.
MOM : Tiffani.
MOM : Your mother asked me to tell you that she's leaving today at four o'clock, and she
       wanted you to have her address and phone number just in case you change your mind.
TIFFANI : Well, I guess she's doing what she does best -- leaving. I don't need this.
TIFFANI : Come on. Let's get ready for the audition.
TIFFANI : Oh, yeah. Look, Mom...
JUDY : It's okay, Tiffani. I understand. I don't want to intrude on your relationship with your
        father.
TIFFANI : Thanks.
SLY : SURPRISE!
TONY : Yo, Sly. Let me tell you about the Tony Wicks' Rule of Surprise Party Etiquette.
        There's only one -- it's very simple. IT DON'T WORK IF YOU SHOW UP LATE,
        DOPE!!!
SLY : Well, excuse me. I was working on a surprise of my own. I got you guys an audition!
MATT : Really? For who?!
SLY : A big time club owner is coming to the garage tomorrow to hear us play.
JUDY : Good going, Sly.
SLY : Thank you, Mrs. Smith. All in a day's work.
JUDY : Well, it's not "Smith" anymore. I changed it back to "Webb" a long time ago.
TIFFANI : So, whose present should I open first?
JUDY : Here, honey. Open mine.
TIFFANI : A plane ticket to New York?
JUDY : Well, it was a little awkward, but I had a talk with your dad and he agreed that if you
        wanted to, you could come to New York and live with me for a year.
TIFFANI : How dare you?
JUDY : What?
TIFFANI : Do you think you can just come back into my life after ignoring me for ten years
           and expect me to go live with you like nothing ever happened!
JUDY : Tiffani, I didn't...
TIFFANI : You expect me to run out on Dad like you did?! How dare you! You left me! You
           never cared! You were never my mother and you never will be! I hate you!!!
MATT : I've never seen tiffani so angry. I didn't even know she could get angry.
SLY : Yeah. I can't believe her.
JENNY : Why? She couldn't keep those feelings bottled up inside forever.
SLY : I don't mean that. I can't believe she turned down a free plane ticket to New York.
TONY : Yo, Sylvester. What is that thing on your hand?
SLY : What thing?
TONY : Never mind.
JENNY : Stop clowning around. I'm really worried about Tiffani. She doesn't know how to handle
         intense emotion. She's probably a basket case.
TIFFANI : Hi, guys.
JENNY : Hi. Are you all right, Tif?
TIFFANI : Yeah, I'm fine.
MATT : Are you sure? I mean, it's cool with us if you don't want to go to the audition.
SLY : No it isn't. I worked hard to set this thing up.
TONY : Yo, Sylvester. What's that thing on your foot?
TIFFANI : Of course I'm coming to the audition. I'm fine.
MOM : Tiffani.
MOM : Your mother asked me to tell you that she's leaving today at four o'clock, and she
       wanted you to have her address and phone number just in case you change your mind.
TIFFANI : Well, I guess she's doing what she does best -- leaving. I don't need this.
TIFFANI : Come on. Let's get ready for the audition.
JENNY : Does anybody else have an uncontrollable urge to slam dance?
TONY : No. But I'm amazed that I can dress like this, and still look good.
SLY : All right, Mr. Farrell, sir. Here we are. And here they are. The "California Nightmares!"
MATT : "Nightmares?"
SLY : Yeah. "Dreams" was too nice -- it didn't go with the look.
SLY : Mr. Farrell, brace yourself cuz you're about to hear music to start a riot by. Fire it up,
      Pitbull.
MATT : Okay, let's do it, scuzbuckets! One, three, five, nine...

(MUSIC CUE : "LOVE'S NOT LIKE THIS"
MATT : CRYING ON THE TELEPHONE
  DRIVE AWAY THEN TURN BACK HOME
  ALWAYS GO BUT NEVER STAY ALONE
  WISHFUL THINKING IN THE NIGHT
  NO ONE'S WRONG AND NO ONE'S RIGHT
  OH TELL ME WON'T FIGHT AGAIN
ALL : LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS
JENNY/TONY/TIFFANI : LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS
ALL : LOVE IS NOT LIKE
NO NO NO
LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS ON THE RADIO
LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS
JENNY/TONY/TIFFANI : LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS
ALL : LOVE IS NOT LIKE
NO NO NO
LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS ON THE RADIO
SAY GOODBYE
TONY : GOODBYE
ALL : SAY HELLO
TONY : HELLO
MATT : WE ARE
ALL : ON AND OFF AND UP AND DOWN AND HOT AND COLD
MATT : LOOK INTO EACH OTHERS HEART
  WONDERING WHAT WE'LL FIND THERE
  WHEN DOES EMPATHIZING START
  ALL WE DO IS STAND AND STARE
  JUSTIFYING POINTS OF VIEW
  KEEP RATIONALIZING
  WHAT IS FALSE AND WHAT IS TRUE OH, OH
ALL : LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS
JENNY/TONY/TIFFANI : LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS
ALL : LOVE IS NOT LIKE
NO NO NO
LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS ON THE RADIO
LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS
JENNY/TONY/TIFFANI : LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS
ALL : LOVE IS NOT LIKE
NO NO NO
LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS ON THE RADIO
ALL : LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS
JENNY/TONY/TIFFANI : LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS
ALL : LOVE IS NOT LIKE
NO NO NO
LOVE IS NOT LIKE THIS ON THE RADIO)

MR. FARRELL : Ah, that's a great tune. I love it!
SLY : Well, all right! When do we start?
MR.FARRELL : You don't. Nah, I hate the image. I was looking for a nice band. I'm sorry.
SLY : I am such an idiot! How could I have changed the Dreams' image? I'm a complete screw
      up!
TONY : I second the motion, Sylvester.
SLY : Yeah, well you should! I'm a lousy manager. You guys are better off without me. I'm a
      jerk! I'm a loser!!
TIFFANI : Stop it, Sly. Okay, so, it didn't work out. But you can't stay angry forever, because if
           you do you'll never get what you want. You'll never get what's important to you.
           You'll never get your mother.
SLY : What'd she say?
TONY : I believe she was talking about "your mother."
SLY : Okay, so I messed up the gig -- leave my mother out of this.
TIFFANI : No. Not your mother, my mother. I have to stop her.
TIFFANI : Hello? Oh. Hi, Jenny. No, I missed her. I couldn't get past security. My spikes set
           off the metal detector. No, thanks -- I'll be okay. Goodnight.
TIFFANI : Mom?
JUDY : You kept my stuffties.
TIFFANI : I love them. They remind me of you.
JUDY : What happened to Hoppy Harry?
TIFFANI : Sly.
JUDY : Should of known.
TIFFANI : What are you doing here? I went to the airport. I thought you'd left.
JUDY : I almost did. But I realized I would be making the same mistake that I did ten years
       ago. I didn't want to do that.
TIFFANI : I'm so sorry about what I said yesterday. I've just been angry for so long.
JUDY : Oh, honey, don't apologize. You have every right to be angry. What I did was wrong --
       I should never have left you. I missed you growing up. I missed everything.
TIFFANI : I miss you too, Mom.
JUDY : Ow! So, what do we do now?
TIFFANI : Well, we can never get back those ten years.
JUDY : I know.
TIFFANI : But maybe we can try to be friends.
JUDY : I'd like that.
TIFFANI : Me, too.

-THE END-